straight (calum hood au)

2. hated

the gif is zara, she's played by the beautiful isabella peschardt 

2. hated 

The night of the party Calum couldn't sleep at all and it made him so sad because his dreams were the only thing that made him happy, he could be himself but he couldn't even dream now because the only thing in his mind was Zara. Zara's smile, Zara's voice, Zara's, hair, Zara's skin, Zara's hands, Zara's eyes but most of all Zara's lips.

Zara's lips haunted him all night long, Calum swore his own had touch them even if it was for such a little time they touched and Calum felt something. Something he didn't feel when he kissed Michael or any other guy.

Calum had tried a few guys over the years, as if one would appear and cure him from his straightness but everytime his lips touched a guy's lips it felt so wrong and Calum didn't like it one bit. But with Zara's lips it was a whole other story, and he didn't really kiss her even though he wanted it so much.

His mind was all Zara and Calum hated it. He hated that he liked Zara, he hated that he couldn't stop thinking about her, he just hated being straight.

So that's how Calum spent the rest of his Friday night, and Saturday night and Sunday night, just thinking about Zara. He felt so stupid, she surely wasn't thinking about him. Is this how Luke and Michael felt about each other? Probably not because Luke and Michael are in love and Calum is not. Or is he? He didn't fucking know, he never felt love or any other type of feelings so how was he supposed to cope with all this at once?

Monday morning eventually came and Calum had dark circles under his eyes and even though he knew he was still straight he still did his am I still straight? routine. The answer was obvious.

Calum felt like going for a run but he knew Ashton would be on his driveway in twenty minutes to take him to school. Both his moms had already gone to work so Calum skipped breakfast, Calum didn't eat much.

So like every day he got in the car, had the same dialogue with Ash which was followed by the familiar silence and then the familiar parking spot and the good old pat in the knee.

The boys met their friends by Calum's locker and had a small chat about their weekend, Michael, Luke and Ashton had a chat, Calum just stayed quiet and looked around.

His eyes felt like they had a mind of their own as they quickly searched for her and Calum hated it so much, he didn't want to look for her.

But he did found her and he hated the way his heart started pumping blood faster and his thoughts got all caught up, Calum hated everything Zara made him feel.

He couldn't understand why he was only like this towards her, why not other girl? Why didn't he feel this way towards Maya, for example? She was also a beautiful girl. Maybe it was because Calum and Zara had a history and a past together even though it was a small one it still counted, they were best friends as little kids, they did grow apart has the years passed (for obvious reasons) but they still talked every day, even if it was just a small hello. It still counted to Calum.

Zara was with Maya like always but she wasn't smiling and laughing. Both girls were wearing serious expressions on their faces and Zara's lips were moving fast as she talked in a low voice to her ex-girlfriend.

Calum knew he was staring for too long when Zara's eyes met his, if it was any other day she would have probably smiled (that gorgeous smile Calum had grown to love over the years) but today was different, Zara didn't smile at Calum.