Material Boy (Lashton)

Chapter 23

Sad chapter
*hands out tissues for everyone*

Ashton's pov
I had to forget him, I needed to forget the memories, the feelings. They were overwhelming me, crushing me like a car in a scrap yard.

I had to forget. We couldn't be together, it wouldn't be right. And I knew just the thing, I knew it would crush Luke but I had to move on and so did he. This would help.

I dialled the number, it rung out.

"Hey, it's Josh. I can't answer the phone so leave a message after the beep."

"Hey Josh, it's Ash. This may seem random for me to call you but I was wondering if we could meet up and you know, sort things out? I miss you. Call me back. Bye"

I hoped this would work.

It did, about 5 minutes later I got a text asking me to meet him at the park.

When I arrived he was sat on the bench facing the other direction. I approached him and put my hand on his shoulder making him jump.

"Sorry." I said.

"It's okay babe." He replied.

"Look Josh I'm sorry for everything that happened. Can we maybe start over? I don't know if it's possible for us, but maybe, just maybe we would work again. We had some good times."

Without replying he grabbed my waist and pulled me to him, my lips touching his and we shared a short kiss. It didn't feel right or natural to be in his arms but I needed to do this. I could learn to love him, right?

Once I got home my mum was joined by Harry who was crying in her arms.

"What's going on?" I inquired.

"Michael's missing." The man sobbed.

"Oh."

"Ash could you join Louis and the boys to go find him?" My mum asked hopefully.

Of course I said yes and went over to the Tomlinson house and entered without knocking. The boys were gathered around the table devising a search mission. Louis looked drained, he brushed his fingers through his messed up hair. "Where would he go?" "What about friends from college?". Calum and Luke seemed ashamed to have no idea to any of his questions.

"Hi guys, sorry Harry said I could just walk in." I said quietly.

They all looked up and each of them said hello, telling me to join them.

"Okay, Luke you go with Ashton and check the skateboards and ask around. Calum you're with me"

We all set out on our mission in search of Michael. The walk to the skatepark with Luke was awkward to say the least. He looked like he wanted to say something but the words just couldn't come out.

It hurt to be in his presence, I just wanted to jump in to his arms and stay there forever. But I couldn't. I had to do this, for my mum she needed this and I needed to be separated from my love. I just had to.

"Ashton can we talk?"

"Don't. We need to concentrate on finding Michael. Please I can't do this." I pleaded and it killed me to see his hurt expression. "Okay." He replied weakly.

The skatepark was practically empty seeing as it was a cold night but the smoke lingering in the air indicated that there was someone around. We turned the corner and there stood Zayn and his skater friends laughing away.

They noticed us and Zayn approached "Yo bro" he Bro hugged Luke. "Didn't know you were coming out tonight man!"

"I'm not out. I'm actually looking for my brother, Michael. Have you seen him?"

"I- Um I dunno, man."

What is he hiding? Okay I'ma interrogate dis bitch.

"Cut the crap "dude" Where the hell is Mikey? It's obvious you know. So tell us. NOW!" I snapped. Both boys seemed surprised at my outbursts and Zayn started to get nervous.

"He's with Ed" Zayn shamefully looked at the ground. Who's Ed? The ginger one? Luke's eyes went wide.

"Where does he stay?" The clearly angry noodle demanded.

We were given an address and rushed to the house. I stayed close to his side as the neighbourhood was creepy. Once we reached the house Luke banged on the door repeatedly. It was answered by a middle aged woman with greying red hair wearing a night gown.

"The fuck do you want?"

"We need to see Ed." Luke simply said through gritted teeth. She held the door open for us and we stormed up the stairs and searched for the red head's room. Once we found it we were shocked by what we saw in front of us.

There Michael lay sleeping shirtless with a razor in his hand. His arms were completely covered with small red cuts, the sight looked worse since most of the cuts were smeared with fresh blood. Shit.

"Mikey. Mikey wake up." Luke cried, shaking the boy. He woke up after a while and glared at us.

"What the fuck are you doing here." He managed, was he on something?

"Come on we're taking you home, okay?" I said softly.

"No I'm happy here" he slurred. We tried to help him up but he cried and pushed us away. "Leave me alone, everyone is better off with out me!" The scene was truly heartbreaking but we knew we had to stay strong for Michael's sake.

"Mikey look at me."

"I'm fine."

"You're clearly not fine. You need help big bro."

"You're not my brother. I don't have a family." I could tell the words pierced Luke like a knife but he urged the boy to move anyway because he didn't mean it.

People who are depressed tend to push people away, feel unwanted and feel they'd be better off without. They feel worthless, useless and in some cases they lose the will to live. Being depressed can be like being injured and trapped in a dark room with no way to get out and no one can hear you screaming and crying out in pain, they don't even know you're there. You're completely alone. (In no way am I saying this is what depression is like for everyone, it's just how I see it from my pov. Sorry if I offend anyone).

The boy finally gave in and let us take him, we helped hold him up and guided him out of the house.

Luke called Louis and he came and picked us up.

"You're going to be okay Michael, it's going to be okay." I soothed him in the back of the car with his head rested on my knee as he cried and cried.

Louis frantically drove us home and he picked Michael up out of the car and rushed him into the house. Harry broke soon when he noticed us arriving. His baby was broken.

The cuts on Michael's arms weren't as deep as they first looked so he didn't need any medical attention but the Tomlinson's decided he still needed help so Louis and Harry drove their hurt son to the hospital.

Calum shook my hand as I left to go to my own house and told me I was a good guy and thanked me for my help and I left.

"Ash wait." I stopped and turned around. It was him. Fight the tears, fight the tears, fight the tears.

"Please don't push me away. I need you. We can't let this break us."

"I've made up my mind, Luke. It's impossible for us to be together."

"What if I stop this whole thing? Will you take me back?" He was desperate.

"No. We can't stop this, don't you think your family is going through enough? Don't ruin this for them."

And then for the second time, I walked away from the boy I loved.

Sorry if this chapter sucked. I kinda got emotional writing it.

How was it? Thoughts?

Love yous x