Ambiguity (Urban)

Chapter Two

Published: November 3, 2015

Jamal
(A few days later; Sunday)

"Look Jenaye, I'm not about to argue with you no more." I stepped past her and began packing up the few things she left over my crib over time.

"But you won't believe me! I said I was with Jasmine the whole night." She yelled, following me around the apartment.

"Jenaye, I wouldn't be questionin' your every move if you never stepped out on me a few months ago."

"Are you gonna throw that in my face every chance you get?

"Yes! The fuck you thought? You cheated on me, and I tried to make it work. But I just can't. I can't trust yo' ass no more and I damn sure ain't finna let you think that shit was okay."

I saw her eyes beginning to water, followed by streaks of tears. Did I love her? Probably so. I wouldn't even had considered taking her back if I didn't have some kind of love for her. But I just can't live like this anymore.

Jenaye and I been together for 2 years now. We met at a club, cliché I know. After we met, we kicked it every day. She seemed down for me, and I thought she was a good girl. She held me down when times was hard and I appreciated her for that. We never lived together, thankfully, but we were inseparable.

It was only a few months ago, I noticed she was going out more. She would always include her friend Jasmine into all her plans, which was weird to me. I thought, why is she spending so much damn time with this girl? I only found out Jenaye was cheating on me, when her phone accidentally called me. She really was around Jasmine this time, spilling her life story and infidelity. I heard their whole conversation, unbeknownst to her. I found out that Jenaye and this nigga was hitting it off for weeks.

Long story short, it hurt like hell to be betrayed by someone I thought I loved. So, I kicked her to the curb. However, recently we slowly started getting back into our old groove; there's no denying the history we have. She begged and confessed over and over how much of a mistake it was and how much she sees herself with no one other than me. The only thing is, my trust for her is completely gone. Every time she goes out, I think she's out with that nigga. I can't continue to live like that. So, I came to the conclusion that I'm done with this wack ass relationship, point blank.

"Look Naye, you're making this harder than what it should be. Let's just end things here, real talk." I sighed, grabbing her hands into mine.

"But Jamal, I-I love you. And you know that" She cried, "I know I messed up in the past, but I'm not on that shit no more, Jamal. I was in a confusing space at that that time and I wasn't sure what I wanted." She clutched on to me tightly.

"So you sure now? You sure you know what you want?"

She nodded while wiping her eyes. "I'm sure I know, I want you and only you."

It was hard to follow through, hearing her say shit like this to me. But it still ain't enough to make me stay. I'm done, for real this time.

I separated myself from her and took a step back. She looked up at me with an unreadable expression.

"Jenaye, I do love you... And I do care about you. But I can't do this shit no more." I stretched out my hand and passed her the bag of things I packed up for her.