The girl who fears love [Bard Ylvisaker]

Chapter 11 goodbye Bard's P.O.V

I was driving as fast as I could. I had her in her baby seat in the passengers seat.At red lights and stop signs I could try to give her C.P.R but I don't think it worked. She was crying but her face was still blue. I finally got to the E.R I ran inside and screamed "you gotta help me my baby's-she's not breathing" Then everyone was staring at me. Just a few seconds later nurses and Dr. came in and took her away from me only to leave me wondering what the hell was wrong with my baby girl.

A few minutes later which felt like hours a nurse came out and got her information but I still couldn't see her. They told me to stay in the waiting room to calm down and relax witch because I was crying and I was shaken up probably shouldn't of driven I knew I missed everything but my only concern was taking her to the E.R. It was a half hour later when Sam called me and she was wondering where I went and why I did't take the other girls with me. I wanted to tell her that I just wanted to take Ocean somewhere but I knew that I couldn't. I told her the truth and she flipped out started crying the second I told her. I convinced her to stay home with the other kids and that I would tell her what's going on. We also wanted to check in with each other because we was really shaken up about this. I have never had a baby die on me before but Mria Izzy's real mother did have a miscarriage a boy I wanted another boy I hoped that I would have a boy when Sam was pregnant with the girls.Don't get me wrong I love Izzy,Bay,Crystal,Haylee,Surbrina and right now Ocean more than ever but. This time I wanted a boy just for a change. Also I rarely see Ben and Surbrina they mostly come home do there homework and go to their uncle's Phil's hose with is fine with us hell one less little brat in my hair. An hour later A Dr. walked down the hallway "Mr. Ylvisaker?" he said I jumped up "yes" I said. He looked down and said "i'm so sorry sir Ocean is dead she stopped breathing and she had a hole in her heart we did the best we could to save her but it was too late I suggest you should call someone to pick you up you're not in any shape to drive right now" Than I started crying more than I ever did in my life.

Sam's P.O.V

When Bard came home he was crying and Vegard and Tiffany picked him up and that's when I knew that something was wrong "Bard?" I said in a week crying voice. Bard looked down and shook his head. I dropped to the floor and started crying. Bard ran over to me and held me we was both crying more than ever. The next day I woke up next to Bard. We was in bed I looked over and Bard had all of his clothes on even his jacket was lying there next to me just staring up at the ceiling. I touched his shoulder but he didn't move. I thought he was dead too. I kept saying to myself "if he's dead than i'm dead too i'm not going to live without my husband" Than I touched his face and he looked over. I was relieved that he wasn't dead but he was crying he didn't say anything and he didn't hold me. He just turned back and mumbled "I fucking hate life right now" I mumbled back "me too"

The next 2 weeks all we did was lay in bed we only got up to use the bathroom. The older kids did everything else like take care of the kids. We didn't go to work or school we was too sad and if someone would drop bye we would just lock the doors and lay back down. The door opened up and there was Izzy and Hayley standing there with a crying Bay. Once Bard saw her he bangin crying again. They said "okay now it's been 2 weeks you have to go to work and school" Bard rolled his eyes and rolled over facing me. After they left in frustration I touched Bard and said "you know they're right" he sighed and said "yeah I know but still" I got up and took care of Bay and Crystal even though it was too sad because crystal looked liked Ocean. I showered and got dressed and took the girls on a walk when I saw a little glowing girl appeared in front of me.

"who are you" I screamed at the top of my lungs. The little girl looked like she was about 13 she looked like Izzy. The girl hugged me started crying and said "i'm Ocean" I was in shocked I felt the tears coming and I held her. She said "I need to talk to dad before he takes the pills" I was in shocked I said "what are you talking about he's not like me he don't do that I do not him me" Ocean said "the pain was too much if he takes them then he's going to be with me" I started crying some more I just lost my daughter and now I might lose the man I love the most. We ran inside I opened up the bathroom door but it was too late all I saw was the pill bottles spilled on the floor and Bard was laying there with them in his hands he was knocked out. I took him to the E.R I knew he was dieing. He was not awake and he wasn't doing good. I was crying and I said "Bard please no don't go don't leave me" He woke up grabbed my hand and said "stand strong Sammy please I lived my life now it's time for me to go I love you Sam I will always love the girl who fears love" Than he pasted on. I was balling Vegard and Tiffany who was there started crying too. I looked over and I saw Bard and Ocean standing in the corner he was holding her hand and smiling. Than they disappeared forever.