The First Words 11.09.2006

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JOHN

            The same routine from yesterday repeats, at least for the first part. Tie. Blazer. Mirror. Encouragement. Walk. Head down. It’s a beautiful day outside, the autumn sun shining clearly on the fallen leaves. In my mind, I snapshot a picture, keeping it safe for later on when I sit in my room, thinking of something to draw. The shadows are getting shorter and shorter as the sun rises and I get closer to school. Sighing deeply, I walk up the steps, ignoring the stares and stolen glances I get. My head still bowed to society, I push the door open and drag myself over to the staircase. I then look up, and see a girl, arguing with someone on a topic I don’t understand. There must be a small window at the corner of the stairs, because her head is in the sunlight. I see the emotion on her face, constantly telling me that she is fighting fervently for what she believes in. Suddenly, she bends down to pick up her handbag, and with a final insult, walks up the stairs and out of view. It’s the girl from yesterday, the only one who didn’t care about who I was, and looked at me just as she would anyone else. The girl who gave me hope. The corners of my mouth rise slightly into a pale imitation of a smile as I walk up the stairs, up and up to room 201, my homeroom. She is standing alone at the end of the line waiting to get into homeroom. I gulp down my growing fear that she knows me, and walk up to her. “Uh… Hi?” I say, timidly, wondering what she was going to say.

            “Hey, I’m Laura, Laura Lacknarch. What about you? Are you new here?” She replies, a brilliant smile on her face and a genuine happiness to talk to me, glad to meet me, as if her whole life had been leading up to this point.

            “John Graham Lansee. I’m a freshman here.” I smile back, so glad at this point, that she didn’t just give off an aura of pity but rather one of growing curiosity about me, one that indicated wanting to become my friend.

            “Nice to meet you, John. I suppose you’ve been feeling a little bit lost, I mean you so remind me of… well, me, last year, when I first came. It’s strange! Like, my first couple of weeks were so confusing, but then I signed up for clubs met people, had fun, and it’s great, really, you just have to get to know the people.” She pauses to catch her breath. “Am I rambling? I do that a lot, so tell me if I –“ The bell rings, and she looks towards her homeroom door. “Oh, I should probably go to homeroom now. It was great to meet you, John! I’ll see you at break, you have got to tell me everything!” Another genuine smile. How does she do it? I mean, I would find it quite hard to be constantly cheerful

            I smile back at her, glad she didn’t completely hate me at first sight. “Yeah, I’ll see you then! Maybe we can hang out?”. “Sounds great!” She shouts over her shoulder, already running to her homeroom. “Yeah, I whisper, great.

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