A Vampire's Secret (Zero X Yuki and Ruca X Kaname)

Sinful Confession

Guess why I haven't updated in a million months? Well because when a writer's block takes over your brain and just makes you cram essays and information for exams, you can't exactly write anything for your fanfic. Even though those parts were planned I just could not bear writing anything during the last few months. It was awful. I tried writing shitty short stories on word to get my imagination back but nope. I was just staring at a blank screen for so long but now that I've told why i'm like this right now I feel better and i'm through that depressing phase.

With some miracle, Zero had accomplished a fast regenerating mechanism in his body. Even though the wounds he suffered would take months to heal, he was able to come out from his coma this night and had been knocked into reality with the help of the healing powers of several Vampires. Sometimes the remedies used on Converted Vampires like Zero kills them from the pressure and strength of the healing process. But one of the most highly medically experienced Vampire was pretty sure that Zero had the rare ability to regenerate mental and physical health. The Vampires may despise Zero since he never belonged with them, and he never will. But his condition astounded them to no limits and stroked their curiosity. And this anonymous beast was behind all this tragedy.

Yuki just needed a grip and being amidst all these dreadful Vampires was the least of her worries. She just needed some time to handle all these events. Everything was going slow and peaceful and only had a tinge of worry and stress in and suddenly all this blood and gore and sorrow just washes over her like a tidal wave. She had no time to anticipate or even guess such a thing. With tears and shaky limbs she watched as the only one she truly loved was carried to the infirmary of the Night Class. All the vampires felt pity for the poor girl. They surprisingly let her stay with Zero in the infirmary so that she wouldn't die of the worry already wracking her nerves. They gave her a blanket and a warm seat beside his bed and left for the night.

Yuki couldn't sleep. She felt the tears moisten her cheeks and lips time after time. No matter how many times tried to stop her helpless sobs, it wouldn't seem to end. She kept checking Zero's pulse, she kept pressing her ear to his bandaged chest in search of a heartbeat, and it was there. Her eyes wandered over the vampire's vulnerable and damaged body which was still healing. They did zone him out of the coma stage but he still hadn't regained consciousness completely. His handsome features were illuminated in the moonlight, sharpening them in the dark infirmary. She was still awkwardly dressed and her face still reflected a broken heart. But she didn't care. Zero was here and he was fine. He survived. That was all that mattered to Yuki. Yuki never wanted him to suffer through this undeserving hell, she almost regretted letting him run off like it was her own fault.

She intertwined her bony, small fingers with his pale, long ones. A rush of warmth from his hand, shot up in hers and gave her a sense of security she always felt around him. Her mind was a bit more at ease but it was hard not to cry at the sight. Eventually when she got a grip on her unstable emotions she looked at their woven hands, to her, it felt like those two hands belonged to each other like this. She sat on the bed, beside his sleeping form. Zero's mouth had parted open, his fangs just slightly sticking out of the rest of his normal teeth. The graceful curve of his jaw all the way to his admirable, muscled abdomen, everything about him just looked so mesmeric and alluring, so perfect. She brushed the stray strands of silver hair from his eyes and the moment she did that his eyes under his eyelids had moved minimally.

Yuki didn't pay much attention to that and starting running her fingers through his silky hair, wondering if he was even going to recall her name if he woke up. The gestures of her fingers soothed his breathing and made it more steadier than before. She could feel the way her heart was aching so badly, even if the worst moments of his state had passed. She almost lost him and this was driving her to tell him everything then and there before he actually was separated from her for good. She started revising the words Yuki always wanted to tell Zero, the words which would either bind two people into a fragile union, or form a separating glass which would be unbreakable.

Should I tell him? I'll have to wait for him to wake up.....

She didn't have any clue about how it would impact him. But she couldn't bottle up those feelings. She needed her words to be heartfelt and make him understand why she wanted, needed, him so badly that it was almost agonizing. Her nervousness started making her sweat slightly. Yuki thoroughly thought of what was the best thing to do when her heart was impatient to spill out the secrets at such a time where Zero could be overburdened with things.

And then she thought it was better to just whisper her words into the thin air, regardless of if it reached Zero's ears or not. At least she'll technically tell him in privacy.

"Uh..." She started speaking, her voice not doing a very good job right now. She cleared her throat and made sure he was completely unconscious right now or else it would be a huge blow to her confidence. "I know you can't exactly hear me right now," Yuki told the sleeping Zero in a soft tone, "and it is not the best time to tell you anything....." She gulped.

"But I need tell you this, I-I can't go any longer without keeping any secrets.... I-" Yuki paused abruptly, feeling the blush creep up to her cheeks. I have to do this.

"I love you, Zero.... I've always loved you and I'm sorry I didn't tell you before. I was not honest about my feeling with anyone before, and this time I was not even honest to myself" Yuki fixated her gaze over Zero's angelic face, truly craving to kiss his pale lips. A tear surfaced on her eyes but her voice didn't waver "I know I'm not good enough for you. I'm not the girl you'd desire would you?" She let the question be answered by the rustling of the wind. "I just needed to tell you that I care about you and I'm really terrified to lose you like I almost did today, and that its okay if you don't love me the same way. But please don't deprive yourself of something you need. It almost killed you today. I know you need my blood and it doesn't matter to me if it imposes a risk on me. We can't really even love each other now that we're not the same species but I'll readily do anything to keep you at ease.... even if it kills me."

Her eyes widened when she said that, she couldn't believe she actually got out so many of her locked thoughts through the words she was not even good at delivering. Her lips quivered, she would never say such honest things again, it was embarrassing and her face was crimson with the shame. She uncurled her fingers from their woven hands and pulled her hand out slowly underneath his. She stopped her soothing massage over his hair and got up, her head hung down as if she had just been rejected. Her breathing had suddenly increased at a rapid pace as she buried her face in her hands and ran out of the room. She had sinned

His violet orbs underneath his eyelids opened, his face flustered and flattered with a red tint. He breathed hard as he slowly sat up and nervously sent a hand into his hair, clenching the strands she had touched, in surprise. If only Yuki knew that Zero had heard her confession.....

I love you too....