Dreams And Passion

FORGIVENESS

I feel really bad for not telling Alex the truth that I was at my cousins' house. He knows everything about except for one thing but that is a thing that only one person besides me knows and I am hoping that it will stay that way. Usually whenever we fight he comes to talk to me irrespective of who is right and wrong. Well it seems that I will have to go and talk to him. He has been avoiding me the whole day and whenever I try to go and talk to him he won't let me talk either because he escapes from there or starts talking to whoever is standing near him even whether he knows them or not.

Why is the last bell not ringing? I think to myself since I am bored as hell during history class.

Finally the bell rings and hurry to find Alex but of course he is trying to avoid me. Finally I found him on the bus sitting in our usual set but he put a book near my seat.

"Is this seat taken?" I ask him.

"Might be. Why do you want to know?" he asks me.

'That's it' I think to myself. "Well if this seat is taken I guess I just have to find someone else to sit next to." I know that I lose control over my anger, if you didn't understand that. I start to leave to find another seat.

"Hey I am sorry ok. I just got so angry that you went to your cousins to drink with them. I just want you to do well and concentrate on your studies." He tells me quite apologetically.

"First of all I don't drink. I thought you knew that. Second of all I do well in studies ok. Just because I forget to do homework does not mean that I do not study." I tell him.

"Wait back up. If you don't drink then why did you go to your cousins' house? He asks me.

Remember that secret I was talking about. Well the reason why I go there is part of the secret and I just cannot tell him about it. So I guess I have to lie to him again.

"I just went to see how they were doing and then my mom gave me some food to take to them." I tell him quite hoping that he doesn't realize that I am lying to him.

"Oh. Well you could have told me that earlier." He tells me looking quite relived.

Whew............. Escaped............

"And hey by the way who were you talking to earlier at school anyway?" he asks me.

"Uh....... Greg......" I tell him hoping that he won't get mad at me. But he looks sort of sad when he hears this.

"Have you forgiven him yet?" he asks me.

"Uh in case you have forgotten he cheated on me remember?" I tell him almost angrily.

"No I haven't forgotten it. I just wanted to know. Sorry if I hurt you. I didn't mean to." He tells me apologetically.

"It's ok. And I am sorry that I didn't tell you that I went to my cousins' house. And I promise that I will do better in remembering school work and all. I promise" I tell him and hoping that I can keep my promise I made to him.

"Great. You do know that if you work hard you can achieve great marks in this year's exams right? You used to do so well until your sister............" he trails off realizing that he had hit a sore spot.

"Can we just leave it? You know that I don't like to talk about it." I tell him.

"Yeah sure. I am sorry that I even brought it up." He says.

"It's ok. So me being a good girl starts from tomorrow ok." I tell him.

"It's great. And you should promise me something ok." He asks me.

"Yeah ok." I am hoping that it does not lead to where I think this is leading.

"Promise me that from now on we will not have any secrets between us. Promise?" he asks pleadingly.

This is exactly like I feared. I cannot tell him my secret just because since he is very close to my mom since his mother died.

"Promise" I tell him with my fingers crossed behind my back."

"Ok" he tells me quite happily that it breaks my heart that I am lying to him.

"Anyway I have to go. My stop is here." I tell him half relieved.

"Yeah ok. Bye. See you tomorrow." He tells me and waves.

I get off the bus and wave back to him.

Thank God I am home alone today. Otherwise I would have to go to my cousins house to do this.............