I Hate Beautiful Men

chapter 18 "Janitor's Closet"

wee sorry for the long wait I've been very busy... as in super busy... now that I'm back in school and I'm already in fourth year college so my schedule is very hectic.... so from now on... i'm so sad to say this but i'm going to upload every week end. I am going to TRY to make it longer for you though... thank you for your continuous support and I love you all!!!!

Edited by Brianna Pollard :)

Chapter 18

*SANTANA MILLER*

I don’t know how long I slept but I swear I dreamt of Brian saying that he loves me. That was a weird dream. My body was still aching. I open my eyes and a bright figure appeared in my vision. I blinked until it became clear. It’s Craig.

“How are you?” he asks brushing my hair and kisses my forehead.

“Ok… I think.”

“Honey!” Mom said jumping on me.

“OW! Mom please, I’m injured.” I said and she let go.

“Sorry, I was just so worried about you.” She said.

“The people who did this to you will be arrested. I’ll make sure that they will be punish.” Bret said.

“I-I don’t know Bret, but I think they didn’t mean it.” I said.

I know that they hurt me… a lot. But they did it because the girl is in love with Craig. Maybe there are things that you do even though it’s wrong, when you fall in love.

“What do you mean?” Craig said.

“Craig they didn’t mean it… I mean yeah sort of but… she didn’t mean it… I think.”

“Santana, you’re being nice, but they have to pay. Carmen told me what happen, they were on drugs when they did that to you.” Craig said.

“And did Carmen told you why they did that to me?”

“N-no.”

“Mom, Bret can we talk in… private?” I asks them. They look at each other then walked out.

“Craig they… well she attacked me because she thought that I took you away from her.”

“What?”

"She loves you Craig.” I said and Crag is taken aback.

“She’s on drugs, how can you say that?”

I rolled my eyes. He’s so stubborn, the one thing they had in common, him and Brian.

“I saw it on her eyes, she actually cried when I said that… you wouldn’t go for a low life slut like her.”

“Santee.” Mom peeks from the door.  For a second I thought it was Brian calling me Santee. “Sorry but the doctor is here.” She said.

Craig brushed his hair with his hands. The doctor came in and checked me.

“Let’s just send them to rehab.” I suggested when the doctor left.

“Are you sure about that?” Bret asked.

“Positive.” I said. Bret gave me a look and then nodded. “Thank you.” I said. Craig chose to be silent.

Mom and Bret went home; well I insisted that I can take care of myself but Craig said that he would stay with me so they went home.

“Stop frowning.” I said when I can’t take it anymore. “I know your piss.”

He looks at me and then sighed. He went nearer to my bed and brushed my hair. “I’m just sorry… for what happen. I mean it’s all my fault.” He said.

“It’s nobody’s fault. How many times do I have to tell you guys that?”

He pause. “What do you mean?”

“Brian told me that it was his fault too.” I said. I’m so upset with what’s happening to the both of them.

“Why would he blame himself?

“Because he’s the reason why I went to school early.” I said and then my eyes widen when I realize what I just said something that would bring trouble.

Craig grimace. “Why are you avoiding him?”

“Uh.. ah.. we had some… you know… sibling’s fight?” I said hoping that he would believe me.

He was about to say something when the door open…. Brian. O gosh, please no trouble. I silently prayed.

“What did you do to make her go early to school?" Craig ask. My heart starts to beat fast.

“Please no trouble.” I said to myself over and over again.

Brian gave me a look. I shrug  and gave him a I-don’t-know look.

“Well… we… I … kiss her.” He said and my eyes pop wide open. What the heck is he doing? Craig looked at me.

“I-is that true?” he asked and he’s mad. His eyes were dark. I’ve never seen him like this before.

“Don’t blame her, I did it without her consent. “ Brian said.

I saw Craig’s fists turn into tight balls and he turned punching Brian right in his face.

I bolted up into sitting position. “Stop it.” I yelled.

Craig grabbed Brian’s collar. “Why did you do that?!” Craig demands for answer.

“Craig please stop!”

“Why did you kiss her?!” Craig said totally ignoring me.

“Because I love her!” he said and all of us fell into silence.

I took a deep breath looking at both of them. I don’t know what to say. My brain usually malfunctions in times like this so I think this is natural for me. But did I heard it right? He loves me? So that was not a dream? I should feel bad about this because of Craig but… I feel happy. My heart is like dancing a chicken dance. No one dared to speak; suddenly mom and Bret came in.

“Oh my… what happen?” mom gasped when she saw Brian’s bleeding lip.

“Ah… nothing, I stumble on the… doorknob.” Brian lied.

“Oh, be careful next time okay?” Mom said.

“Yeah.” Brian replied.

The tension between the three of us disappeared when our parents came back. They forgot the laptop and after a while they left again, this time Brian left with them which is a good idea. But now I’m left with Craig in an awkward situation.
Silence is still in our midst. I press my lips waiting for him to talk.

“W-what do you feel for him?” Craig asked after a while.

“I… I don’t know.” I said lowering my head.

He said. “Did you kiss him back?” he asks and I looked at him.

I swallow a lump. “Y-yes.”

“Damn it.” He said in loud tone that made me close my eyes. Tears started to form.

“I’m sorry, I know I shouldn't have done that… but… I don’t know.”

“Do you like him?”

“I told you I don’t know.”

“Do you love me? Or even at least like me?” He asks.

“I… I don’t know either.”

“Then why did you agree to be my girlfriend?”

I didn’t respond. I don’t know what to say.

“You love him didn’t you? You just used me to cover your confused feelings for him.” He said.

“No… I didn’t use you.”

“Then why did you say agree to become my girlfriend?”

I pressed my lips. “I don’t know.” I said with a low voice.

“Damn it Santana. That’s just a simple question!”

“No it’s not, its hard Craig. Do you think it’s easy for me to choose between the two of you? What are you toys? And what do you think of me? Do you think I am okay with this? Yes, I am confused with Brian, but it never came to mind to use you.” I burst out and tears came running down my eyes.

There’s this silence again. All I could hear is my sniff and the sound that the aircondisioning was making.

“I think I should leave you alone. And you should sort your feelings out. And when you finaly discover your true feelings… please let me know.” He said and left.

Now that this time has come, I feel so alone. I am wrong, I know I’m wrong. Maybe I did use Craig, but I tried my best to love him.

^^^

Day went by unnoticed. Craig never came back after that. Brian and I chose not to talk to each other, after what happen I think both of us don’t know what to do or what to say to each other.
About the girls that ganged up on me, they were sent to rehab and now I’m back in school after three days in the hospital and a week of house rest. Carmen and Darren have been supporting me, they actually brought me notes everyday and hung out in my house, which they like a lot. They are like literally playing in my room, every time.

“Guys please I can carry my own tray.” I said when we were in the cafeteria.

“Sorry, were just worried, you still have some bruises.” Darren said.

“It’s just bruises. I can still carry my stuff and I can still walk.” I said and Carmen giggled.

“Yes, Princess.” She said.

We heard the loudspeaker crack and everyone fell silent.

“All students please proceed to the school gym in 30 minutes. Thank you.” the announcer said.

We look at each other.

“What could it be?” Darren asked.
Carmen and I both shrugged.

After 30 minutes, all the students started toward the gym. It created a human traffic jam from everyone trying to go at the same time. We went with the crowd and I got separated from Carmen and Darren.

“Carmen?” I shouted. “Ow.” Someone bump into me.

I was walking through the students when I stepped on something that made me go out of balance. I waited to hit on the floor but it never came. I open my eyes.

“Are you okay?” Brian asked me and holding me up.

“Ah… yeah.” I said and Brian helped me stand up. “Thanks.” I said and turns away from him when he grab my hand. “What the…” Brian pulled me to the opposite side of the gym. “Brian where are we going?”

“Just follow me.” He said and we went threw hallway after hallway. Finally there was empty one. He was about to say something when we heard voices. I don’t know why but he looked panicked and then looked from left to right and then grabs me again and went in… the janitor’s closet.

“What are you doing?” I asked and pushed him. He fell to ground hitting some cleaning materials. “Ops, sorry.” I reach my hand for him, but instead of standing up, he pulled me making me fall.

“Sorry.” He said with a smirk.

Gosh, I miss that smirk.

I compose myself. “What are you doing?” I asked him and tried to stand but Brian’s hands were already around my waist and held me tighter.

“I miss you.” He said looking straight into my eyes.

‘OH GOSH…. PLEASE BUTTERFLIES IN MY STOMACH BEHAVE.’ I thought.

My eyes were focusing on him. Without waiting for my reply Brian reached for my face and gave me a kiss…. I’m expected a long one but he just gave me a … peck.

I raise my eyebrow. “That’s all?” I asked. Wait, why am I asking like I want him to kiss me more?
Brian laughed quietly. I blushed.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to laugh.” He said but he was still laughing.

“I didn’t mean anything by that.” I said.

Brian held my face to face him. “Santee…” Gosh, I can’t believe I miss him calling me Santee. “… I can give you more anytime you want.” My cheeks were as red as a tomato, I bet. Good thing it’s a bit dark in here, so that I can’t really see his face or else I would have fainted by now.

“What are you talking about?”

“What is you answer about… what I said… those words?”

“What words?” he sighed and rolled his eyes at me. “What was it?”

“When I said… I love you.”

I made an internal gasp. Is he really going to ask me now? In here?

“Y-you said it?” I tried to speak.

“Yeah.. like two times.. well three times now.”

“When was the first one?”

“At the hospital, when we were alone?” he said.

“That was true? I thought I was dreaming.” I said and stopped myself from saying more when I saw him waiting for my answer.

“Santee, I’ll say it again and please do tell me how you really feel towards me… I love you.” He said.

My heart skipped like ten beats. I have to say something… think Santana, this is not the time to be an empty brained idiot.
“W-what about Craig?” I said. ‘STUPID’ I thought.

“This time, it’s just between the both of us. Now tell me.”

“I don’t know.”

He clicks his tongue. “Santee…”

“Fine, so impatient.... Iloveyoutoo.” I said very quickly.

I look at him when he didn’t respond. He’s like… not breathing. A smile slowly appeared in his pretty face.

“Really?” He asked and I nodded shyly. “Hahaha really?” he asked again.

I roll my eyes and slapped his shoulder. “I won’t repeat it ….” I couldn’t finish what I was saying... Brian started to shower me with his kisses.

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