Chapter 1

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"Ashlyn, I swear if you touch the radio one more time, I am going to kill you". After 16 hours on the road, Lori Chalupny had long since past the point of questioning her decision to join this road trip posse. It had been Heather O'Reilly's idea just a couple days after their gut-wrenching loss to Florida State. Most of their teammates thought the idea of a road trip to watch the national championship sounded like emotional torture, but Heather quickly gathered together a small group for the excursion.

"If you'd rather, I could just sing for you all". They had already heard plenty of Ashlyn's singing. Caffeine and the knowledge they were nearing the Louisiana-Texas border was plenty of motivation to keep the young goalkeeper excited.

Yael Averbuch, a freshman tag-along, had just finished her driving shift and was trying to sleep in the back seat next to Heather. The youngest of the bunch, Yael was finally exhausted enough to be fed up with the antics of her older teammates O'Reilly and Harris. "Please, Lord, no... no more singing. Just let her play the music, Lori." The lanky girl, curled uncomfortably in the back of the old Jeep, groaned for emphasis.

Heather, who had just downed another Red Bull and never needed caffeine to begin with, stopped bouncing in her seat when Yael half-heartedly kicked her in complaint. "Oh, sorry," she mumbled before leaning forward to talk to Ashlyn. "Look for an oldie's station."

Ashlyn seemed to consider the idea for a moment before nodding assent. "Eh, ok. I can do oldies. It's not gonna be as good as country, though."

Lori looked over at her teammate long enough to make sure her eye-roll was visible. "Anything will be better than listening to the same loop of songs we've been listening to for the last ten hours."

Heather grinned, "Hey, don't forget the polka station. And the Spanish music." Ashlyn laughed - a lighter, more girly sound than you'd expect to come from the decidedly tomboyish prankster. Lori shared none of their mirth. "Aw, come on, Chalupny... we're almost there." Heather's tone was conciliatory, and she elbowed Ashlyn just in time to keep her from cracking another joke.

Even though she could be just as ridiculous as Ashlyn, Heather had known Lori for years and always knew just when to pull the brakes on her own antics. This was typical - Heather serving as a mediator between Ashlyn and just about everyone else on road trips. She and Ashlyn became fast friends when Harris came onto the team. After taking time off to play with the U-20 USWNT, it had been hard for the talented keeper to accept being sidelined by an ACL tear. She just wanted to play - and after this redshirt year they all knew that Ashlyn would play, but it sure helped for her to have someone like Heather to help her feel included in the meantime. Ashlyn was plenty outgoing, but it was still a challenge to bond with the players her age coming in as an older freshman. Not being able to play made it more difficult too, but Heather knew her a little from the national team and spared no time adopting her as just as much a part of the team as their senior members. And everyone - really everyone - loved HAO.

Quickly taking note from Heather, Ashlyn ratcheted down her tone a few notches. "I promise not to sing again," she paused momentarily to weigh her words, "until we get into College Station. Scout's honor."

Ashlyn was just as deft at smoothing things over as Heather when she wanted to be, and Lori couldn't quite hold back her small smile. "You weren't really a girlscout, were you?"

Ashlyn leaned back into the passenger seat and shrugged as Heather stretched farther forward to scan through new radio stations. "No. But I love Samoas and Tagalongs. And I'm pretty sure the first girl I kissed used to be a girl scout."

"Mmm," Heather paused at a pop station before pressing the "seek" button again, "I like Thin Mints." Just a moment later, Heather landed on an oldies station and leaned back. Charlie Rich's "The Most Beautiful Girl" was playing, and Ashlyn immediately sat up straighter.
Heather flicked the back of her head just before she belted out a line, and she tightly clamped her mouth shut as she leaned back into the passenger seat.

To their credit, Heather and Ashlyn kept their silence for quite a while, even resorting to license plate games. Yael's heavy breathing was the most noise they heard in the Jeep until they made a pit stop (Yael woke up and had to pee) an hour outside their destination. After that, all bets were off until they checked into their hotel room and quickly passed out beneath flowery comforters.
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Ali Krieger breathed in deeply and held the cool air in her lungs before letting it out in a slow sigh. She had been sighing a whole lot lately. It started about a week ago, before she could ever touch the pitch in tournament play. Now, with her Penn State team tasting the aftermath of semifinal defeat to Portland, her sighs had become even heavier than they had first been when she broke her leg.

Of course, her sighs were now accompanied by those of the entire team. Still, there was weightiness to her thoughts that came with the great "what-if?" What if she hadn't broken her leg? What if she had been starting those games, just like all year? What if she had been playing defense against Portland? Their defense had been stellar all game... but still, she couldn't ignore the lingering unknown. And with that unknown came guilt for her uselessness.

From where she sat on her hotel bed, Ali stole a glance at Erin and Carm. Erin Mcleod and Carmelina Moscato, her inseparable Canadian teammates, were playing UNO on Erin's bed. Both girls were seniors, and no one was taking their loss harder. Erin had been brilliant in goal all year, but Ali knew that penalty kicks in their semifinal loss would resonate much deeper than the fact that she had kept Christine Sinclair from scoring all game long. She wished she could do something, but she was feeling the angst just as strongly as they were.

Ali lay back on her still-made bed, not bothering to use the pillow. Brent was probably waiting on her to text him back, but she couldn't find the oomph to pick up her phone and carry on a conversation with her boyfriend. She knew he wouldn't be upset though. Brent was an athlete too, and he understood the listlessness that came with this kind of loss. She closed her eyes, but her mind was still moving too quickly for her to actually get any rest. A few minutes and at least one UNO game later, a knock came from the door. Carm and Erin didn't even seem to notice it, so Ali got up and maneuvered to the door as quickly as she could on crutches. She opened the door while awkwardly balancing against the wall and was greeted by the only teammate she had seen smiling since yesterday's loss.

Allie Long, a freshman, looked spent but still wore part of her seemingly permanent grin on her young face. "Hey, Kriegs. Is Carm still in there?"

"Yeah, her and Erin are playing UNO." Ali tried to manage a grin for the girl. The poor freshman had looked lost the past 24 hours, clearly wanting to help ease everyone's misery but knowing her efforts were useless.

"OK," Allie rubbed the back of her neck and glanced down at Ali's leg brace, "I'm sorry, Kriegs, I didn't mean to bother you. I just wanted to bring Carm a room key card, because she left it and I keep starting to fall asleep. I don't want her to get locked out."

Ali wasn't sure how Carmelina had gotten placed with a freshman for this trip, because that didn't happen very often, but she mostly felt sympathy for Allie over the situation. The girl had been walking on eggshells all week to make sure Carm didn't get irritated with her.

Ali looked over her shoulder at her teammates, who were still focused on their card game. She had an idea that she hoped would ease some of the tension for all her friends. "Hey, Allie, would it be ok if me and Carm switched rooms for the night?" Allie, looking more exhausted by the second, visibly relaxed at the suggestion. "Oh yeah, sure!... I mean, if Carm is ok with it."

Of course, Carm and Erin agreed to the arrangement, and fifteen minutes later Allie had carried her bag down the hall to her and Carm's room, and Ali was under the sheets listening to her new roommate's steady breathing. She knew this sick feeling wasn't going away anytime soon. The only thought she could find comfort in was that she would be spending the weekend with her brother Kyle before flying back to school. After that it'd only be a week or so before Christmas break and her mom's wedding.

Thoughts of Kyle and the rest of her family eased the furrow on her brow, and a few minutes later sleep mercifully found her.

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