Emma

25: Laura

Ellen had eventually given me all the necessary information of the whereabouts of Emma's mother (along with many warnings to stay at home so as to keep my sanity), so I could set out to find her when ready. The ward she was kept on only allowed family to visit, so I decided I would pretend to be Ellen – I knew her date of birth, and even her address, from Facebook, so hopefully I could put on a convincing act. I was just waiting for the right moment to go.

I had still not told Simon about my plans, as I'd decided it would be best to keep him in the dark about the whole thing, for fear of him persuading me I was taking things too far. Instead, I trusted my instincts. They told me that I needed to find out more about the woman who had raised my child. Whether she was in a good mental state or not.

Over tea, I thought about when it would be best to make the trip. We were eating chicken and leek pie, the first meal we had ever had with Emma, reminding me of the day she had arrived and the weeks that had followed. I watched her eat, stabbing at the pie with her fork, thinking about how much this little girl had changed. Sometimes, it was easy to forget that she was only seven (nearly eight now), as she was so grown up in many ways. Not all of them were good.

Luke wasn't seated in his normal place at the table – he was situated as far away from his family as was possible, his head down and posture slumped. I still couldn't understand what had happened; he was acting like a grumpy teenager and he was only seven!

"Lukey? Can you pass me the gravy please?" Emma asked, her voice light and sweet as always. Somehow, it didn't seem to fit with her look anymore. It sounded wrong.

As soon as the words had escaped her lips, Luke's hand darted out, his body jolted upright as if he was a puppet being tugged into action by its strings. He grasped the gravy jug by its handles, got out of his seat and took it to Emma's place with immense speed. I almost thought he was going to pour the gravy out for her, but as soon as the gravy was set back on the table, her rushed back to his seat and assumed his original, slumped position.

"That was the quickest gravy passing I've ever seen!" Simon teased.

Luke shrugged, his shoulders barely rising above his body. I was sure I could see his lips quivering, but I tried to persuade myself it was a suppressed smile.

"I'm done." He stood up from his place to leave the room, probably to go hide in his bedroom, where he was currently spending the majority of his time. His plate was empty – probably the fastest it had ever been cleared, as he was normally a fairly slow eater.

"Emma, do you know what's up with him?" I decided to ask when he was gone.

"No." She shook her head, almost thoughtfully. "Well, actually, I think I might have an idea."

"Please tell me."

"Though I'm not sure he'd really want you to know."

"You have to tell us," Simon added. "It could be really important."

"Okay," she agreed. "Well... he did tell me that some of the boys in his class said some nasty things to him." Relief flooded my body. It was a problem I could solve. And I could begin solving it now.

"Thank you," Simon said.

"You know what? I think I'll go have a word with him now." I slid off my chair. It was time to find out the truth from Luke. "I'll be back down soon."

His room was silent. He was sitting on his bed, staring into space, like he'd been doing for the past few days. Tears spilled down his cheeks, so I went and sat next to him, wrapping my arms around his small body, rocking him back and forth like I used to do when he was a baby.