Until Dawn AU's and More

schemer!josh headcannons

• josh LOVES event planning. birthday parties, regular parties, halloween parties, any kind of party. his profile says he's a party animal and it's true- because he's usually the one THROWING the party.

• if you want a surprise party to actually be a surprise, get josh to throw it. he knows all the best venues, always keeps the secret, and has a knack for spotting blabbermouths and keeping them in the dark until the last second.

• he favors theme parties, and has been known to go a bit over-the-top at times, like when he tried to commission a fake ocean and miniature galleon for a pirate party and got about 10% into construction before his dad shut him down.

• his favorites tend to be halloween parties, because whether he is throwing or attending, he WILL have the best and most realistically terrifying costume, mostly because he starts preparing for halloween in like july. (along with the twins, with whom he always coordinates his costumes.)

• josh has been known to micromanage guests at his parties to try and hook them up with each other. the shit he pulled with chris and ashley, while extreme, is not without precedent.

• no matter how hard he parties, he's always got one ear open for gossip and loves knowing everybody's business, even if he rarely does anything with the information. he's good at convincing people to tell him stuff.

• he's also good at convincing people to sell him stuff, and has never had trouble procuring alcohol despite being underage. some say it's bribery, some say it's pure charisma. let's be honest; it's probably both.

• for someone with zero interest in acting as a profession, josh is fantastic at it. he can cry on cue. he's done so to get out of trouble several times. even emily is impressed with his crocodile tears.

• this also makes him an excellent liar, to the point where even knowing in advance that he is a liar won't help you see through him if he's really trying. that said, he's actually fairly honest most of the time. it's one of the secrets to being a good liar- lie only when you have to.

• josh rarely turns his talents to evil ends. mostly he lies and schemes to get stuff for his parties, set up his friends, and get them all out of messes. his warmth and generosity ensure he is generally well-liked, and has few enemies.

• but on the rare occasion someone does get on his darkside, oh lord... he won't confront you directly, no. that's not how josh handles problems. he's sneaky. he's vicious. he will smile to your face and plot behind your back. he'll wait, for months if necessary, until your guard is down, and then he'll strike.

• his retribution is always just, in his eyes at least. he never gives back more than he got, and once the score is settled, if the offender is sorry, he's happy to forgive. he won't forget though. he never forgets.

• so in josh's eyes, they should have known. they should have seen him coming. they've always known what he was capable of, what he was like. if they thought they could get away with doing what they did, that he would just smile and let it slide... well, then it's clear they never really knew him at all, did they?

• (often, josh uses his parties and schemes to distract himself and hide from his own issues. like i said, he doesn't like to confront things directly. it's something he learned from his parents. if you just ignore a problem, and pretend it isn't there, eventually it will go away, right? right?)