You beat, cheated, & raped me...but never loved me.

Chapter 1

I kneeled to the ground looking at the scene in front of me.  I touched his body and felt nothing but damp blood.  The air that blew around me was so cold I swear the wet ground turned to ice.  A change in the scene and atmosphere was happening.

I put my hand on my head for support.  I felt so dizzy that I had to sit on my ass for a second.  I looked at my hand and saw nothing but my own blood this time.  The results as to what he had done.  I stared at his body as it laid there on the ground.  It gave me such a relief  to see him in that predicament that I simply closed my eyes. 

Memories of everything that happened filled into my head.  Not just memories of what happened tonight, but of memories for the past few months.  Memories of my personal hell.

I heard sirens in the distance coming our way.  Most people would be thrilled if they just lived a near death experience.  They would hop up and down in joy and run over to meet the cops mid way.  Not me.  I just sat there.  Motionless.  Pretty much breathless.  And...and...

"Excuse me ma'am" said an officer.

"Yeah..." i said.

"I would like to get you checked out by a paramedic.  Then if you are up to it then maybe we can bring you in for questioning." he said to me.

"What's there to ask?  I was in a near death experience and tried to kill the bastard.  What else is there to say?" I asked the officer.

He simply looked at me.  Probably in shock as to my state of mind but I didn't care.  I simply stared at the ground and never gave him no eye contact.

"What has happened to you ma'am?" he asked me.

"What has happened?  I'll tell you Mr. Officer."

I moved my feet so I was straddled on the ground.

" These past few months of my life have been a living hell." I said simply.

"How so?"

"See that man right there?" I asked him pointing to the body lying on the ground, "He ruined my life."

"Do you want me to help you up?" he asked.

I ignored him.

"That man beat me.  Cheated on me.  Raped me." I said whiping my face on my sleeve.

"Did you file a report?" he asked.

I still ignored him.

"But do you wanna hear something better?  Out of all of that, he never, never...loved me."

After saying those few things, I now sat here in the police station.  This hard chair not bringing much comfort to my aching body.  I have not seen so much craziness in my life.  Police men walking everywhere.  Dogs on watch. Wackjobs, prostitutes, crackheads, and much more going in and out of the building.  Oh my god.  The same police officer that helped me earlier came and over to me.

"Why don't you come over to my desk.  Okay." he said to me.

I just nodded and followed him to his desk.  They gave me a blanket to wrap myself around and I simply would not let go of it.  It made me feel protected.

"Okay Miss...oh I'm sorry.  I didn't even ask for your name." he said feeling type stupid.  I would too.

"My name's Tiana." I told him.

"Okay.  Well Miss Tiana.  Would you mind giving me the story as too what happened to you?"

I sat silent.   I hate to be a bitch to someone who want's to help me, but I couldn't help it.

"Look, I know it is hard on you.   I don't want to force you any pain, but it would help me help you."

I looked at him deep in the eye.

"I'm sorry I'm like this.   It's just what...he has turned me into." I said hanging my head.

"Don't worry.   I find you to be quite nice actually."

Something from that statement made me smile.  I even think my face hurted from the motion of something it hasn't felt in a long time.

"His name was Derek." I started off.

The officer began writing all of this down.  I could tell this was going to be a long night.  After scribbling that note down he looked back up at me to continue the story.

"In the beginning, he was the best thing I ever had.  Me being with him was like heaven.  That was until..." I stopped.

"Until what?" he asked.

"Until that heaven turned to hell." I said.

He looked at me with an intense look.  I don't think he was just doing his job, but was actually wanting to know about what happened.

"I used to be a happy kid.  I was smart.  Bright.  Kind.  Happy.  Fun.  Popular.  Beautiful.  It sounds like the perfect life," I said as I kind of chuckled, "But all things don't have a happy ending." I told the officer.

"What happened?" he asked in almost a whisper.

"It started a few months ago.  It was the beginning of junior year at school.  Everything started out so great until, well let me tell you the whole story."