THE CURB (MATURE HARRY STYLES AU) #WATTYS2016

CHAPTER EIGHTY

YOU GUYS STILL READING MY BOOK? AAH, I LOVEEE YOUU

Relief washes over me as I watch Harry's eyes flying open, his body suddenly goes tense and I feel his jaw clenching under my touch. His eyes are blood shot red and he blinks them a number of times before they finally focus on to me.

I feel my tears trickling down my cheeks as I take in his broken state. Even though he's drunk, there's pain and sorrow written all over his face and I feel like it's because of me.  He's in this state because of me.

It never would've happened if had just accepted my fate in the very start. I could've learned to somehow live with him, I could've told him the truth when he was mentally stable enough to accept it but no, I did the exact opposite. I retaliated, I fought, I ran away and this is where it brought me. To the point where I hate myself for him being this hurt.

"I'm.. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything, I swear." I start when Harry stays completely silently even after the passage of a few minutes.

"I've been a selfish bitch this entire time and I'm sorry. I'll do anything to take it all back." I ramble on, watching Harry closely for some sort of change in expressions or for him to respond in any other way.

"Say something please." I say, desperation clear in my voice as I talk, both of my thumbs grazing over his cheekbone.

When Harry still says nothing, I look up towards Selvia helplessly, only to find her cupping her mouth with one hand as she tries to hold her sobs in. Her eyes fixated on something on the ground.

Curiously, I follow her gaze and a gasp escapes my mouth when it falls onto Harry's bloody wrist. The cut he inflicted on himself must be much more deeper than I had assumed since the fresh blood is still pouring out of the wound.

"Oh my god." I whisper, hand falling away from Harry's face as I bring it closer to his injured wrist.

With a little hesitation, I press my fingers against the cut on the skin causing Harry to flinch and I immediately let go, eyes snapping up towards his face.

"I'm.. I'm sorry." I rush out as Harry frowns, moving his arm away from my reach. "Does it hurt really bad?"

Harry watches me quietly for a minute, his mouth opens once before he closes it again and just shakes his head in response before a small smile finds it's ways on his lips but the eyes tell another story, making it very obvious that he's faking the smile.

"Remember when I told you that I'm very generous when it comes to forgiving the people I love?" Harry slurs and I give him a confused look before nodding my head, realizing that he's trying to make me remember something from the past.

"I meant it." He whispers and I feel a lump starting to form in my throat, not sure of how to reply to his words.

What am I supposed to say anyway?  I can't tell him shit and make his condition even more worse. I can't be so cruel.

"I love you." Harry murmurs, his hand coming up to my face to wipe the tears away and I let out a sob, closing my eyes tightly to prevent the tears from falling.

I feel something extremely irritating, something that can't really be explained in words. It's not pain or hurt or sorrow, it's something more, a weird feeling can't I can not really decipher and It's making me want to cry.

Harry's bumps his nose against mine lightly, causing my eyes to fly open again. A little shriek escaping my mouth to see him this close. I hold my breath in anticipation, waiting for his lips to connect with mine but it never happens, instead Harry moves away and wraps both of his arms around me, bringing me flush against himself.