Coming Home

Lunch At Lolita's

Deyvon carefully pulled into the parking lot at Lolita's Cafe'. Cars and trucks there parked so close there is was like trying to wedge one more sardine in an already full can. He opened his door and slowly wedged himself out from between the cars. I laughed and unbuckled myself, sticking my hand out of the crack of my door as far as I could.

"Toss me the keys!", I yelled. He raised an eyebrow and shrugged, but did so anyways. I just barely caught them. I put them in the ignition and turned the truck on. I chewed on my toung, yet another one of my bad habits, and concentrated on finding the sunroof's button. "Aha!", I exclaimed. I pushed down the button and pulled the keys out. After the sunroof had opened up, I climbed out it and shimmed my way down the front of his truck.

He shook his had and hid a smile, "You really shouldn't do that to Bessy! She hates when you do that!".

I tossed him the keys and laughed. "And I hate when we park at Lolita's because I have to climb out that way or die. Bessy will live.", I said winking. He took my hand in his and we walked into the resturant and sat down at our regular booth.

After we ordered our lunch, Deyvon took both my hands in his. "Josie.. There's something I need to talk to you about..", he said softly.

I paniced and my heart began to race wildly. Had I done something wrong? Just tell me what I did, Dev.. I promise I'll try my hardest to fix it..

He traced the outlines of my hands with his thumbs and brought his lips to my hands, kissing them gently. "Josie.. I don't know how to tell you this. I know that we haven't ever actually made ourselves an item.. But I don't think it'd be such a good idea for us to be 'together' when I go off to basic..", he said slowly. His eyes searched mine, looking for some kind of comformation that what he had said was perfectly okay.

I began to tremble. I could feel the tears start to well up in the corners of my eyes. No, I wanted to say, Don't be like this, Dev. We can make it through this. I gently pulled my hands away from his. "Why, Dev? Do you think we can't do it?", I whispered shakily.

Fear grew deep in his eyes, "Did I ever say that? I just.. Josie. I've heard stories. That sometimes when people come back from basic, they aren't the same as they once were. I dont' want to come home and you be expecting the same boy that left. I wish I could tell you that that's exactly how it will happen, but I know that it won't, Josie. I'm so sorry, sweetheart.."

He reached for my hands, but I quickly withdrew them. I stood up from my chair, bumping into the one behind it and causing it to fall over. I set it back up started to walk away from the table. "Josie?", Deyvon called out. I ignored him and kept walking away, focusing on nothing but breathing, walking, and not crying. "Josie?!", he cried.

I just couldn't stop. I could hear the hurt and the tears staining his voice. I wanted to run back and wrap my arms around him. I wanted to stroke his hair and whisper to him that it was all going to be alright. I wanted him to run after me and tell me that he didn't know what he was saying. For him to tell me that he was truly crazy about me and what he said was just crack pot and he hadn't meant it.

The tinkling of the bells above the door, signaled to me that I had made it outside. I stopped for a moment and blinked, letting my eyes adjust to the light. I scanned the parking lot and saw a familar 1957 Starmist Blue Ford Thunderbird. I saw Lukas headed towards it and started over to him.

"Lukas?", I called out softly. He turned around and took in what a mess I was. My long, dark aburn hair had fallen out of it's French braid, leaving messy wild curls behind. My mascara had started to run leaving trails of black mess on my face, which made me realize that I had been crying. Lukas didn't say a word to me. He just nodded and opened the passenger door for me. I slid in and we drove off without any words.

When we got to Lukas's home, he led me to the back. He gestured to a bed in the back, "Lay down. You can stay the night here. I'm taking Heaven to concert, but I'll be back later. If you need anything, ring me.". I nodded and settled on the edge of the bed. I watched him gather a few things and leave.

The moment the front door shut, the tears started to fall. I laid back on the bed and cried. My tears staining the white sheets that had been put on the bed. I sobbed and shoved my hand in my mouth to keep from screaming. I slowly began to fall asleep, tears still sliding down my face as my eyes finally closed taking me into a dark, black Neverland.