Dearest His Words [Kohnnie]

5 - Alexs POV

A/N TRIGGER WARNING!!

I run out the school doors, fumbling with the pencil sharpener in hand. I sob. I can't get the blade out. I cut my finger trying. I don't care.

"FUCK YOU JOHNNIE!" I scream once I get to the tree line of the forest. I run straight for the creek.

"BEFORE WHAT?! BEFORE SHE CUTS HERSELF DEEP ENOUGH THAT SHE KILLS HERSELF!!? BEFORE SHE DROWNS HERSELF IN THE CREEK? BEFORE SHE JUMPS OF THE CLIFF NEAR THE CREEK AND FALLS TO HER DEATH?!" I hear someone yell once I make it to the creeks bridge. Johnnie....

"Why me? Why did he have to choose fucking Kyle over me? Oh I know why! Because I'm an ugly fuck. I'm surprised he even dated me in the first place!" I verbally beat myself up.

"SHUT UP!" I shout. I hear Johnnies voice inside my head.

"I love you my little wallflower. I won't ever leave you." His voice ringing through my head. That's the first words he said after he asked me to be his girlfriend. Lying shit. I sit down on the shore of the creek. I break the blade out if the pencil sharpener.

"A-Alex!!" I feel Johnnies hand on my shoulder. I drop the blade in the water. GOD DAMMIT! I heard his heavy panting in my ear.

"Fuck off..." I move my shoulder forcefully to get his hand off. "You better leave." I mumble.

"No. I'm not leaving. Not ever. Maybe we aren't dating anymore, but that doesn't change the fact that you are one of my best friends and I couldn't stand to see one of my best friends die!" Johnnie says, pulling me into his warm embrace.

Kyle comes into my line of view. "Alex. Please don't do it. I need you to stay. Like Johnnie said, your one of my best friends! You make me laugh when I want to cry. You make me smile even if I'm frowning. You just have to keep holding on. Because in the end it gets better. And if it's not better, then it's the end!" He hugs my neck because Johnnie is occupying my front.

I start crying even harder than I was before. We just sit there in a big hug puddle, crying.

All of a sudden I hear more footsteps. I don't bother to look up and neither do the boys.

"ALEX!" I hear a familiar Australian accent. Jordan Sweeto cares about me? I never talked to Jordan much. We had done a few MDE videos together and texted about MDE a few times but we never really talked face to face because he was always talking to Shannon or Kyle.

I look up at Jordan. "Go away." He shakes his head no.

"I'm not leaving. I never really talk to you and I always just walk past you in the halls and I've only done a few MDE videos with you. I never got to know you. That would be one of the MANY things I would regret if you died." He sighed joining the hug puddle.

More footsteps.

"Guys? GUYS!" I hear Shannon yell. She was also panting like everyone else that came.

I look back up. I see Jeydon and Bryan standing near Shannon, tears wetting there eyes.

"I need to leave." I stand up and walk towards the bridge. I need to leave this world. I step up onto the wooden railing.

"NO!" I hear Johnnie and Kyle shout at the same time.

Yes.

I feel arms on my waist pulling me down.

"You're not leaving! Please stay little wallflower." Johnnie sobs onto my back after pulling me off the railing.

I cry shoving Johnnie off and running to the cliff. "DONT STOP ME."

"ALEX." I hear Shannon yell. "Listen to me! I love you and I need you to see that! Maybe I was the last one here but I would change that if I could!" I hear Shannon's shakes cries.

(A/n sorta rushed into some Shalex biz but whatever)

I stop at the edge. I look down backing up running into Shannon. "You don't love me." I whisper.

"Yes I do." She whispers back.

"AWE!" Jordan coos. This day is getting better. I've always kinda liked Shannon. Her blue and black hair, just like mine, her angel bites, her eyes and smile. Her-her everything.

"Maybe I can stay." I close my eyes hugging Shannon. Shannon pulls me closer. "Let's go to Hot Topic."

"BAND TEES!" Johnnie yells, excitedly.

I giggle. Shannon starts giggling with me. We all start laughing as we walk out of the woods and into the streets.