f i v e
"get ovr the fockin fence now b4 we gt cauht." I said from the other side
"ok m8 find ur chill."
"omfg quickly. Dave is already on my case."
Once da squad was ovr da fence we walked into da tour bus.
It was messy af.
We stuck jack hemmings picyures around the bus and vandalised da bus
I walked ova to lukes bunkbed and found out that he had a shrine of me in his bunkbed.
10 pictures of me
My merch
A cushion with my face on it
"oh my hemmo." I breathed
"Wht?" bella said
"Oh my god take a picture." Ell said
"what a creep" Pandora said
"He's -." Nat was interrupted
"-what the fuck are you doing in here." Calum said
"Hey daddy." Pandora whispered
"hey babe." Calum winked at Pandora "Wait so what are u doing here?"
"we um-"
"We are looking for jack." I said
"Oh. I saw him walking around with a girl a few miutes ago." Calum replied
I bought out my rifle and said "bitch where."
"woah there lucifer" Calum brought up his hands in surrender
The tourbus door opened
"who called me?" Luke said. I put my rifle away. Lukes eyes landed on me. "Oh hey colleen."
"You're a creep."
Luke shat his pants wen he realised he fucked up
"Yeah he really is. I mean the dude writes fanfics abt u." Michelle Obama said
"Yeah he does." Ashton chimed in
"not to mention the smut. That shit is detailed" Calum nodded in agreement
Obama nodded
RJ nodded
Liz nodded
Andy nodded
Ben nodded
Molly nodded
Dave nodded
Karen nodded
Harry styles nodded
Jackie chan nodded
Kanye West-Indian nodded
Jesus nodded
"I do not." Luke lied
"why the fuck you lyinnnnn."
The tourbus door opened again
"hey boo." Artichoke said running into lukes arm
"what now."
"I want to hear you sing."
"okay what song?"
"money. Like the start of the chorus."
"okay. take my money, take my keys-" Luke sang
Architecture slipped her hands into lukes pockts and took his money and his soul.
Luke died.
he dead
"whoop der it is." Michelle said as she started at luke
Iggy started signing "I got one less problem without ya." Lookin down at luke and rode away to Narnia.
Ashton the preist then took out his bible and said
"we are gathered here today to celebrate the life of jack hemmings 2.0."
"okay tru." I said wiping a tear
Michelle wrapped me around his finger and said "now that hes gone I wont have to tell him to shut up."
"ur a prick." Nat said cryin. She cried so much that she turnd in2 Niagara falls like Mackenzie falls.
"guys why the fuck you cryinnnnnnn why u always cryinnnnnn mhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhoooohhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmyyyyyyyygod stop fuckin cryin." Luke said rising up like jesus did
"shut up." michelle Obama said
-
Suddenly we r now in a vent
"wht r we gonna do?" emma said who I forgot abt lol
"idk kill ourselves."
Nat said we should try and get in da arena wen ders a fookin hallway that leads to da arena
"m8 dis is fooked up."
"nat r u donnald trump? Y did u do dis to us."
"ok guys shut up." I said
"ppl can hear us ."
We kep crwlin thru da vent
Until da vent broke.
Well fookin hell
Naughty boy weren't w/ us so y did It brake
Ellena fell
I looked down
We were at da belechers anyway so im cool
I jumped down
"its empty."
"so we can go and fuck w/ the stage layout."
"I ran to the stage and walked up da stairs
I went to ashtonions drums and got his drumsticks and used dem as chopsticks to eat my noodles dat Jackie chan gave to me.
As I opened my mouth I heard lukes voice.
"what are you doing ? are u really gonna eat me!"
"oh shit luke wtf."
"im a noodle..? u should know dat."
"ok tru." I put down da noodle
"thanks brah."
Da noodles started walking away
Bye Felicia
