My Dear Lieutenant

Chapter 6

      I heard giggling as I ran down the stairs. Shane was looking through the fridge, but turned around when he heard it too. Upon seeing five little girls at the dinner table, covering their mouths as they laughed, he hid behind the fridge door.

      "Lulu, can I see you in the family room?" he asked. My youngest sister got up from her seat, leaving her fellow Fireflies at the table. I followed her into the family room, seeing Shane waiting for us. "Who are those people?"

     "My troops," she answered simply. He looked at her, waiting for her to elaborate. I spoke up.

     "It's Monday. Monday, Wednesday, and Saturday are troop nights for the Fireflies."

     "Alright, get rid of them," he demanded.

     "I can't. Everybody's parents go out on troop nights and they won't be back until eight," Lulu responded.

     "Mom's their den mother," I explained.

     Shane leaned on the wall and looked out at the girls as he spoke, "You better tell your little friends that they have to..." he trailed off as the giggling started up again. Shane quickly picked up Lulu's stuffed gorilla, holding it against his chest so that the girls wouldn't see it.

     "Today we're supposed to sell cookies," Lulu informed him, shrugging her shoulders.

     "I don't do cookies," Shane replied, "Can't Mae do it?"

     A slight smile appeared on my lips when he called me Mae instead of Red One. "I can't do it alone. If they don't sell enough cookies, they can't go to the Jamboree," I told him.

     Lulu sent him a pleading look. Shane glanced at the table full of girl scouts, who began to wave at him.

     "They're waving at me," he whispered.

     "Gee, I wonder why," I replied sarcastically, laughing as I headed back to the kitchen. Shane ran up the stairs, then returned in a few minutes, fully clothed. I sat down at the table with Lulu and the Fireflies, waiting for him to speak. I may have been an adult and all, but I knew how Shane liked to be in charge of the situation.

     "Alright, ladies!" Shane announced, "Here's how it's going to be. Tonight, I'm your den mother. That means if you want to live to see tomorrow, you do exactly as I say. Do we understand each other?" he asked, as though these little girls were soldiers instead of girl scouts.

     "Den mother, you frighten me," one of the girls spoke up.

     Shane leaned towards her, "Good. Now, let's move out!"

     Finding the situation hilarious, I sent Shane a mock salute, "Sir, yes sir!"

     After helping the girls pack the boxes of cookies into the trunk and strapping Tyler and Peter in, I got into the passenger seat and buckled up. Shane soon opened the driver's door and got in, too. Thankfully, the ride to Costco was a smooth one.

     The girls began to set up their table of cookies, while I carried Tyler and pulled Shane, who had Peter in a holder on his back, into the store.

     "I need to get a few groceries. Would you mind helping me?" I asked, grabbing a cart. He shook his head silently. I handed Tyler to him, then took Peter out of the strap on seat and placed him in the cart. Taking Tyler back from Shane, I began to lead the way, leaving the lieutenant to push the cart.

     It didn't take us long to get the groceries, and soon we were at the check out. Behind the cashier, I saw the TVs that showed the view of the security cameras. Everything seemed to be fine with the girls. However, when we got out of Costco a few minutes later, it seemed to be the opposite. Several little boys in scout uniforms were trashing the table and smashing the cookies.

     Shane's device began to go off, signalling that one of my siblings had pressed the emergency button. Shane walked quickly in the direction of the van, leaving me to follow. Lulu and the other scouts were hiding behind the vehicle. I kneeled down in front of my sister and looked her over for any sign of injury. All I saw was a missing necktie.

     "Are you alright, girls?" I asked as Lulu hugged me.

     "What happened?" Shane inquired.

     Lulu released me, "Those boys over there broke our cookies."

     "Broke your cookies?" he repeated. My sister nodded. "Lulu, this is not a toy. Forget those boys. I am here to protect you, not cookies. Understand?"

     "Shane," I interrupted. She's a little girl and she was scared. Go easy on her," I told him, standing up. He looked at me, then sighed.

     "Get in the car. We're all going home," Shane told the girls, opening the trunk.

     "Wait, you can't take us home yet," one of the Fireflies spoke up," You're supposed to take us to get something to eat."

     "Where do you usually go?"

     When we stepped into the building, we were greeted by three employees. The one in the middle had a metal mouth piece.

     "Welcome to Woody Woodchuck's!" he said enthusiastically. Lulu and the Fireflies scattered immediately, but Shane and I, holding Peter and Tyler, stayed still for a moment, taking it all in. I had never been there before, and the mass of screaming children was quite overwhelming.

     "And they say war is Hell," Shane muttered, looking around.

     Needless to say, it was a loud, fast-paced evening. The girls seemed to have fun, though.

     While we were driving home, I leaned my head against the headrest, closing my eyes. The girls were singing some scouts tune, and it wasn't helping my current headache. I didn't want to spoil their fun though. I felt like I was being watched, so I reopened my eyes and looked to my left, where I found Shane glancing at me.

     "Everything alright?" he asked.

     "Yeah, it's just been a hectic night. Between trying to get the girls corralled and watching Tyler and Peter..." I trailed off, thinking. I turned around and saw an empty car seat. "Oh my god, I forgot Peter!"

     At once, the vehicle sharply turned, causing the girls to stop singing. They began to scream as the van seemed to momentarily be on two wheels.

     As soon as we made it back to Woody Woodchucks, we headed towards the ball pit. The worker with the mouth piece was standing there, as if he was waiting for our return.

     "I sorta figured you'd come back for him," the man shrugged. Shane handed Tyler, who was in his carrier, to me, while he stepped up to the entrance of the ball pit.

     "Inexcusable. I've never left a man behind," he said, reaching into the pit to retrieve Peter.

     "Oh, relax. Once we found a kid in the ball pool when we opened in the morning," the employee told us. When Peter was lifted out of the ball pool, naked from the waist down. "Whoa, whoa. Not cool! Uh, there's no free styling in the ball pool!"

     Shane held Peter out to the worker, while the girls began to giggle. Hesitantly, the man took Peter. As soon as he was out of Shane's hands, he dived into the ball pit to get Peter's bottoms.

     "Should we send someone in after him?" Lulu asked after a moment.

     A second later, Shane resurfaced with Peter's pants and diaper. As soon as the girls saw the latter, they ran away, screaming. Seeing the look on the lieutenant's face, I let out a chuckle.

     "Not used to this kind of duty yet, are you, Lieutenant?"

     By the time we dropped off all of the girls and got home, it was about nine-thirty. When we pulled up beside the house, my eyes nearly popped out of my head. Loud music was playing from the house and there were dozens of teenagers on the front lawn, walking all over Mom's flowers.