Bullet To The Heart |ManXMan| [PREVIEW]

Dreams Like a Warrior

José ^^

Sorry it took almost two weeks to get this up, but i have t be in such a weird mood to write this lol, This is dedicated to @MrtvyCasomeric because i feel sorry that it's so hot there and i give them fuzziness with my baby boys.

"You're so beautiful" Jose hummed, just waking up from a  deep slumber, light streamed across his caramel skin as he wrapped his arms around his lover's chest and placed a soft kiss in between Elliot's shoulder blades, "please don't get out of bed"

"The home will notice i'm gone"

"Come live with me Ellie, i wouldn't adopt but you are 17, can't you just get out?"

"Not until i turn 18"

"Please, just a few more hours, please baby! c'mon you can't leave me here all cold"

"When are you sending in your application?" Elliot clasped his hands together.

"I'm waiting until you're out of high school, we talked about this, we either go together or not at all"

"then let's not go"

"i thought you wanted to"

"I do" Elliot sighed and looked back at Jose, his black hair was in curly tangles and his naked body was hidden under gray sheets and a white comforter, "i do but..."

"What if we don't make it?"

"Honestly i'd be fine with dying, i mean no one here wants or needs me but what if you die, or i die and the other is just left alone"

"I will never leave you alone Elliot, i love you so much, even if i do die i will always be by your side, i will hold your hand when you get shots, and i will go to the dentist with you, and you can drag me to Sunday morning farmers markets, and we'll celebrate Christmas with my family, and we'll dress out kids in bumble bee costumes, even if one of us isn't there, we will always be with each other"

"I'm scared"

Jose sat up and sighed, he ran a hand through his mop of dark curls and cracked his knuckles, He scooted forwards and nuzzled his chin into the crook of Elliot's neck, his slightly younger lover's, neck.

"Don't be" he whispered and reached over to grab the stuffed polar bear he had won for Elliot at the street fair, "if i'm gone then just hold onto this guy at night, I've put my heart and about 30 dollars winning him, just for you, okay baby?"

Elliot sniffled and choked back a sob, it always made him cry thinking about what could happen over seas, where him and Jose were headed in about a year. Jose frowned and pressed feather soft kisses to his lover's neck and hair, trying to bring him any sense of comfort.

Jose had and idea and backed away from his boyfriend, who was cradling the stuffed polar bear in his tan and well built arms. Jose unclasped the chain from around his neck and held the silver cross in his hands, it was something he had found when he visited Spain as a young child,m it was lying next to a pink rose on the side of  a fountain, he picked it up the week before he met Elliot in kindergarten, he had never taken it off, until this day. He looped it around Elliot's neck and closed the clasp again.

"This is a big part of me, it lead me to you, so now you will always have me with you, because the love i have for you, mean even heaven isn't big enough to hold the love i have for you"

Ring Ring Ring Ring

Elliot opened his eyes, his hand was wrapped numbly around the silver cross nestled in between his pecs and his body was covered in a light film of sweat, his breathing was heavy but he rubbed his eyes and turned his head, looking to his phone that was ringing.

He slammed his hand on the phone and groaned. Randy. It read his name and Elliot sat up, wiping the sweat off his face to answer.

"hello?" Elliot was met with his own raspy and wavering voice.

"Elliot are you okay?"

"Yeah" Elliot sighed.

"Please don't lie to me or yourself Elliot, i can practically hear the panic, what's wrong?"

"You're too smart" Elliot shook his head, "just a bad dream"

"About Jose?"

"Yeah..."

"Oh Elliot i'm sorry"

"My dreams aren't your fault Randy" Elliot snickered, the little country boy always managed to smile, "i bought my ticket"

"You did?"

"Yep, in a little under a week we'll be able to see each other face to face"

"i am so excited to be honest" Randy blushed on his side of the phone and bit into his plump lower lip.

"I am too, i'm happy to get away from work"

"To work more" Randy scoffed and grinned ear-to-ear.

"Yeah but you're fun, my office job sucks"

"Do you have to go to that soon?"

"Yeah, i should get ready"

"Then i will see you later" Randy cooed.

"Of course little bird, i'll text you when i'm off of work"

"Bye Teddy"

Randy hung up and Elliot placed his phone on his bed slowly. He brought a hand up to the cross and let his fingers linger on the cool metal, it brought him chills. His body began to shake and he sniffled and ran his free hand through his hair.

"Fuck you Jose" he muttered and rolled up into a ball, burying his face in the sheets, "just fuck you and your damn hero complex"

The tears were quick, painless but the thoughts running through Elliot's head, they were sharp like daggers being thrown at his heart.

why didn't i stop him?

Why didn't i go first?

If i had told him, not to go he wouldn't have, we could have gotten real jobs here and lived happily ever after.

I want to die.

I need to be with him.

His phone dinged and he slapped it into the mattress but curled his fingers around it and pulled it to his chest, he looked at it. A message from randy popped up.

If you need to hold on to someone while you sleep here then my bed is plenty big, remember to smile today. ~Birdy xoxo