Shift

Wake

The second I wake up is the second I want to pass out again.

Everything hurts. I'm stiff, sore, and half of my body is covered in bandages. Even Healers have limits. There's only so much they can do to physical injuries, and even less they can do for pure tiredness. I had completely exhausted my body in that fight, and I'm paying for it now.

It takes extreme willpower just to open my eyes. As soon as I do, I recognize where I am. Faded designs and mysterious stains liter my bedroom wall, disturbed only by Lionel-shaped indents (courtesy of one Verin, who doesn't take kindly to conversations during study times). An old wooden desk sits in the corner, two cups and a water pitcher sitting on top. The only thing that's different is one rickety chair, and I know exactly where that's been moved to.

I carefully tilt my head to confirm my suspicion. A brief smile comes to my face. Verin's head is resting near my right hand, and a thin trail of drool escapes her mouth in between snores. Technically, I should be in my Full Mentor's residence until I can afford to buy my own house. I'm not suprised that I'm still with Verin, though. She would have fought tooth and nail to keep me here until I'm healed.

I raise my arm enough to hit her on the head. It still hurts to raise my arm, since it's the one that just got broken, but seeing the ever-graceful Verin fall backwards out of the chair is well worth it. I laugh at her, which causes me to cringe.

"Idiot," Verin grumbles from the floor. Her eyes peer over the edge of the bed, but they aren't angry. At least, not too angry. "You know, a girl in your condition shouldn't be so reckless. I could've accidentally killed you."

"Only if you acted on your instinct. Which you didn't," I remind her. "Can I have some water?"

Verin gets up off the ground and pours water into one of the cups on the desk. I carefully sit up, and through my body protests, none of my wounds reopen. Verin hands me the cup, and I down the murky water.

Verin picks the chair up off the floor, but doesn't sit down. Instead, she stands by the bed and crosses her arms. I can hear her tap her foot on the ground. Verin only does that when she's angry or stressed. Since Lionel isn't in the room, there's no reason for her to be upset.

"Calm down," I tell her. "I passed Initiation, right? It won't be long until I'm at an equal standing with you and Lionel. I'm getting closer to my goal every day."

"I know," she replies simply. "I'm just worried about what it will take to get you there."

She sits down and puts her head in her hands, her foot still tapping. I stay quiet. I can't tell her that nothing will happen, because I can't guarantee that something won't. I can't tell her I'll be safe, because I'll do whatever it takes to reach my goal. I know better than to fill people with false hope.

Several minutes pass in silence. I take sips from my cup, and Verin sits in thought. I can hear Marked going through their daily routines: weapons training, Mark training, agility, cooking, stealth. Whatever an upcoming Member might need to know and everything required to pass Initiation.

"How long until I'm moved?" I ask. Verin lifts her head and gives me a weary smile.

"I have you until dusk. Then he's going to send some men to get you, whether you're ready to move or not. I tried to let them keep you here, but..." Verin shakes her head. "They wouldn't let me. One day, that's the rule. They won't bend it."

I reach to play with my hair, but find only air. Sighing, I put my hand back down. That habit is broken, whether I want it to be or not. So much has changed beyond my control. It was inevitable that some of my habits would be affected as well.

"How much longer?"

"Two hours, tops. Definitely less than you need."

I shake my head. "Two hours will have to be enough. Help me get up."

Verin gets out of the chair and clasps her arm on mine. I carefully swing my legs towards the edge of the bed. I nod at Verin, and she helps pull me to my feet. She lets me lean on her for support.

"Can you stand by yourself?" she asks. I take a set away from her and promptly fall. Luckily, I manage to catch myself on the bed, so I'm able to pull myself back up. Verin moves to support me again, but I wave her away. I need to do this by myself.

More than half an hour and several attempts later, I manage to not only stand, but walk all the way across the room. My legs are starting to gain strength back, and the more I move, the less stiff I am.

Another hour later, I'm finally able to move halfway freely. I still hurt, and my new scars are tight and restrict my movement, but I'm in as good of shape as I will be until my body fully heals itself. I ask Verin to leave, something she isn't happy about. It's only after I promise not to leave via the second story window, my usual exit, that she reluctantly leaves.

When I'm alone, I take a deep breath and take a good look around my room. I've only been here for three months, but this has almost become a home. Lionel and Verin had welcomed me here in a time when I didn't want to let anyone in, let alone let them get close. Yet I let them in, and now they're the closest thing to friends I have. I have built something here.

And now I have to leave it all.

I change into my spare set of everyday clothes and leave my old ones on the floor. My other set were destroyed completely at Initiation, though the scraps would probably be reused for something. My training clothes and more formal dress get thrown into an old burlap bag. I carefully remove a thin, red book from a secret drawer on the desk.

The door opens, and Lionel walks straight into my room. He is smiling like usual, but he's playing with a belt at his waist. Verin is behind him, hand on her hip. She looks a little less stressed, but her foot is still tapping on the floor.

Lionel gestures to the book in my hands. "Her's?"

I nod. Gently, I wrap the book in its clean linen cloth and nestle it between my other clothes. Lionel and Verin don't ask what's inside, and I don't tell them. Some things are better hidden.

There's a loud knock on the door downstairs. Verin runs across the room and gives me a quick hug, then races out of the room. Lionel isn't far behind, his hug just as quick as Verin's. If they are found in my room, rumors will start to spread like wildfire, and I have enough rumors around me as it is.

I barely get my bag on my back before three figures block the doorway. They are all male, and I recognize none of them. One steps forward, shorter thab the rest with blond hair and blue eyes. He looks about my age, but he stands as rigid as a soldier three times his age.

"Miss Blackwood, I'm glad to see you're awake," he says, warning away the other men. "That saves us all of the time it would have taken to carry you."

"I'm honored to be of assistance," I reply.

"Don't be, Miss Blackwood. We need to keep on schedule if we want to arrive by nightfall, per your Full Mentor's request."

I walk out of the room and shut the door behind me. No time to look to the past now. No time for regrets.

"Then let's go."