Looking for something to bring me out of the darkness...

I'm Free?

Today is the day when i can go home, My parents haven't come to see me for the whole time i've been in here. I go to school tomorrow, but i don't think i'm going to go... I'm not ready for that yet, I need a break from people, I can't handle horrible remarks today. Plus I don't think I'll be hanging out with Vic because of- well... That... I feel quite awkward actually, I mean... I think of him as a friend and nothing more, I think he just needed to feel better, and maybe that was something to help him cope... I guess. I don't even know. But I'm not going to question it. I'm just going to try and act like it never happened. I mean... It was more like a friendly kiss, like what girls do, that's normal right?

Anyway. I get to leave here in a few hours and I still haven't seen Vic yet, he'd usually be here already just waiting for me to get up... I kind of miss having someone to talk to, I haven't seen him for the last few days.

~later~

I was just about to leave when I heard a voice coming from behind me. "KELLIN! KELLIN QUINN WAIT!" I turned to see a nurse, one that I had become quite friendly with when I was in her care for the first couple of days I was in there. "What's the matter Martha?" I asked.  "It's your friend, the one that came to see you when you were in here... He- he's been admitted for a suspected suicide attempt-" I cut her off.
"Where is he?" She looked at me sadly.
"He's- argh I will just take you there, come with me Kellin"
She took me back into the hospital and down a plain white corridor, through a pair of double doors and down another corridor similar to the one I was in accept I was in the other side of the building. She stopped outside a room with no window or anything on the door so you couldn't see in... Or out...
"He's in here" she opened the door and I walked in slowly, bracing myself for what I was about to see.

He was covered in bandages, in both his arms, and from what I could see, his legs too. I walked over and saw that he was awake.
"Kellin?" He questioned.
"Vic? Why? Just why?" I asked apologetically.
"They too you huh?" He chucked... Why was he laughing?
"Why did you try to kill yourself Vic?" I asked harshly.
"Why did you try and kill yourself Kellin?" He asked white force as he sat up and looked me in the eyes.
"I don't belong in this world Vic, I'm a failure, everyone hates me and everyone leaves me at some point..."
I choked and my eyes were starting to full with tears. Vic brought his hand up to my face and wiped the small tears which were unknowingly escaping my swollen eyes.
"Kellin, you aren't a failure, and I'm sure not everyone leaves you." He said solemnly.
"They all do, eventually. And you're a prime example. You were ready to leave me. I know I've only known you for a week, but I feel like I've known you all my life. And seeing you here just made me feel 10 times worse about myself!" More tears were trailing down my face, causing it to become cold.
He looked sad. "I'm sorry Kellin, I really am. I don't know what came over me. It's just... After I kissed you" he sighed. "I went back home, and Danielle was gone, like she said she would be... And I just spent the next two days moping around and crying because I just lost the love of my life and... And I was falling for someone who would never live me back... Everything just hit me really hard and I don't know how to deal with it. I didn't intend to hurt you Kellin, I seriously didn't... I promise to never hurt you again." I looked into his eyes. "It's okay, I believe you Vic" I engulfed him in a hug.. "It's okay, I'm here, I'm gonna help you. I promised. And I don't break my promises" "thank you" Vic said.

The next few hours were filled with laughter and more embarrassing stories from our childhoods.
Until it reached 7pm.
Visiting times were over, but I didn't want To leave Vic.
Martha came in and brought me a blanket and pillow and said she knew I would want to stay so she got me a visitors pass and said I was allowed to stay until Vic got released in a few days.  I happily took the opportunity. Anything to be there for my friend.

It's quite weird when I think about it... A few hours ago I was released from here... And now I'm back... Only to stay for even longer. I hope Vic gets better soon. I'm starting to get sick of the hospital.