Making A New Mark

Chapter 6-Steph.

Stephinie is a beautiful 17 year old girl. She has bright pink hair that flows to her shoulders in perfect waves. She has light sky blue eyes that have small specks of black in them when you look closely. She is short and curvy with full pale pink lips and dimples that showed when she smiled so brightly the sky could light up. She finds herself in a depressed state of mind a lot more than she pleased. She has light purple faded scars up her arms from where she'd attempted giving up.

I hate this feeling. The feeling of wanted to drag a blade into my skin but not being able to bleed. I hate being cold all the time. Let me tell you what I love. I love being numb all the time and only being able to be connected to only one person. Knowing who you are going to be with forever. I love not having to make choices because I stop stressing. I love moving so fast the world spins out of control. I love being so strong that I feel unstoppable, it's the only time I don't feel like a fuck up...and that's what I love. 

I spoke alone in my room. That's an often thing....being alone.

My room is dark and dull, posters everywhere covering ever bit of the perfect white paint on the walls. Lights hung around that brought life to my music. I'm a dj. I have my tables set up in the darkest corner of the room. The lights in the other parts of the room seem to dance with the notes on the staff while I play a new song or just play any music at all. It's nice to block out the world. Well everyone except the rest of me. I love them all though. I really do. 

I always have to wait for hours on Alex to pick me up. I don't really find myself with Alex though. I'm in love with Kenyon. He completes me...makes me feel alive when I know I'm not. Not really. He is amazing. Of course I'm one of his 'childeren' I'll never be with him. Knowing that hurts me. 

*ring ring*

My phone rang as I smiled and picked it up I heard such a lovely voice on the other end. "Hello stunning, I figured I'd take you out today. Maybe to the river or we could go jumping and climbing?" "That sounds great hun. 7:00?" I sighed in relief at the sound of his voice. "See you then. Oh and hey...I love you." "See you then love. Bye." I wasn't thinking.

What if he hates me? Why didn't you say it back!? You fuck up! I ran to the bathroom and hit the mirror shattering it into pieces. Damn it! I picked up a shard of glass and digging it deep into my skin in many places. My skin opened up releaving small a drop of blood but it cleared up when the wound healed itself. 

I screamed in rage and throw a brush at the wall leaving a huge hole in the wall. Thank god I got that out of my system. I'm going to say it to him tonight. It's fine. I'll fix this all, I swear. I told myself with raging red eyes calming myself and pulling the blue back in them. 

I pulled my hair back into a ponytail and pulling my bangs to one side of my face. I placed a light conceler on my face and lightened the dark circles under my eyes. I drank a bag and then damped bright red lipstick on. I pulled on a small black rosey dress and a pair of slip on toms. 

7:00 thank god, I said looking at my clock and running downstairs. I smiled when I saw his car outside. Just on time. I ran outside and jumped in his arms. Him spinning me around I placed a kiss on his lips and said quietly, "I love you too." He smiled setting me down and god that smile drived me crazy. Is is possible to love two people? Or is Kenyon just a phase? I feel perfect when I'm around him my heart beats a little faster. God. He's great.