Morituri te Salutamus

Chapter 3

Innoxias (Harmless)

LAMB TO THE SLAUGHTER

Third in Line 

Possibly the only thing anyone cared about in Westgate was getting out of Westgate. You may think I'm exaggerating, but I'm not. Sure, people seemed happy here, but after two of the local teenagers had mysteriously died, it was losing its cool and hippie vibes. If you wanted to run away, you had to go twenty miles in any direction just to find another gas station to fill up your car. It seemed like everyone was busy thinking about something whenever you needed to talk. Why they never heard my screams, we'll never know.

I was known for my naturally striking blonde hair and hazel eyes, and my attractive figure. My aura is gold. Boyfriends came and went, floating past. Half the time I was never interested in any of them. Just something to distract me from family. My parents were divorced, leaving me with a controlling mother and mid-20's brother who had been off his meds for months. Perhaps I would've seen it coming if I wasn't so blindly innocent (by choice). But this world only contains "What Ifs" and "I Could've. . .", so it's redundant even telling you the obvious; I was foolish.

Alan, my brother, was having a party at our house while my mother was out of town. He managed to convince me to stick around and hang out. Biggest. Mistake. Ever. Eventually the party was filled with stoned and drunk people stumbling around our run-down house. I went upstairs to lie down for a while, but unfortunately my room was 'taken'. The evening went smoothly, until I was forced to go to the store to buy more liquor with some of the guys. None of them could drive, obviously, being intoxicated and all, so I had to drive with seventy-five percent of a full driver's license.

We got to the store's door. They all went in while I waited outside. Crickets started to chirp and my eyes felt heavy. The sky's once bright features had faded into night as I drifted off into a trance. The sudden slam of car doors jolted me awake. Their husky voices demanded to see Alan and his buddies. Before I could react, they drew a pistol on me and pointed it at my forehead. My lips tried to communicate, but all I could do was point at the door. Two of them rushed in and the sound of gunshots echoed inside the building. I could've run at the chance. I don't know why I didn't.

Instead, I made the pathetic decision to attack the person with the gun. No chance of winning with flailing arms. I'll spare you the details of how it went down, but I think you can guess. Right through the heart. All I remember is I was on the ground, and someone's tears were splattering in my face. Shortly after that, Oblitus was introducing me to Tenebris and explaining the Awakening.

It's not so painful thinking about it now. I mean, it's in the past, right? Honestly, sometimes when I'm alone, I still feel the bullet lodged in my chest. I've always been the victim, more times pretending than reality, but it was then I realized I couldn't change my circumstance. Donning terms or phrases from English isn't my favorite, but I sometimes like calling myself a lamb led to slaughter. I had no idea deciding to stay at home that night would result in my death. Most people don't expect simple choices to turn out like a butterfly effect, when one little choice echoes to affect all others.

Sometimes I feel all seven of us are closer than I was with my family. Maybe that's a good thing. But most of the time, I can't help but feel guilty for never telling my mother good-bye when she left. Found out she died of a heart attack. You never know when your hug will be your last. Potentially, I guess you should savor every good situation, since you're obviously not guaranteed another one. Too bad I was too innocent yet to realize that at age seventeen. At that age, everyone assumes it's granted you'll live to seventy-nine and have so many grandkids you don't remember their names, a 'happily ever after type' thing. Who would've known how far off our guesses of the afterlife were.

To tell you the least, the theories of "spirits walking among us" wasn't too far off. The Awakened have two general areas they can roam listlessly in: first, the human world. Some choose to torment their relatives, or haunt their favorite sights. Most of the time they just watch their family and friends go on with their daily lives. Second, is the Refuge. The landscape is desolate, colorless, filled with every shade of neutral color you could imagine. Awakened who find it too hard to continue existing with recognizable faces usually drone around here. I, honestly, spend time here to get away from the chaos on Earth. It's like a dream-scape, but drowned out from color. Occasionally I'll see Tenebris here, but the one person who used to spend the most time here, she's, well . . . that's not my story to tell. It's not that you shouldn't know; you're just not ready. At least, that's what Oblitus told me.

Memories of the real world have disintegrated into faded negatives, but I remember reading obituaries in the newspaper of teenagers dying. I wonder if Tenebris and Oblitus were some of the ones I saw. Then again, it wouldn't matter now. So many people were dying back then, I couldn't pin-point exactly who they were. But I can guarantee, none of us were strangers when we were rejoined in the Refuge.