Wrong Number

Murder and Cheating Sisters

Jason:
Murder, eh?

:Piper
You motherfucker.

Nice way to put it, bastard

Jason:
Sorry, Piper. Living on caffeine, adrenaline from my run, and determination to finish my social studies essay by tonight. Due tomorrow. 2/10 paragraphs done. When did I become such a procrastinator?

:Piper
How the fuck should I know? I don't even know what you look like, but you could probably give me a ten page description on how I look. Before and after getting arrested

Jason:
...maybe?

:Piper
Oh my God

Stalker

Fuck off, I've had enough stalkers in my lifetime. I wouldn't be surprised if the whole "wrong number" thing was a ploy to get close to me so you can pawn off my money and sleep with me or something

Jason:
Ummm... I'm not a stalker, I'm interested in someone, and I was looking you up because you refused to give me details on why you are in reform school.

:Piper
Look

The murder was just me saving a friend's ass

He was injured and stupid and terrified, I needed to help him, so I was blamed. He was using his sword "Riptide" that his cousin Zoë gave him, so I jumped in, smeared the dude's blood all over my hands and my Swiss Army knife "Katoptris" and took the fall

Jason:
You name your weapons?

:Piper
Wow, you're weird.

I tell you the story of how I got blamed for murder and that's all you can come up with?

Jason:
Murder is sensitive to me. My mom was murdered by my dad. He didn't get blamed though, the jackass. Instead, some sweet, innocent girl from my school was accused. Silena Beauregard. The murder of the starlet Beryl Grace? I'm sure you've heard of it.

:Piper
'Course I did.

I can't believe you just told me that

Let's move onto something else, now plz?

Jason:
Ever walk out of a movie theater during the daytime and you feel like a fucking vampire, the sun's so bright?

:Piper
Yeah... Why?

Jason:
My sister walked out of a horror movie and started screaming when the sunlight hit her. She practically collapsed in the parking lot and was sobbing. 😂😂😂 It was fucking hilarious.

:Piper
Oh my god... You're a horrible brother... 😂😂😂

Jason:
Well, she's a horrible best friend.

:Piper
Really? Tell me bout her

Jason:
She

My best girl friend (Annabeth) walked in on my sister Thalia and Annabeth's boyfriend sleeping with each other. Thalia even had the nerve to go up to her and say she forgave Annabeth.

When I accidentally texted you, it was apology to Annabeth for not believing her.

:Piper
Oh. Sorry.

Dammit, gotta go. Nice talking to us Sparky

Jason:
Sparky?

Wait, where did that originate from?

Piper?

Piper!

DAMMIT PIPER