Paper Hearts (boyxboy)

The Break Up

I never thought I'd be in this position. I always knew I was different than the other kids on the playground, but I never saw myself as the "gay type." I mean look at me, I'm a star football player, I've dated every pretty girl in town, I'm just like the rest of the popular jocks in school... except none of the other jocks make out with boys. The issue is, I have an image to protect. I can't be walking around the halls, holding hands with another dude, what would everyone think? How could they ever understand, if I don't even understand?

With all this, I'm walking a thin line. I managed to evade Carly for the past two days since... Andrew. I don't really know what to call it, but you don't call it nothing when you sneak a peck in the bathroom with no one looking, or skip practice just to make out behind the hickories by the lake. You also don't call it dating, if your supposed-to-be ex-girlfriend is telling people that you guys are just having a fight. I thought the Carly thing was over, but I must have underestimated her. She's been trying to get to me after every class, it's getting harder and harder to avoid. At some point I'm just gonna skip school.

I look over at Andrew, eating lunch quietly. "Hey man, you think I should stop ignoring Carly?" I chime casually.

He looks up from his sandwich. "Oh hell yeah. You should definitely talk to her. Talk, argue, say things you don't mean. Then dump that nasty hoe!"

I laugh. Everyone else at the lunch table gives him a confused look, but they just keep eating. "Nasty hoe, huh? That's a little harsh."

He smiles sweetly. Almost as if on cue, Carly comes sprinting in, whipping her head in every direction. "Speak of the devil." Andrew mumbles.

Before I can even process that I should be running, she's spotted me and is sprinting towards the table. "Noah!"

Oh shit, should've gone to McDonald's. "What are you doing here baby? It's not your lunch period." I breathe, trying to sound calm as she gets to the table.

"Oh no, asshole! None of that 'baby' bologna! You've been ignoring me com--" She cuts herself off, gripping my shoulders and bringing her eyes up to my collar. "What the hell is that?" She nearly screams.

Andrew looks straight up, his eyes wide. God, I forgot I had gotten that! "Umm, definitely not a hickey," I blurt out. Oh god I am an idiot.

"Oh my god you fuc... Who is it? Who is the disgusting whore you've been cheating on my with? Huh! I swear to god I will murder her!"

Andrew looks like he can't breathe. "Um, I'm gonna go...get some chips..." He gets up abruptly. My eyes can't help but wander on over to his perfect figure as he walks away. Shit, don't stare!

Carly's jaw drops. "Oh my god..." She looks at Andrew, then back at me, then back at him again. "I see what's going on here!"

I start to panic. "Wait no baby I swear tha--" She puts a finger to my mouth, suddenly getting creepily calm.

"Don't ever call me 'baby' again. You broke my heart, Noah. You broke my fucking heart!" She's nearly incoherent, grabbing a diet Dr. Pepper from the hands of some girl at the table and throwing it in my face with a flustered thrust.

I'm so shocked I don't even fully realize what happened until I feel the thick syrupy liquid weighing on my eyelids and dripping from my chin. When I can see clearly again, Carly is already storming out of the lunch room.

"Shit. What happened to you?" Andrew asks, walking back with a bag of barbecue chips.

I dry my face, dazed. "I'm not really sure. I think Carly just decided to douse me in this chick's soda." I motion towards the angry girl across from me.

"What did you tell her..." He says quietly.

"Nothing! She just sort of...realized." I get quieter.

Everyone looks really confused. "Realized what, Noah?" A girl named Faith asks.

"N-nothing." I stutter out. "She's just...crazy. But I guess we're over."

The girl smiles. "So you're on the market?"

"No!" Andrew snaps. He looks around at the shocked faces and chuckles awkwardly. "Umm, I mean, you really liked her. Just give her a chance to cool off and maybe you can get back together. Or something. Or maybe not. Maybe she can just be fuckin' crazy for her whole life and we can all just move on and never talk about that nasty hoe ever again. But that doesn't mean you can date him. You're just some popular girl who likes Noah for his fantastic body. And I don't mean that in a gay way. 'Cause Noah and I are totally just friends."

"Good save, Andy." I mumble so only he can hear me.

"Yes, I'm just naturally charismatic like that." He says sarcastically, rolling his eyes.

Faith is sighing. "Yeah whatever." She says, getting back to her lunch and wrinkling her nose.

I get up abruptly and take in a deep breath. "So I'm just gonna go clean this off."

Andrew pops up next to me. "I'll help you!" They eye him again, suspiciously. "In a totally straight way. God, stop staring at me people!"

I grab his wrist and drag him out of there. "That was real smooth."

"Your popular friends make me nervous! It's not my fault!" We reach the bathroom door and hurry in.

He keeps saying that word. Popular. I guess I say it too, but what does that mean, anyway? Who decides what is good enough to be deemed popular and what is not? Why is it that it even matters so much to us? I mean, it seems like the only important thing in a 20th-century high school, but of all people, you'd think Andy would be the least concerned. He's so... out there. Besides, if those are "popular people," I don't want to identify as their friends. I mean a girl just threw soda in my face, and nobody batted an eye. You'd think they'd care a little, and not just ask if I'm single.

"They aren't really my friends. More like, lunch table acquaintances." I huff.

Andrew grabs a wad of paper towels and runs them under the water, then starts wiping the soda up off my face. "Well, at least the Carly thing is out of the way."

"Somehow I feel like that's definitely not the end of that." I sniff, going along with the subject change.

"Why not? Because she's crazy?" He smirks.

I nod. "Exactly."

He shakes his head. "She'll get over it. It's not like she ever really listened to you, anyway."

"Yeah, she was a pretty horrible girlfriend. You know she told me once she wanted to make 'chocolate babies'?"

Andy throws back his head and laughs. "Neither of you are black! And that's a little racist."

"That's what I said!" I laugh back.

He finishes wiping. "There. That's as clean as you're gonna get." He tosses the paper towels into the trash can. "But feel free to take off those sticky clothes. If you'd be more comfortable."

I shove him playfully. "Nice try."

He smiles coyly and rests his hands on my waist. "Plllleasseee."

"You're so cute." I kiss him quickly, then pull away as somebody walks out of a stall.

Andrew looks down and shuffles his feet until the guy leaves. When we're alone again, he gives me a fierce kiss before starting to trot out of the bathroom.

God, that boy. He's so strange. I love it.

"Boyfriend," I say to myself. "That's what you call it."