Phan Oneshots

The Kids Aren't Alright

The red light over the door lit up, signaling the two boys were on air.

"Hello everyone! I'm Dan, and this is Phil, and your watching The Internet Takeover on BBC Radio One!" Dan started, grinning as he added in a cheesy but dramatic sound effect.

"We're going to start off this show with The Seven Second Challenge! If you don't know what it is, it's a game where basically you give the other person a challenge and they have seven seconds to complete it. You then judge whether they passed or failed, and the winner gets to choose the next song. Ready, Dan?" Phil said, glancing over at him. Dan just looked to the camera, slightly worried.

"As ready as I'll ever be." Phil laughed, his tongue poking out slightly.

"Then let's go!"

"Say something really upsetting while doing jazz hands!" Phil said, reading off a note card that was a violent shade of purple.

"Oh... shh- okay um... my dog choked on its food and died yesterday." He said while shaking his hands about. Phil laughed, then went on to say he passed.  Dan picked up his cards, which were, of course grey, and read off his challenge.

"Act out your signature football celebration!" Dan laughed, neither of them watched football.

"I don't watch football, Dan!" he exclaimed. "Um... woohoo? I guess..." Phil did a little hop and smiled.

Dan laughed at his friend. "Phil, you totally failed that, and you know it."

"Whenever people kicked the ball at me I always got hit, I don't even know how football works." He shrugged.

They continued on with the game, and even though he was off to a rough start, Phil ended up winning. As Dan played their generic celebratory music, Phil chose what song he wanted.

"Okay, Phil, what song is it this time? And if you say The Circle Of Life again I might have to leave. I love the Lion King, but not that much." He grinned.

"Okay, well first of all, I have to say something," Phil said. "I dedicate this song to someone important in my life who I couldn't live without. They've been by my side for six years now, since last week marked the date."

Dan looked over at Phil, searching his face for a clue about what was happening. Phil just continued to talk, his mouth forming a small half-smile.

"Without them, I've no clue where or who I would be, and they've changed me for the better. They mean so much to me and I couldn't ask for a better best friend, because... well, there isn't one." Phil said, looking to Dan quickly.

"So, I dedicate The Kids Aren't All Right by Fall Out Boy to Dan Howell. Bye guys, and we'll see you next time!"

As the song started to play, Dan and Phil places their headsets on the table in front of them, waving to the cameras one last time before they went off air. The lyrics began, and the taller man took the others hand in his, smiling as his raven-haired friend put his head against his shoulder.

Stuck in the jet wash.
Bad trip I couldn't get off.
And maybe I bit off more than I could chew
And overhead of the aqua blue.

Fall to your knees, bring on the rapture.
Blessed be the boys time can't capture
On film or between the sheets.
I always fall from your window to the pitch-black streets.

And with the black banners raised
As the crooked smiles fade.
Former heroes who quit too late.
Who just wanna fill up the trophy case again.

And in the end
I'd do it all again.
I think you're my best friend.
Don't you know that the kids aren't al-, kids aren't alright?
I'm yours.
When it rains it pours.
Stay thirsty like before.
Don't you know that the kids aren't al-, kids aren't alright?

I'm not passive but aggressive.
Take note it's not impressive.
Empty your sadness like you're dumping your purse on my bedroom floor
We put your curse in reverse.

And it's our time now if you want it to be.
Maul the world like a carnival bear set free.
And your love is anemic.
And I can't believe that you couldn't see it coming for me.

And I still feel that rush in my veins.
It twists my head just a bit to think.
All those people in those old photographs I've seen are dead.

And in the end
I'd do it all again.
I think you're my best friend.
Don't you know that the kids aren't al-, kids aren't alright?
I'm yours.
When it rains it pours.
Stay thirsty like before.
Don't you know that the kids aren't al-, kids aren't alright?

And sometimes I just wanna sit around and gaze at my shoes, yeah.
And let your dirty sadness fill me up just like a balloon.

And in the end
I'd do it all again.
I think you're my best friend.
Don't you know that the kids aren't al-, kids aren't alright?
I'm yours.
When it rains it pours.
Stay thirsty like before.
Don't you know that the kids aren't al-, kids aren't alright?

________________________
First off, I have to say I don't own The Kids Aren't Alright, sadly. (But I wish I did.) Second, I want to announce.... PINOF 7 HAPPENED. And we all know what that means... *raises eyebrows and giggles* Wait... I don't giggle. I am fire...I am death!! Yeah, that's better.

And last but never least, thanks to all of you guys who read this!! You make my day and I love all of you. If you have any ideas or requests, just leave a comment or message me!