Carl Grimes Imagines

Sometimes I wonder

Sometimes, I wonder if we have anything to live for anymore. If there is anything worth living for. My mom is dead. My dad is... gone. Everyone is broken. Here at the prison, everyone is busy doing their own stuff, busy with their own shit, that they forget about me. They talk about the Governor and Woodbury, and if it's so bad, why would the only good thing in my life come from it?

Sometimes, I wonder if we have anything to live for anymore. But then I look right next to me, to the girl sleeping on my shoulder, and I think, yeah I do. Her brown hair is all ruffly and messed and I wouldn't have it any other way. She is lightly snoring and I find it really cute. Actually, I find everything about her cute. She is my happiness. Her name is Dallas.

Dallas is only new here, and at first I thought she was kinda shady, but I grew close to her and we became friends, best friends. We can say anything and everything to each other and she's the only person that could make me truly laugh since mom. No, since everything. The whole thing.

It's past midnight I guess, looking at the twinkling bright stars, which are light years away, yet I feel so close to them. The beautiful sparkle that ignites just a little bit of hope in my heart that the world isn't completely over. The shining light it gives off, even in the darkest of times, and will continue to do so. I have no clue what is going to happen next, I could be dead next week, or next month, or tomorrow, but all that really matters is this moment, me, and her.

Sometimes, I wonder if wishes really do come true. I know it sounds silly, but it gives me a relief to wish upon a shooting star. Scientifically, the star was hundreds of years ago and it's just reaching Earth now and scientifically, your wish is too late. But in my heart I actually believe that stars are magical, that stars are infinite, never too late. So as I see a shooting star glance through the sky, I close my eyes tightly and I make a wish.

As I make the wish, my eyes get heavy and at that exact moment, I fall asleep. The last thought in my head was my wish, replaying over and over again.

The sunlight hit directly into my eyes, waking me up, but still groggy. I am laying on the soft grass, by myself. Getting up, I brush off the dirt and I look for Dallas, who is nowhere to be seen.

The walkers have been piling up on our fence and I don't know how much it can take. Taking a step closer to the walkers, they growl and reach for my flesh, and sometimes I wonder if walkers can feel. Or love. Or cry. But then I shake the stupid idea off, I'm just sleepy.

I walk into the gates of the prison and instantly the smell of bread, cheese and bacon filled up my senses, after seeing Carol, Dallas, and Beth making them. Dallas walks over and hands me a plate. I get a whiff and I remember how good of a cook Dallas was.

"Hey, sorry I left... I couldn't carry you, and I wanted to help make breakfast." She said apologetically.
"It's fine,thanks for the breakfast." I laugh and she smiles gently back at me.

We sit together and she gives me a piece of bacon, as I give her a slice of bread and cheese. We do this all the time because we both know what the other person's favourite food is, what they don't like, etc. Things like this come naturally to us now, we literally work and think and live like one person.

Sometimes I wonder, what if Dallas never left Woodbury and I never met her... My life would be so different. I would be depressed, sick, and maybe even dead. She's been such a huge impact, she's changed my whole life.

We eat in silence, but I could tell Beth was making faces. She always teases us about being a couple... but we're just... we're just friends.

After breakfast, my dad told me to go read a few books, but I can't. Dallas and I share a cell together, but right now, she is off helping take care of Judith. I am bored to death and I decide to read my comics.

Sometimes I wonder if comics make you smarter, or what? What is the use? Everything has a purpose, right? So what is a comics? Or, what is mine?

6 pages in, I hear a swift click clack of combat boots running to my door. Turning around I see my dad, covered in blood, with a couple tears in his eyes, and a fear and a dread in his voice when he said

"Coral, come quick-- now, she's-- she's bit."

My heart leaped out of my chest and before I knew it, I was running, running away from reality. This isn't real. This is probably a dream. She's not bit.

Finally, I see her. I see her beautiful, tragic, smile. Her neck is covered in blood and as I take a closer look, I find a nasty, bloody, bite, on her shoulder. I shake my head. Wake up, Carl. Wake the hell up.

Her shirt is stained with blood and her eyes are getting misty. A single, crystal, teardrop falls onto her cheek which I wipe away.

"Shh. Don't cry, please."
I said, my voice trying hard not to break.

"Carl... I-- I love you so much.I'm sorry I never got to tell you because I never built up the courage... Now that I'm about to die, I just wanted you to know."

"Shut up... You're not going to die. Please, don't."

She doesn't reply, but grabs my shirt and starts sobbing into it. I am numb, lifeless, I will not lose her.

I remember the wish I made yesterday. Yesterday feels like such a long time, but the wish I made was and will always be what I want in life. My wish was for us to grow old together, spend our lives in each other's love, and be together till the very end. My wish.

I remember those walkers I was staring at, this morning. I said that they can't feel anything, how they're dead. But I know, I'm certain, that if I let her die by herself, I cannot and will not feel. I will not love anything ever again. I will be as dead as those walkers outside the fences.

I remember me, not a few moments ago, questioning what my purpose in life was. What destiny had in plan for me. What destiny had in plan for us. For everything.

Then it all became clear.

I want-- no I need, my wish to come true. Maybe stars don't help at all, maybe it's your choice whether your wish comes true. My choice.

I need to be with her till our last waking moment. I am dead without her, just another walker. It's my purpose in life. She's my destiny.

I replay these thoughts in my head as I grab my gun from my holster.

"I love you, Dallas." I whisper, before kissing her forehead. She closes her eyes and I can tell she is gone.

I bring my gun to my forehead.

Wishes do come true.
She's my destiny.

I pull the trigger.

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