Our Little Cliche (ereri/riren.)✔️

What

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My pencil dragged over the canvas as I held it with careful anticipation as I drew the circle. Then the jaw line that connected off the circle. I worked with precision; I think I knew this because my eraser was already half gone and shaved away. I chewed on my bottom lip as I took a step back, looking at everyone else's work. Some were much better than my own while others didn't even try and looked like a mess that was smeared and their erasers untouched. With slight more confidence, I continued on with my drawing, focusing on only that and throwing away all the other problems I have had. Like Jean for example. Over these two weeks of school all he has done is pestered me over anything I messed up on. Like if I got a slightly lower grade on homework than him, he would brag about how smart he was until Mikasa walked up and showed him her perfect score that was over 10 extra points over than his score. Jean would just end up getting flustered then proceed to tease me about how I was dumber than my sister, but I just ignored him and pretended he wasn't there. And now in this art studio that seemed like my only escape left in this town I only had, and when the Art Studio was closed I would venture off into the woods and sit near the cliff that looked out into the river and beyond everything that place held. Sometimes when I was unable to sleep and my mind would keep me awake I would walk over there and look at the stars. Wherever I went, my sketchbook and pencils always tagged along, almost craving to draw anything I could find. I would draw the fallen leaves or the cliff view; which was always different each day. Or on rare occasions I would draw the stars, and the galaxy beyond that. I would just plug my headphones in and blast the volume to the loudest I could get. It helped keep my calm look over the treacherous 2 weeks that have slowly ticked on. Soon my timer would be going off, maybe or maybe not. But one day it would and I would be gone, and I won't be one to say no one would miss me because I am selfish enough to say someone would. Someone would miss me when my timer ticks to the final second. Armin, Mikasa, my mom, and my dad would all miss me. They care about me enough to miss me.

But I didn't think about any of that as I finished the last eye on the face. Looking back up at the model who sat in a wooden chair, a flat face on her features and long blonde hair. I knew her, it was Historia and she was dating her over protective girlfriend named Ymir. They have been together for about a year and not once have I ever seen them fight. It was a blissful relationship the two had and it made me happy to see such a perfect couple find each other so easily. I have always wanted something so nice like that. Something that would make my heart skip 10 beats by just being in their close presence. As long as I could make that person, whoever they may be, smile just once or twice then I would feel complete. But I have not felt that joy or that heart jumping feeling of that look, that glance or that peek of their smile. We are all made of love, it is just that some people have yet to find it in themselves to show it or even express it with a smile, a laugh, a hug, or anything. I started to work on the hair, making it flow as if she was standing in the wind, the breeze making her blonde hair fly behind her like a cape showing strength. And instead of a dull flat mouth, I have Historia a wide smile and made her arms up like a bird's wings as I drew her standing near that same cliff that dropped down to the river. I was actually happy for once with such a major drawing that I smiled myself once I took another step back, feeling more and more confidence build up inside me. I was proud and that was enough to make me pack up my pencils and pens along with everyone else. I walked out of the shop, feeling the air start to be colder than usual. It was going to be winter soon and I was so happy that it was soon to come. I thought of all the times my mom and I made hot chocolate for our neighbors, and they would bring us cookies or some other tasty treat.

I remember when I was kid, and my mother and I would take a walk to the park in the midst of winter at night, and look at the lights the park staff always put up in the trees. That when I was walking past that same park now, I peeked and imagined the same lights dangling from branch to branch on the trees, all connecting them together and making them look dazzling. My eyes caught that same ravenette guy from a couple weeks ago. He was the new kid in our school; and although I knew almost nothing about him, it still sparked my curiosity on why I haven't seen him in class. Maybe it was the fact we simply don't have any classes together. The raven was sitting on the wooden bench my mother and I always sat on when we looked at the beautiful christmas lights and starry night that sparkled above our head. Something changed in her as we grew up and adopted Mikasa into our family. It was like she didn't care about the little things but instead cared about us being successful in our family or else if we weren't then what kind of family were we to her? None at all? I found myself sitting next to him on the bench, making him snap his head to me and frown, almost like a bit of disappointment.

"Hello," I waved, smiling before turning my head to the sunset instead of trying to make eye contact with him. The wind whipped harshly against the grain of the wood, making it creak and groan like always. There was silence and peeked over to the man and he was still looking at me like I was some stupid twat. "What do you want?" He asked, now looking away and not making eye contact with me. I shrugged and looked at the big oak tree in the middle of the park that all the lights would've connected to. I would stand underneath it and look up, seeing the sparkling lights over me and all leading to the tree. It was one of the many things that made me smile. This moment right now on this bench was another thing that made me want to smile warmly and bring back all the happy memories. "Nothing," I said softly, smiling and shutting my eyes, trying to imagine the park once again was the snow covered grass and the big green trees that were frosted over with crystals and snowflakes. I always used to try and catch them on my jacket sleeve and just to get a peek of the pretty little design of what they looked like. Some where so unique and so delicate that even if you breathed on them they would melt away into your tongue or your sleeve.

"When I was a kid," I sat up, opening my eyes and opening my palms, and looking at the man who seemed very disinterested in my words but I still spoke on, "My mother and I used to come here during winter and all the pretty lights would be up and the snow would be layered over the green grass and the leaves would be frosted over with snow flakes." I described like I did in my head, smiling at my own words as I raised from my seat, outstretching my arms. "It was times like those I felt like I could fly." I whispered and let my arms become numb and fall back to my side meaninglessly. "I know I am on a timer, but for now I want to enjoy it while I have the chance, don't you?" I turned my head to see an empty spot in the bench. He had left. I shrugged, feeling fine as I came off a little weird as I picked up my bag and walked off, back to the cliff I go. The trail was long, at least a good 10 to 15 minute walk through the old trees that swayed when it was windy. The bird chirped from about and the crickets did too from below. The sound of this made my music in my phone seem meaningless and dull.

I walked on, my hands in my pockets and my head turned up to the clouds, tree tops and the sky. It was all fading from existence slowly right before my very eyes.

As I turned the corner I saw the man sitting on the edge of the cliff, but he didn't look like he was going to jump or anything, but just sitting there like I used to and staring off at the river and the trees below. I smiled, 'maybe him and I were going to get along after all.'

Maybe, Indeed.

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Sorry for spelling errors :3