So my mom is a total fucker. I'm 16, and she's just now deciding to get me a phone.
But not just any phone, an iPhone 6 shipped straight from China! It came to us in a plastic bag with a picture of the real deal and then some watch batteries flying out of water. Mom cut it open, and found a pretty convincing looking 'iPhone 6'.
She gave me a stupid smile plastered across that stupid face, with her stupid hand pushing her stupid hair behind her stupid ear.
"Enjoy honey bun." She said in her stupid voice. Ugh, just stupid.
I mumbled a 'thanks' and headed to my room. Post bag opening, I turnt it on and it did a stupid T-Mobile knock off jingle. I was welcomed to a panda looking shit keyboard that looked kinda fuzzy. The thing wanted me to type on my name. So I did.
"Wheel-come On-dree-uh."
Said a Siri sounding voice on FULL volume.
"AW FUCK! THAT'S LOUD SHIT! " I yelled to myself.
I ran my fingers through my hair and added a emoji behind my name.
"What do I do now?" I asked myself.
I remembered watching all those funny omegle chat vids on YouTube with my cousin Cody.
( I'm totally forced to hang with him , and pretend I like it ).
I searched for quite a while searching for the real omegle, and not any apps trying to be like it.
I'd say a solid 30 minutes went by before I downloaded the legit omegle. So I thought. I opened it up.
"Huh, looks legit" I said.
Little did I know, they spelled omegle, Omeggle, and it was a fake...
STEP 2 DAY 1 : Download Omeggle
*****
I was on Omeggle, and I pressed spy. I typed in the question,
' What do you like in a woman? '
Just, uh, wondering. Not that I HATE my body or anything. Just trust me, I'm giving you the advice here, don't question me!
On Omeggle:
What do u like in a woman?????
Searching for connections...
Connections found
Crazy_ass : tits and ass
Horny_BOB: Blowjob lips, fat ass, big boobs, sexy curves, light skin, curly hair, tight pussy, the usual
Crazy_ass disconnected
Both players disconnected...
******
"Well I feel great." I sighed.
On Omeggle:
Do looks matter?????
Searching for connections...
Connections found
Rainbow_pride: I'm gay... In a man , no, it's all about heart. I don't give a fuck about girls. Walk around looken like Chewbacca IDC!
Hella_hoes: hell yeah! I ain't fucken wit no hoe! She better got a body!!!
Rainbow_pride: ur sick ya know that Bastard?!? I don't care how women look cuz I'm gay, but being straight you need some respect for women if you ever wanna good relationship.
Hella_hoes: read my name bro. I know what I'm doing. Say they're pretty, get in their pants, and get the fuck out.
Rainbow_pride disconnected
Both players disconnected...
******
