Fighting Your Demons - H2OVanoss

Page 20

Delirious's P.O.V

" Thank you" my voice was soft and Lui looked over at me with a smile " For what" he asked I sighed " Making me face them" I said in a whisper he gave my shoulder a pat " Your welcome I'm just glad you didn't try to kill me" he said as I gave him a gentle smile and we shared a laugh, we pulled into the carnival and my heart started to pound I haven't really been in public unless I wanted to kill and with so many people around I didn't know if I could hold back, Lui grabbed my hand giving it a squeeze " You can do it I'll be here if you need me" he let go and got out of the car I don't know why the little guy was so nice but I didn't mind it much.

I got out and saw Evan slicking his hair up until I looked over seeing Luke ran up to me engulfing me in a hug " Just like old times" he whispered into my chest " Let's go mother truckers" Lui said as him and David walked over to me, Tyler and Craig walked off after what happened earlier I'm guessing they want to be alone but when they heard the cars start they made us wait because they wanted to come, we walked through the crowds of people I could feel my nerves growing I grabbed Lui and pulled him aside " Your ok just stick by me I'm sure Luke won't mind" he said giving me a caring look, I nodded and walked next to Lui while David was giving us weird looks almost like Evan was and Luke was to busy talking to some chick they always flocked to him, we stopped in front of a game and Lui won a monkey stuffed animal he squeaked and held it tightly I laughed a little because I don't know why but this guy is one of a kind he came back over to me " Look it's me" he said in his squeaker voice making me laugh, he turned around and tugged my arm we continued to walk until we got to the edge of it and I sat down to smoke Evan joined me " Ye still look better" David said as Lui was playing with his monkey like a kid would " But your adorable" Lui said and David's face grew red but I was the only one who noticed.

Some guys across from us were staring me down but I shock it off because I didn't need to get stressed Lui was right if I want freedom I need to watch myself, when we were done the guys stood up and started to walk I got up last going to follow until I heard one of the guys say " Freak" I stopped and went to turn around " Oh look the freak stopped" I grew pissed off at those words and I started to walk towards the guy saying that shit to me as he walked up to me as well " What are you going to do about it... fre" I punched him in the face cutting him off before he could finish that sentence, he swung back and I kicked his knee making him fall backwards then I punched him in the stomach once he was curled down I brought my knee to his face and pushed him backwards, I was about to swing again when I felt someone grab my hand and spin me around " Don't" Lui said softly as I saw the other guys looking at me, Lui touched my lip which made me jump a little " Stop I'm wiping the blood off" he said making me stop.

" Oh look the freak needs friends" the guy chuckled and I was about to go at him again but before I could blink Evan had him pinned to the wall by his throat " Call him a freak one more time and you will deal with me" the guy spit in Evans face whispering freak then Evan snapped he ripped the guy off the wall and punched him repeatedly in the face until the man fell to the ground, Evan slowly bent down grabbing his shirt pulling him close to his face " He's not a freak" Evan said before he dropped the guy and got back up, he walked over to me pulling me into a hug " Don't ever let anyone get to you, your no freak" he whispered in my ear and Lui must have saw me tense up " Evan let's just go and forget about this" he said pulling Evan off me, we started to walk again but Evan was now behind us and he wasn't letting me out of his sight " Lui I need to get away" I whispered I didn't think he heard me but he grabbed my sleeve pulling me into the crowd when David and Evan weren't looking, he ran till we got far enough away then we slowed to walk and he let go of my arm, I let out a sigh when we were out of the crowd and was now walking down the street, we stayed silent as we sat down on a bench " Are you ok now" he asked and I nodded my head, he leaned back and relaxed so I joined him.

*Time skip*

I felt tapping on my arm and Lui was standing in front of me I groaned out then rubbed my face " Well good morning we gotta head back it's late" he laughed and I pulled out my phone looking at the time it was 3 in the morning I must have fallen asleep, I got to my feet and we walked back to where my car was parked, I saw a tear in Lui's eye I didn't know what was wrong so I just grabbed his hand and I saw him jump a little looking at me, I gave him a soft smile and he wrapped his arms around me I normally would rather be dead then do this but the guy has this vibe about him that you just can't help, I held his head and rubbed his back until the soft cries stopped and he stepped back " Thank you" he said as he wiped the tears from his face.

We finally reached my car it was the only one in the parking lot I unlocked my doors and got inside " I think David likes you" I said and I saw his eyes start to water up again " I know" he said it sounded like he was trying not to cry again I placed a hand on his arm " Then why are you crying" I asked, he put his head on the window and sighed " I don't know if I can be with him" he said sounding broken I squeezed his arm again " I didn't have a good past... well you remind me a lot of myself and I'm sure you know how hard it is to... get close to someone let alone catch feelings for them" I said thinking about Evan and the way I started to get close to him but yet every time I did my demons wouldn't let me so I pushed myself away.

I stopped the car and made Lui look me in the eyes " If he really likes you then let him help you" I said he then reached over and hugged me " But I'm scared" he whispered I ran my fingers through his hair " It's ok to be scared sometimes" I whispered back I could feel my eyes getting watery because I could never let myself be with someone and now I'm telling Lui that you can be, I hugged him tighter and we sat there until a car passed us I let go and he sat back in his seat for the rest of the drive home it was quite I could tell he was deep in thought about it and I just needed to be alone this much contact isn't good for me.

We pulled into the garage and I saw the truck the other guys took parked they must have come home and waited for us, when we got out of the car I locked it up opening the door slowly looking inside to see the lights turned out " They are probably asleep" Lui said as he turned the lights on so we could see, we sat on the couch watching random movies halfway through the first one I saw Lui curled up to his stuffed monkey asleep I chuckled to myself standing up I picked him up holding him in my arms as I made my way to the bedrooms till I found his, I placed him on the bed and covered him up " You should listen to your own advice" I heard him speak quietly as he got more comfortable " Good night" is all I said before I shut the door I only said those things because he is more normal then I am, I went downstairs and sat on the couch I didn't want to sleep not after everything that happened, I sat there pondering all the events could I be normal at some point, what does it feel like to be normal I thought to myself as more questions came into my head until they stopped when I heard those words in the back of my mind " Freak" ... " I don't want you here" ... " He's a killer" ... " I made you and I know how to break you" I clenched my fists I remembering everything all the bad how I liked to kill and I never loved anyone after my parents died then the coldness feel over me I was alone and that's how I will always be, I didn't get feelings when I was Delirious he kept me from feeling anything that could make me weak.

Turning the T.V off I went to my room to ponder everything, laying in my bed I turned some music on I tried to block out the voices in my head but they only got louder " let them help you" ... " Take your own advice"... " Stay please"... " RUN"... " Why do you kill"... they wouldn't stop and I couldn't stop them it was all my fault this is happening this is why I don't get close to people let alone try and be normal... I will never be normal, I grabbed my hockey mask from my desk grabbed my white tank top throwing my blue jacket over then putting on some slightly tight cargo pants I walked out of my room and into the armory I remember the code from watching Lui put it in, unlocking the door I stepped in and grabbed my knife when I finally found it.

I laced up my boats and got my car keys I started my car up and left the house taking one look back, I floored the gas I took turn after turn until I heard two cop cars behind me I stopped and stepped out of my car the police were standing by their doors before they could react I pulled my gun out and shot them each, luckily they didn't have good aim I jumped back into my car and took off, I found myself at my one favorite spot I stepped out of my car and smoked a cigarette relaxing a bit before I got back in, I took off again I would be found to easily if I stayed here and after what I just did I don't plan on being caught any time soon I won't go back to them I can't go back, I start to drive faster remembering the rush I get when seeing blood and tonight I was going to get my feel of it why you may ask me, why do this when it looked like I could have been saved, I screamed at the top of my lungs with my psychotic voice " IM DELIRIOUS OUTTA MY MIND".