Paisley's Faith

Chapter 33

I sit in the waiting room as I hold myself in fear. I wait for the news of Jason in the girl impatiently and nearly jump in surprise when my family comes bursting through the door. Even my aunt is there and all of their eyes immediately latch onto me.

They all quickly run over to me and tackle me into a hug, nearly squeezing the life out of me in the process. "You had us scared to death!" My mom shouts at me and I let out a shuddering breath into her shoulder as I attempt to explain the situation to her but she quickly silences me.

"Yes, they already told me. It's going to be okay." She murmurs as she holds my against her and rocks back in forth as she attempts to comfort me. Tears fall from my eyes as I worry about Jason's state. Is this how everyone felt the times I was in the hospital? No, it can't be. Jason's pain was caused by unselfish reasons, mine were caused by my own personal gain.

"D-do you think he'll be okay, M-mama?" Jeremiah stutters as he looks up at our mom with big, round eyes. Tears start to streak down his cheeks and I reach out to pull him into my lap. I rest my chin on his head as he cries into my shirt. 

I quickly wipe away my tears and hold him as I attempt to comfort him while my mom comforts me. I watch as my dad paces in front of us worriedly before walking over to where the reception desk sits. He says some things to her and I notice his face visibly fall. 

He walks back to us and attempts to give us a cheerful smile, but I see right through it. "What's wrong?" I ask softly and he shoots a quick glance at Jeremiah. Mom sees this as well and says, "Why don't we go get something to eat? Come on Jeremiah, you can help me." Jeremiah nods blankly before following her down the hall and towards the hospital cafeteria.

As soon as they disappear around the corner my dad sinks into the chair beside me before taking my hand in his. I squeeze his hand reassuringly but he simply lets out a shuddering sigh in return. We both sit in silent for a few minutes before he says, "He lost a lot of blood, he fell unconscious shortly after they got him here."

I feel myself tense at this news. This shouldn't have happened. Not to Jason. I stare at my dad, waiting for more but it takes him a moment to collect himself again before he says, "They say that he'll be alright but," He pauses for a moment to take in a shuddering breath before continuing, "infection had already spread to his leg. They had to cut it off." He finishes softly and I let all of this sink in.

I fall back against the chair I'm sitting in and stare at the hospital waiting room blankly. Why him Lord? Why Jason? What has he done so wrong that he would have his leg taken? He was just trying to help that girl! 

I notice my dad staring at me and I reach up to touch my face, only to feel the wetness from my tears. I wrap my arms around myself and cry. My dad attempts to comfort me, but I barely notice him as my anger at God boils inside of me.

Why does bad things happen to good people?! Jason doesn't deserve to be treated like this! He's lost his family and now his leg! I hold my head as these thoughts pound inside before looking around, looking for an escape from this small waiting room.

That's when a nurse walks up and gives me a sympathetic smile. "Jason has woken up, would you like to see him?" She asks us softly and I quickly stand, nodding as I do while I wipe my tears. My dad says for me to gone on ahead while he waits for my mom and Jeremiah. 

I follow the nurse through a string of hallways until we come to a door with a small window showing Jason looking small and frail in a hospital gown. He looks up as we walk in and offers a small smile. I try my best to smile back but fail miserably as I pull up a small chair to sit beside his bed. 

The nurse leaves us and I attempt to ignore the absence of the place his right leg should be under the covers. "H-how are you?" I stutter as I take his hand in mine. He smiles before replying, "I've felt better, but I'll be alright." He runs a hand through his hair before adding, "I guess we should thank the Lord I'm still alive." 

Of course you would still be this strong in your faith. I think as I frown at his comment. "Should we also thank him for taking your leg?" I ask bitterly and he looks at me in surprise. I refuse to meet his gaze as I stare down at our hands before slowly letting my eyes trail to where his leg used to be.

"God doesn't promise us an easy life, He just promises us that he'll be there for us through it all. That is, if we let Him." I look up at him with my eyes full of tears as he says this before shaking my head. "I just don't understand why everything bad seems to happen to you when you're just trying to help!"

He reaches up and wipes a few of my tears before shaking his head. "Jesus went through much worse and he never did anything wrong. He died for our sins, not his, ours. He was crucified on that day and then came back three days later for us." He reaches up and gently lifts my head to look at him before saying, "If the worst thing that ever happens to me is losing my leg and being a foster kid, I think I'll be okay." 

I feel my tears roll down my cheeks as I stare at him sadly. "I don't like seeing people I care about in pain." I tell him softly and reaches out before pulling me into a hug. "I know, but it's a part of life that sometimes, you just can't control. But one day, there will be no more pain."