The Makeover

When does it get any better

Kian held tightly onto me, as hard as I tried to fight his grip. The cameras flashing only made it worse. I felt like an idiot. An ugly, idiot. He sat me down in his car. Buckling me in as I still kicked and screamed.

"I know baby, it's okay, calm down." He told me. I shut up, and cried silently into my hands. I was heartbroken. I hate myself. I hate myself. You idiot. You FUCKING idiot!

......................................................................................................................

We laid on Kian's chest, cying loud and hard as he stroked my hair. "my fucking boyfriend! Ugh I hate him, how could I have not seen it! 365 damn days! Then THEM. Damn You NASH FUCKING GRIER! I was his sister! And SHAWN! MENDES BETTER FUCKING PRAY I DON'T RIP OFF HIS FUCKING BALLS!! UGH!"

"Whoa, whoa there, as a person with a nice set of balls, I would appreciate if you didn't talk about ripping them off. Thank you, it's appreciated"

I giggled at the comment, "I'm sorry, it's just too much as been going on. Could you got to the store and get me a shit ton of ice cream? Please?"

"Anything for you darling." He kissed my forehead as he sat up and slid his shoes on. As soon as he walked out of the front door, I ran to the bathroom, in search of a razor. I locked the door as soon as I found one. Crouching on the otherside of the bathrom I said,

"Your an idiot." I said and cut my wrist. "Moron. Ugly, slut. Weirdo. No one will ever love you. Your hated. Why are you still here?" Each word had earned a cut. I looked at my arm fianlly noticiing I had 7 cuts on my arm blood dripping from each one. Soon I heard a knock on the door. "Mace?" 

I stayed silent, "Macy?" He repeated sounding more urgent. "Macy Grier do not make me burst down this door cause I will." Macey Fucking Grier!" He voice sounding more urgent. All I could do was stay silent, staring at my arm, afraid that if I spoke I'd break down. "MACY! MACY! MACY! MACY! OPEN THE DAMN DOOR! What the fuck! MACY! MACY! PLEASE!"I was crying sliently. Until I heard the door burst open. My wrist immedetly flew behind me. 
      "What the fuck was that Mace? Why didn't you -" He stopped looking at my arm. "What's behind your back? Macy?" He grabbed my wrist making me wince in pain. He looked down, his hand covered in my blood. "Oh my god! Macy! Jesus! No, no, no! Why?" He had tears in his eyes. "Im not leaving you like this." He held onto my wrist slowly, and carefully bringing it to the sink and rinsing it off. He bandaged it up and looked into my eyes, "Why Macy? I know your sad but it gets better you know." 

      "They keep saying it gets better, but when? It's not changing anything for me. I'm worthless, I am."

     "Macy, no, no, your not worthless, I don't know what I would do if you were gone. I'd never be able to open my heart. You can't leave me. I don't want you to leave, ever. I - I -I love you. I wouldn't trade you for the world. You are my everything. I never want to see that again. Ever. And if you ever run into any problem, even the smallest thing, they better not lay a finger on you, I want you to tell me, I'll beat the shit out of THEM. Okay? I never want to come home to this," I nodded, "You Promise?"

 "I promise." I said meekly, He embraced me in the biggest and best hug ever. Picking me up bridal and laying me down on his bed, where I soon fell asleep in his arms.