Dear Sam,
It's 3 am. You can't stop crying and your eyes are very swollen. To be honest you don't remember the last time you cried this hard and don't really want to remember. Today has just kinda sucked. You woke up to an energetic family putting up Christmas decorations but all you could think about was how bad you looked and how much you hated the things on your chest. After a long few hours of trying to participate you went to your room and finally lost it. Not being able to move or talk for about thirty minutes.
Your friend called you and told you that she had locked her keys out of her car. You did what any good friend would do and got her and took her where she need to go to get the spare keys. After you went back to her house and you guys played cards. You told her the problems you had been having with your girlfriend.
Yep I said girlfriend. Has been for about 3 weeks now. But you were upset because every time you talk anything about being Trans or anything she shuts down. This only makes your problems worse and it hurts more knowing how the person you love so much feel about the issue that is so important to you and your life.
You also have a new little brother named Oliver. He's about 15 but you guys are just about twins. You like all the same things and also can just relate to each other about certain issues.
I think you need to just take a deep breath and calm down. Tomorrow is a new day and when the sun comes up everything will be different. If I could hug and tell you it was going to be okay I would but it's a bit hard to hug yourself. Hang in there kid.
- a letter to me
