The Slightest Glance

Just a few tears

   I walk in the doors at school feeling tired as I barely got any sleep. I thought to myself,"Why, why do I even care anymore, why do I get up get dressed, just to be tortured even more?". I went to my locker to get the day started. I look at my locker," this can't be my locker". It had pictures of people off security cameras taped on it! I check the number. "745, yup this is mine". I look around, no one is looking at me so I just open my locker, put my stuff inside but bring out my exacto-knife from art class to get the pictures off, along with my history and reading books because they were my next classes. I close my locker and put my books on the floor.
   I sigh then take out my knife to try to get the tape up off my locker. "damn tape! Why do you have to be here right now!" I thought to myself. As I'm getting off my locker I feel someone looking at me. So I turn around and jump a little because right there 6" away is Sean. AKA my bully, he for some reason doesn't like me or anything to do with me. When I jump my knife cuts across my hand. I drop it and look at my hand then at Sean. "Wow, I knew you were stupid but wow." He said. I just looked up at him in pain. As he looked down at me grinning, his side buds walk from behind him one at each of his side. They just smile along with him. I sigh and bend down to grab the knife. As I bend down Sean says "do you even try?!" I grab the knife and stand up and say in a plain voice,"No". He just looses his smile and looks at me angrily, " I never thought you did but now it's official, you are really a looser". I just turn around and open my locker to think of another idea to get the pictures off my locker.
   I get a sharpie and draw all over the picture with broken hearts and crying faces, "this is better" I think to myself. I look at my hand again and look around me then check the time, I have 20 mins I can head to the nurse to get this cleaned. I close my locker and grab my books, which now has my blood on them. With my hand clenched into a fist to keep it from dripping blood I walk fast to the nurse.
   Oh my, what were you doing sweetie? I thought to myself what to say, " I was helping carry something and I scratched it on a corner" I said lying. "Well ok hun" said the school nurse. I walked with her to her room of supplies and she got some disinfectant wipes to clean it off then some bandages to keep it clean. After that I walked down the hallway to get to my first class because the nurse took a long time. I looked at people's faces as I walked by, they seemed dead, the same, all of them. Needing something. Something more.
   I get into my history class for advisory. "Alex, do you know who was the pope to excommunicate Martin Luther?" My history teacher Mrs. Rowland asked. I thought for a second. "Pope Leo the 15th?" I said wondering if I was right. "Yes" Mrs Rowland said surprised. I just sorta smiled and looked at my desk. I sigh quietly and look across the room. There he was, all tired and mopey just like me. Ryan was his name. He is at my bus stop. He lives pretty close. He has short blonde hair and big blue eyes. He's a dream.
*BRRINGGGGGG
The bell goes off and I rush over to my locker to get more books for my next class. "Shit!" I didn't finish the summary! I walk into my class and sit in my seat and stare down at my desk. I look at my hand and think to myself," once again, Why what am I doing this for?"
   In class I get yelled at by my jackass teacher and end up crying a little, no one was watching, it was quiet time after they yelled.
   I made it through the day without dying or running away, that's good. On the bus I spent my time sneaking looks at Ryan, I wish he would look at me but I'm not good enough, he deserves better than a ugly geek. After I look at him long enough I stare out the window and see a big red balloon, floating away. I for some reason felt connected to that balloon, as if we were the same in some way. Trying to escape. But at some point will break, it's inevitable. Death is inevitable.
   When I got home I threw my backpack to the side of the room and fell backwards onto the couch. Closing my eyes I think about what I have to do.

•homework
•feed dogs
•write in diary
•eat
   Ok I feed the dogs first petting Max my little white fluffy puppy and my lab Joy and throw their toys a few times. Then I go into my room to do my homework and check twice to make sure I did it all so I don't get yelled at again. After I finished my homework I walked over to my closet across the room from my bed and get my diary.

Dear Diary:Entry #1
  Today sucked, I wish Sean switched schools when he was born! He taped pictures on my locker and made me cut my hand! It still hurts super bad. I need to get some bandages later. Anyway I need to go eat.
<3 Alex
   I look around my kitchen and look in the pantry then fridge thinking of what I could make. Chips+cheese= nachos sure!
After I make those and eat them I go to my room and take off the bandage. It's all swollen and still bleeding. I sigh and grab some cloth from my art supplies and wrap it around my hand to cover it for now. As I wrap it it stings and opens a little more. I cringe in pain. Then it all just crashes on me, the pictures, the cut, my teacher, my life just adds up and I start crying, just a few tears.