Cannot Choose One (L x Reader x Light)

5

You laid on your stomach, scrolling through Tumblr. You were bored and there was nothing to do. You didn't feel like writing down names- actually, you haven't written one yet. Sighing, you continued scrolling until you paused at one post that caught your eye.

"Why you should be friends with each of the signs "

Hmm... Light is a Pisces, isn't he? February 28th?

You spot Pisces at the very bottom and read it in amusement.

"Pisces- Will give you advice"

Hmm... has Light ever given me advice on something before? You nod your head knowingly when you suddenly remember how the bags under your eyes were so dark that day, Light told you to do something... though you don't remember it.

Ah! Isn't L's birthday October 31st? Scorpio...

"Scorpio- Will be your partner in crime"

You snorted on this one. Would he? He didn't run away with me. Although he didn't run away with me, if a scorpio were to even be your partner in crime, wouldn't that make him loyal? Was L loyal?

You snapped out of your thoughts. This was just ridiculous. Did I actually believe in those silly zodiac, horoscope things? Of course they were false! How stupid...

You continued scrolling down when you're met with another post that caught your eye.

"The signs at school"

Hmm... What is L and Light like in school? You took a sip of the hot chocolate and nearly choked.

"Scorpio- The person who skips class to smoke weed in the toilet booth. Their wardrobe consists of: Black"

Okay, L hadn't skipped class or smoked weed. I can't even imagine the expressionless and weird L to be smoking weed and skipping class and suddenly so out of character. His wardrobe isn't all black, but you gotta say it was the same clothing all the time. A white long sleeved and jeans.

"Pisces- Spends their classes staring out of the window or sketching. Spends their break with friends"

Well, this wasn't half false. Light does stare out the window (don't ask me how I know) but I don't think he sketches... He does spend his break with me though. With education that always seemed to be there.

Amused, you found yourself looking more into astrology for about an hour or so until your phone started to ring.

"Hello?" You picked it up, not bothering to look at who the caller was.

"Hey" You knew who it was immediately.

"Hey, Light. What's up?" You ask. Your eyes not taking off the screen and your finger continuing to scroll down on Tumblr.

"Have you written a name yet?"

"Hm? Uh..." You glance nervously to your desk where the paper laid. There was no use in lying to him anyway so you bluntly said, "No".

The line went silent for a moment, "I see..." Your heart was racing in your chest. What was Light going to say? "I thought you were also striving for justice like me [Y/N], so why haven't you done anything yet?"

"S-sorry..." You stutter. He didn't sound mad, but he didn't sound calm either. Whatever emotion he was feeling right now, he was hiding it quite well and it scared you.

He sighs, sounding frustrated. Or exhausted. You could imagine him leaning back on his chair and rubbing the bridge of his nose as he held the phone in his other hand.

"[Y/N]" He breaks through your thoughts and you nearly yelp in surprise.

"Y-yes?" Your voice rose a few keys higher.

"Never mind..." he says reluctantly and you frown. Light was obviously hiding something.

"Li-"

"Listen, I gotta go. Bye." He says quickly and before you even got a chance to protest, he hangs up. You stare at your phone for a while before tossing it to your side and rolling to your back.

Light was drifting away, slowly. What happened? What happened to the bond we had? What happened to those innocent laughs and smiles that were only 3 weeks ago? Was he always like this? Sure he hated criminals as much as you did, but now... isn't this going too far?

Maybe what he's doing is right... Oh, I don't know anymore! Why am I wavering? This is obviously wrong!

Your mind's in chaos and you couldn't push everything aside. Although you wanted to, you couldn't. Are you helping your best friend? Not exactly but you're keeping it a secret. You should be trying to find L (although that's kind of impossible), and telling him what's happening now! It was so simple, but you couldn't do it. Light trusted you, and only you. You were the only one who knows and you didn't have to write names or anything to stay by his side. Well, for now anyway. He was just a friend and nothing more. Your first friend and you couldn't betray that, but was this helping him? Aren't you actually harming him? Aren't you actually making him worse? You're choosing your friendship over him? Does this even make sense?

You shut your eyes, trying to block out the thoughts and questions that attacked your head. Maybe the answer's right in front of you, but you couldn't see it. Instead, you were digging deeper and deeper, making everything more complicated when in reality, it was right in front of you. Maybe.

=====

You ended up falling asleep in an uncomfortable position. You didn't even know how you managed to sleep through it, but you did. You tossed around for what seemed like hours though before falling asleep like that.

Sighing, you walked through the doors to your classroom and is surprised to see something slightly different. There was a entourage group of people besides yours and Light's seat. You would usually walk over to see the commotion, but now you were too tired to let curiosity take over. So you walked over to your seat and sat down, waiting for Light to walk in through the doors.

As you were waiting, you couldn't help but overhear the conversation near your desks.

"Haha, Ryuzaki you're so cute!" A girl giggles sloppily. You frown a bit, hearing the unfamiliar name. You never heard that there was a new student. You're probably sleep deprived, you told yourself, but that wasn't enough to convince you.

Curious, you lift your head up and you meet a pair of dark eyes. Both your eyes widen at the same time as you stare into each other. It takes you a moment to realize that it was him. Your heart raced in your chest, and you're filled with surprise and excitement and confusion. 

At first, he looked at you like he was trying to remember a stranger but as his eyes widened, he seemed to remember who you were.

"[Y/N]?" He whispers your name in shock. He walks towards you as if to take a closer look and stops. The only thing that separated you two was your desk, but other than that, the world stopped turning.

What was happening? What is he doing here? How did he find you? Is Ryu whatever his cover name? 

Despite the thousand questions that popped into your mind, you felt alive just from the sight of him. L never failed to disappoint you. 

Except for that one time.