Neighbor // j.b feat. c.b [bwwm]

seven | cookies & conversations

"would i be bugging you if i asked to borrow some more sugar?"

It's been a week, maybe more since that little argument Chris and I had. It's been the same amount of time since I've talked to him. He won't call me, answer my calls or text me back and it was really getting to me. I feel like I cry everyday and I'm sad all the time now. All I do is sleep, eat, go to work and cry over how my boyfriend could ignore me for so long and not feel bad about it at all. I know he's not that busy. He still manages to post on instagram daily. At first I wasn't sure if it was really him posting since it was all professional tour pictures and promo, but once he started posting selfies and pictures with his friends I was fed up and sadder than ever. I wanted to try to cheer myself up so I was going to do the one thing I knew that could. I needed sugar to do it, though, so I texted Justin asking for it.

"of course not, i'll bring it over." was his reply. I hadn't talked to him since the day we hung out and just his text had me wishing we talked more. Maybe I wouldn't be so miserable if we talked everyday.

"thanks. the door is open." I replied. I went to the door to unlock it before going into the kitchen to start making the dough for the cookies I wanted to make. It was only a couple of minutes before I heard footsteps walking through my house. I saw Justin enter the kitchen out of the corner of my eye but I didn't even look up to greet him.

"What's up, Ivy?" he said. I saw him set the bag of sugar on the counter after he did.

"Hey." I turned around and went into my drawer to find the right measuring cup. I turned back around and added the perfect amount of sugar to my mix.

"What you been up to? We haven't talked in a while." he said.

"Just work." I said, shrugging. There wasn't much else to tell him.

He didn't speak for a while after I said that. I would've forgotten he was here if he wasn't leaning on the counter beside where I was working, facing me. It's like he was watching every move I made. Whether I was walking to the refrigerator or opening a drawer, I felt his eyes on me. You'd think I'd be used to his gaze by now, but I wasn't.

"You look like you've been crying... What's wrong?" he asked. I looked at him directly for the first time since he's entered my house. He had a concerned look on his face and his eyes were expectant, like he knew something was bothering me and that I'd tell him about it... He was right.

"I'm just.. Chris is mad at me." I blurted out. For some reason I felt like I had to tell him. Maybe I thought it was just because he asked or maybe I knew that if I kept this in I'd end up going crazy or just leaving town without a trace. Either way, I felt the need to confess to him all the emotions I've had since that phone call with Chris and maybe some from even before then.

"Why is he mad at you?" Justin asked.

"Because he tried to call me and I was with you the whole day. He thinks it's sketchy." I replied, rolling my eyes as I heard Chris' voice play in my head vividly. "I feel like he's overreacting. You're his friend and he brings me around you all the time, what, now that he's gone it's wrong to talk to you? He should trust me to not do anything that'd hurt him."

"Well, I guess it does sound kind of sketchy. And, knowing Chris, it's not even about you, it's about me being around you."

"So I can't be around men when he's not around? That's like saying don't leave the house; men are everywhere. He's around thousands of girls at every show and at least five after, depending on how many friends he has on his bus with him, and I'm not worried about him doing anything with them. Even when I know any of them would be more than happy to. I don't know, I just... I just expect the same amount of love and respect I give him to be reciprocated." I said. Justin didn't respond right away. He glanced at the floor for a few seconds before he looked back me.

"No, I understand. If he really expects you to not go out and be around people while he's gone, then he's crazy. You have a life to live, too." he replied. I swear it's like he just read my mind.

"Exactly! For once, I just want... I want to have fun and have friends outside of Chris that I really can trust. As much as I love him, I don't want my life to revolve around him anymore." I told him. I loved that I felt like I could really talk to Justin. I know he's not going to run and tell anyone and that he's going to listen and be as truthful with me as he can be. I'm so glad I have him as a neighbor. It felt good to get all of these feelings off my chest since I never talk about them.

"Then you should start going out and doing stuff that you like to do with.. or without him." Justin told me. I nodded my head.

"You're right... Thank you. I really needed that." I told him. He gave me a small smile.

"No problem, that's what I'm here for." He stood up straight afterwards and smoothed out his clothes before looking at me again. "I'm gonna go. Just call me, text me, if you wanna reach me."

"Oh, so you're Kim Possible now?" I said, smiling. He smiled back and licked his lips before he answered.

"I guess so. I'm always here to save the day, right?"

"Only once."

"Twice. Dont act like I didn't save you from a boring night at home and an even more boring day at work." he told me. I playfully rolled my eyes and he laughed. "You need me, Ivy. Don't try to act like you don't."

"Whatever. You said you had to go right?" I asked and his laughter got louder.

"Yeah, I do. I'm going to the studio.. you want to come?" he asked me.

"Uh, next time. I kind of really want these cookies I started." I told him. He nodded his head.

"Okay. I'll see you later." He put his hands on my waist and pulled me into his body for a hug that I wasn't expecting. My arms went around his neck to hug him back and when he released me I walked him to the door. I didn't realize until he left how badly I wanted to hang out with him. I spent the whole time I made my cookies missing his presence in the kitchen with me and the sound of his voice bouncing off the walls. I didn't understand why he had such a lasting impression on me all of a sudden, but I figured it was because it felt like he was becoming my friend, my only friend, here in LA.

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*wiggles eyebrows*  okay i'll leave.

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