The Stars And The Sun

end of summer

For the last few weeks of summer rebecca wasnt around as much which was gutting but relieving at the same time. It was gutting because I never got to see her but relieving because  that meant it wouldnt be awkward. So since rebecca wasnt around all I did was listen to music really loud as usual. Most of the songs I was listening to was by somo who is an amazing artist that writes and sings mostly songs about sex. When I listened to somo's music I dont know I kind of imagined me and rebecca in some of the situations. As I was thinking about her I had really good skate sessions because the thought of her kind of motivated me and throughout summer from skating every single day for so long I started to loose weight which I was happy about and I dont know I wanted to change for her I wanted to be skinnier because all her friends that are girls that I know are skinny so I wanted to be the same therefore the thought of her motivated me to put a lot into skating to loose weight. Now I know that sounds stupid because I was a size 12 in my tops and a size 12 in my jeans but everyone slagged me for my weight so I had the goal to be a size 8 like most girls. I waited and watched everywhere in the skate park just in case rebecca turned up but she never did and soon by every day waiting to see her it was the end of summer and she would be back to school while I was at college 3 days a week and all the others probrably never seeing her. That terrified me and I never wanted summer to end because she was my summer crush and I wanted it to continue.