Janie Tanner ~A Watty's 2019 Submission

Chapter 2

Danny was helping Joey get set up, so while he did that, Janie showed Jesse his new room, which was Stephanie's old room and covered in pink bunnies. Janie winced.
"Well, its roomy, quaint, not overly masculine." Jesse looked around.
"Oh golly, it's swell."he said sarcastically. 'You know what would look great over here by the window? Barbie's dream house." Janie gave her uncle a look.
"We've got one. And Uncle Jesse c'mon. It's not that bad. I'm honestly just glad your here. It's been too quiet without... mom...." Janie suddenly burst into tears. Jesse awkwardly came over and gave her a hug.
"I'm hugging you in a room with pink bunnies." She pulled herself together, wiping away the tears.
"Sorry. It's just still hard. I miss her." Jesse patted her on the shoulder.
"Okay. Jane, listen; your mom was my big sister, and I loved her very much, and I love you kids, and I'm happy to do what I can." Janie reached over and gave him a hug this time. "Aah, we're hugging again." He pushed her off and kept his hands on her shoulders. "Now listen; you and me, we'll sit down; we'll set aside a special time for hugging. But not now." Then he opened the closet to reveal that the closet rack was too low. "Oh great, I live in Webster's room!" Later, Janie and Danny went into Stephanie and DJ's room, where they found Stephanie hanging from the window curtain and yellow crepe paper that reached across the room, showing which side belonged to which girl. Janie looked on confused.
"Stephy, what are you doing?" Stephanie grinned.
"Just hanging around." Danny went over to her.
"Come on, honey, get down from there." Jusy as he was getting her down, Joey walked into the room. When he saw tbe yellow barrier, he smiled.
"All right!" He shouted excitedly. "Limbo. Dika-laka-puka... dika-laka-puka... dika-laka-puka..." then he danced right into the crepe paper and it broke "no way." DJ sighed.
"This is a nightmare." Danny looked upset.
"Uh, DJ, honey, I told you everything is gonna work out super great. I'm sorry. I've got to get down to the station. Try to watch my sports report this afternoon. Today starts my special two-part series entitled, "Boxers : Highly Skilled Athletes or Bullies in Shorts?"" Then he walked out and went to get ready for work. Even later that day, Joey and Jesse had heard Michelle crying and went to see what was wrong.
"Oh, Michelle, little baby waby." Joey said in a baby voice. "What's the matter? Uncle Jesse, what are we gonna do?" Jesse gave him a look and said,
"First, we stop talking like a munchkin." Michelle continued to sob. "Hey, shut up!" Joey held out his hands in a calming gesture.
"Wait, I'll handle this. I'm a comic; it's my non-paying job to cheer people up." Then he pitched his voice to sound like Kermit the Frog. "Uh, Michelle, it's me, Kermit the frog. Now, uh, you don't want to cry, do ya?" Michelle continued to cry. Joey scratched his forehead. "Wait, she'll love it. I call it, "The Sprinkler."" He picked up a glass of water, took a drink, and began spitting it out like a sprinkler. Jesse grabbed a little umbrella and covered both him and Michelle. Joey looked disappointed. "Tough room. Jesse, what if she needs to be... uh... changed?" Jesse gestured to the baby.
"Check it out. Go." Joey looked in side the diaper and groaned.
"We have a winner. Now what?" Jesse gave him a look.
'Joseph. Put yourself in her place. What would you want done?" Joey looked from her, to Jesse, then back to her, then at Jesse again.
"I've never changed a diaper."
"Me neither. At least you touched one. All right, look out; I'll show you how it's done." Then he spoke to Michelle, picking her up. "Come here child. You believe this guy?" Then he looked at Joey. "All right, make yourself useful." Joey sighed.
"I'll take the south end." He said, taking her legs and lower back while Jesse got her arms and upper back.
"Good." Then together, the two men walked down the stairs and into the front room on their way to the kitchen with baby, Jesse counting like they were dancing.
"Step one, step two, step one, step two, step one, step two, step one, step two." They ignored Janie and Stephanie, who were playing in the front room, but stopped to watch.
"Okay, good. Look out. Okay, keep it coming." Jesse called up to Joey. Stephanie looked at Janie and grinned at her.
"Showtime!" She said. Janie nodded and they followed the men into the kitchen. Stephanie saw the package of diapers and kicked them a little bit of the ways so that the men, nor Janie, would see them straight away. Meanwhile, Joey and Jesse were still talking.
"Where will we put the baby?" Jesse looked around, pondering this himself.
"Where will we put the child?" Joey gestured to a pot sitting on the counter.
"Uh, the pot, over here." Jesse gave him a look like he was nuts.
"Whoa... whoa... whoa... whoa... whoa... whoa! Joey, this is a living thing. You don't stick it in a pot; use a meat rack." Joey shook his head.
"I'm an idiot." Jesse gestured over to the meat rack sitting on the counter.
"Uh, come on."
"Okay." Then they continued to scoot over to the meat rack.
"All right, good." Jesse said slowly.
"All right, great." Joey said equally as slow.
"Settle down here; here we go." As they gently set Michelle down on the meat rack, Stephanie tilted her head.
"Are you gonna cook Michelle?" She asked them. Janie crossed her arms, smiling.
"We're changing her diaper." Janie tilted her head.
"Oh, then how do you roast a turkey?" She asked them. Jesse looked at them.
"Guys! Joey and I are busy. Joey, strip her. All right, careful there. You're in control. All right, slide it off and... ugh!" Joey picked up the dirty diaper and held it as far away from him as he could.
"Uh... uh... " Then he threw it in a bowl and put the lid on. Jesse watched him.
"Good thinking, Joey, keep it fresh." Joey nodded, then said,
"Okay, hold her up; I'll clean her off." Jesse nodded as he lifted her up and Joey picked up the sprayer from the sink.
"Good idea. Come on, Michelle, all right." Joey then tried to spray water at Michelle to get her clean, but he kept missing. Jesse kept shouting. "You're missing! You're missing! You're missing!" Finally, he got her clean and Jesse set her down. "All right now, come on, gently now, gently now, gently... There we go. This is great; we should be mothers." Joey nodded in agreement.
"Oh, yeah." Then Jesse said.
"All right, let's dry her up." Joey began to wave his hand like a fan.
"Okay. Fan her. Fan her fanny. Fan her fanny." Jesse began to do the same. Joey looked at him.
"You know these babies have it made? I would kill for this kind of service." Jesse nodded, then looked around.
"All right, diapers." Both men looked around, repeatedly saying diapers until Joey held up a roll of paper towls.
"Hey, super absorbent." Jesse gestured him over.
" Bring it over. Okay, now what?" he said.
"Okay, spin her." Joey said and they began to spin Michelle as they wrapped her up in the paper towels. Janie looked at them funny.
"Um, I'm not sure that's how you do it." She said. Stephanie nodded.
"Not bad, but next time try these." Then she held up the diapers. Both men and Janie looked at her.
"Steph, why did you wait till now to give us the diapers?" Jesse asked, exasperated. She shrugged.
"Nobody asked me. "