Run Away; C.R

(twenty-two)

[BEFORE YOU READ:

please note that i do not promote suicide, but the subject does take part in this chapter. it's a real life thing that real people go through and it's a terrible thing, but it's a part of my story.

BTW IF ANY OF YOU ARE FEELING DEPRESSED OR SUICIDAL OR EVEN JUST HAVING A BAD DAY, PLEASE DONT BE AFRAID TO MESSAGE ME OR KIK ME I LOVE YOU ALL DONT BE SHY!! ❀❀❀

okay, with that, you may read, enjoy!]

riley:

ironically enough, only about thirty minutes after I boarded the first bus, it began to rain. the pitter patter sound transported me back to the day that seemed like ages ago, but was actually only several months ago, when I first left maine. it was raining that day for most of my entire trip to atlanta, but the difference between that day and this one is that day, I was smiling as I counted the raindrops against the window; today I watch the clouds cry as my own tears drip along with them.

there's a baby wailing about two seats in front of me, and it reminds me of the days when jayden was at such a vulnerable and easy age. I cared for her while mom cooked dinner and dad was still hung up at work, though I, myself, was only four at the time. I remember the proud feeling that coursed through me every time I looked into her beautiful hazel eyes that were almost identical to mine. Little did I know she would grow up only to hate me almost as much as the bullies at school did.

there's two toddlers in the middle of the bus arguing over the transformer action figure, tugging it back and forth between their grasps as their mother pays absolutely no attention, flipping through the pages of her healthy meals magazine. the two boys look very close in age, both wearing matching blue tee-shirts and cargo pants with light up sketchers. They remind me of cage and brandon, mostly by the constant bickering between them, yet still never faltering the strong brotherly bond of their friendship. I remember the minute the two little boys got on the bus they were already back and forth about who was getting the window seat. I can't help but smile.

And something about the young, about mid-twenties, couple snuggled up together in the front row makes me think immediately of matthew and emily. I know they'll be together one day, most probably soon. they sneak glances at one another when the other one isn't paying attention. he looks at her like she's the stars in the sky, and she looks at him like he may just be the whole galaxy. I remember catching them holding hands once as we waited together in the hospital waiting room for results on chandler's bike accident. I truly hope that they one day admit their feelings for each other and become happy.

chandler was my first relationship ever, and at the time, it was as magical as I could imagine. of course, the relationship itself only lasted a short time, but the feelings and moments that occurred for long before that changed something in me. I used to think love was pitiful and pointless, or maybe I was just jealous that I was never going to find it. I might have loved chandler, but I won't figure that out now. I can only leave it at where I left it, which was a sweet, lovely something.

the bus pulls to a halt, shifting me in my seat and a new group of people start coming on, scattering into different seats and areas of the bus. By now, it's around lunch time, and it has begun to get a bit crowded. The last person to board the bus before the doors close behind him is looking around desperately for a seat. There is only one obvious seat open as of right now, and that's the one next to mine. He sees it instantly, hoisting the strap to the guitar case onto his broad shoulder and making his way towards me.