Imagines

Zayn Malik #1

"Zayn," you sigh as you open up your door to reveal your drunk boyfriend. He stumbles into your house and into the living room before collapsing on the couch. "You're drunk again."

It's not a question. It's a statement.

"I can't do this anymore!" the drunk man hiccups. "I can't! I can't!"

"Zayn, what are you talking about?" But you don't need to even ask. You already know the answer. You know.

"NIALL!" Zayn screams manically, causing you to cringe. Your calm demeanor begins to slip away and you feel the tears prick at your eyes.

No.

You can't cry in front of Zayn.

In the three months since *it* happened, you haven't shed a tear in front of your boyfriend. You refuse to start now.

"NIALL!" Zayn suddenly screams again, standing from the couch. "I HAVE TO SEE NIALL!"

"Zayn," you whisper, your voice breaking, "Niall is gone."

"I don't care," Zayn slurs, stumbling across the living room again. "'m gonna see him. Niall. My best friend."

You know exactly where he's going to go and you jump in front of him before he can, barricading the entryway to the kitchen with your body.

As you do, the three words that Zayn hates to hear escape your lips.

"Niall is dead."

Zayn lets out a shriek before falling to his knees. You wince and turn away, so he won't see the tears in your eyes.

"LET ME THROUGH! I NEED THEM!" Zayn screams. You know exactly what he's talking about.

Knives.

He wants the knives.

"Please," you whisper. You can feel yourself breaking down, both mentally and physically, and you don't know how much longer you can hang on. "He wouldn't want you to be like this."

Zayn falls silent. He stares at you, unblinking.

A tear rolls down your cheek. "I-I can't do this anymore, Z."

"What?"

"I c-can't! It tears me up inside to see you like this. You loved Niall, we all did. But you...seeing you like this terrifies me. I'm...I'm afraid of what you might do." You look down, refusing to look him in the eye.

Nothing happens for several minutes, but finally you feel Zayn's fingers under your chin. He lifts your face up so you have to look at him.

"Do I really terrify you that badly?" he whispers.

You sniffle and nod.

"Please," you beg him, "for me."

He stares into your eyes for a long time. Finally, he speaks.

"I promise, okay? I promise...I'll try to get better."