Starchela in LA

Chapter Fourteen: FIRST DATE

Chapter Fourteen - FIRST DATE

I must say, I want to Tweet for all the world to see, Shane's a dog! Crude, dude, totally crude! Will I ever trust a man again?

Walking down that hallway behind the giant driver is like walking to my execution. Legs are heavy, head is spinning. I cannot believe the trap they set for me! Using Shane as a spy! How does she know he's so important to me? How does she know I even know the guy? My God, the lengths that she went to reel me in! And the little twerp playing into it! I don't even know what he was supposed to get from me. He didn't have time to get under my skin – actually, he damn well did, that's why I'm fuming right now. Thank goodness the sulking driver interrupted him... or we could have gone too far.

Torquevald Nordon leads me back to the room where I met the mad queen of Bel Air. She's there again. She's changed her outfit. Flowing robes. Looks good on her. She's having a cocktail in a tall glass. It's already dusk outside. It's been a long day.

"Don't judge your friend too harshly," she says.

"He's not my friend!"

"You seemed pretty friendly to me."

"He's a dog. Actually, he's your little bitch."

"He's an aspiring actor. I'm a Hollywood mogul. There's no compromise he won't commit to please me."

"What a c..."

"I understand your frustration..."

"Do you? Why did you do it?"

"I want you. I want to show you that you have no choice but to stay with me. You have no one to go to."

And then it hits me – it cuts right through the fog of my rage and confusion, it gets clear as a bright sunny day. I tell her:

"You have no one to go to."

Her hand freezes for a moment, then continues carrying the glass to her L'Orealed lips. But I saw her freeze, I got my confirmation.

"I can always just pack up and go home," I continue. "You have nowhere to go. You need me."

"Fair enough. But the flip side is, you want to stay here. You want to stay with me, you want to know what I have in store for you. It's an adventure. You dig it."

She's seeing right through me, of course. The truth is, we're both right. So what are we going to do?

"What's in that cocktail?" I ask.

"Nordon, my niece wants a cocktail," she orders the Scandinavian driver.

After cocktails, we sit down for dinner. Downstairs, in a dining room as long as the dining room in an old Batman movie I saw as a kid. Only, Evangeline Lilly and I don't sit at the two far ends of the table but in the middle of it across from each other, so we're face to face.

While dinner is being served, word comes that Chandra is out of surgery. She may make it. My aunt goes off for a few minutes to dictate a press release wishing Chandra a speedy recovery. I haven't seen Shane since I left him back in the bathroom. He's a good actor, he'll get far.

The hors d'oeuvre is shrimp in avocado with mayonnaise sauce. White wine. Decorative candles. She is trying to seduce me. "First date with the mad queen. Am I about to lose my virginity?" I Tweet.

"It's not polite to text at the table," she says.

"Well, that's me."

"What are you texting?"

I shrug.

"Whom are you texting?"

I shrug again.