THE LOVE I CANNOT HOLD

10 - Caring in Silence

The rain gloomily covered the sun with dark clouds. I woke up happily today though the outside sky is bleak and sullen. I felt like I was a kid again. As I open my phone, I saw one message. Sena must have missed me a lot. And me thinking that way made my heart go jumping in glee.

Babe, its raining hard. Don't get yourself wet. :-* -Rische

I was dismayed a bit. It's a shame it was not the person whom I expected.

As I was recalling our happy night together, I can't help but think what could she be doing right now. It won't hurt the world if I call, would it? Im sorry but I'm really not at peace less I hear her angelic voice.

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It's been five hours now and I was not able to hear anything from her. I can't focus on my job and art enthusiasts seem to question the mixed facts I tell. I think I should pay Rische a visit in school and drop at Sena's homeroom to end this loophole of misery.

"Babe? You surprised me a lot! What's the reason behind this bolt from the blue visit?" Rische was really surprised beyond expected.

"I brought you a snack." My smile was thrift. I'm sorry Rische. Your smile may have been precious to me but it's not the reason I'm here for.

"Come on in babe!" Rische invited me.

"Im sorry babe. But I just came to drop by and say hello to my beautiful girlfriend."

"You ignited my day, baby. Thanks. I feel so lonely throughout the day because Sena was absent and I -"

"She's absent???" I was in shocked. It must have been because of last night! I knew that something is wrong!

"I see you're shocked. Same here. She values her job a lot and a little cold and cough won't stop her from coming. We planned to visit her later. Want to come?" Rische had no clue but I think I must go and see her first. This is all my fault. If only I had not yield to her childish decision to play in the rain. Her job is the only thing she had. I can't just destroy it.

"I forgot something at work, babe. I must go now." I excused.

"You're pale. Are you okay baby?" She tried to reach for my forehead but I kissed her cheeks instead.

"It will take a hurricane to make me sick."

And off I drove to her apartment. I knocked many times only to find out the door is open. I entered her apartment without any hint of inducement.

"Sena? Sena? Are you home Sena?" The sound of my voice vividly showed the worriness that took over in a span of minutes.

Her apartment has only two rooms. One belongs to the bathroom and the other leads to a dark room. I entered the dark room without authorization and turned the lights on to gain sight of what's inside.

Sena was sleeping so soundly in it. She looks a bit red and I knew right away she is having fever. I did not disturb her or anything. I went to the kitchen and cooked something for her to eat. She must have not eaten anything considering her ill condition.

She woke up to the sound of the plates clattering when I saw her peeked by the door of her room. Her eyes were wide in surprise and with a hint I spoke

"I was worried when I didn't hear anything from you so I dropped by to see how you were doing. You should have called and informed me your state. You have me, you know." My expression is pained and hurt. She must have treated me as a nobody so she hid her condition from me.

"This is what I hate seeing. I don't want to paint a sad look in your face. I want you to have fun without worrying."

"I'm the artist here. I should be the one painting your world with laughters".

There was silence in the room and I know she's sorry for it.

"Enough with this kind of talk. Let's talk more about us when you are well." I ended the conversation there.

Then I approached and carried her in my arms leading to her bed. She was too weak to protest and I kissed her lips in assurance that I will not let her do the housework neither move a bone. Her smile is frail. I spoonfed her and just when she was full, she took all her energy in getting up and she kissed me. It was passionately short.

"I'd like to marry you." I can see the determination right through her. I kissed her back passionately.

"I must go before the teaching staff catch me here. They'll visit you in a moment. I'll be back tonight. Okay?" I bade her goodbye.

"Please promise me you'll be back." She worriedly wants assurance.

"Yes. By hook or by crook. Do you want anything? I'd nurture you back to health." I shyly announced my last sentence.

"It would make me happy. Sorry for the place. I was too busy kissing you that I forgot cleaning it." We both stiffened a short laugh which clearly marks disquietude.

I tucked her to bed before leaving.