Not About Angels (Hayffie)

Chapter five

Effie POV

I just kissed him.
Not even Properly. Just on the cheek. But I kissed him.

I disappear back into my bedroom, leaning against the door I order a cup of hot chocolate, and wait for Dahlia to bring it to me.
When she enters, I have the boards ready.
Where did you disappear off to? Dahlia writes.

I was talking to someone... I answer.

Hang on, I know that smile. It was a boy, wasn't it? Dahlia nudges me.

Yes. I write, looking at her.

Who was it? She asks

When I don't answer, she understands.

It was one of those Tributes wasn't it?!

She doesn't need to wait for an answer.
Effie! That is like... Illegal! If anyone finds out, you could be like me! An Avox! What would your mother say?!

Well, that would only happen if anyone found out! And. They. Won't. I look at her, making sure that she understands that she isn't going to be the one who tells.

And then my mother walks in. She doesn't even notice Dahlia, just heads over to the huge mirror.
That gives time for Dahlia to escape, and for me to slip the boards behind my bed.
"Euphemia, darling!" My mother says.
"Mother." I reply.
"Are you going to be a good little girl now?" I am about to argue that I am not a 'little girl', but I just smile.
"Yes. How are you?" I force the words, because frankly, I don't care.
"Oh Love, I am great! I think we might finally have some fighters this year! Or at least one fighter. The male tribute... Haymitch, I think his name is, he seems to have... quite an attitude. Although, he could work." As soon as my mother mentions him, I pay attention.
"Why do you think that Mother?" I ask innocently.
"Oh, I am not quite sure myself, but I can feel it. In my shoes." I almost laugh. I glance down at her sparkly pink 7 inch heels. She couldn't feel anything in those.
"Oh. That must mean something Mother. I mean, if you can feel it in your shoes, that means something! " I exaggerate.
"Oh yes. It must!" She smiles, adjusting her wig.

The next morning, I actually make an effort. But my effort is not good enough for my mother.
"Love, don't you think that's a little bit, well, dull? I am sure that we can find you something to wear!"
''That is very kind of you mother, but I am fine wearing this." I say.
When she leaves for breakfast, I follow along behind her.
The tributes look sleepless and all of them except Haymitch, look like they have been crying.
He catches my eye, and I give him a slight smile.
"Good morning! We have a big big big day today! Today is the day where we arrive in the Capitol!"
She pauses. "This is my Daughter, Euphemia." Thats all she says. That's all that she introduces me as. My daughter Euphemia. Thats all she thinks of me. I'm just her daughter. Nothing more, nothing less. Just. Her. Daughter.
Well. She's just my mother. I think to myself. That's fair.

I sit across from Haymitch. He stares at the table, apart ftom the occasional glance towards me.
My mother chirps about what to expect in the Capitol, but I just block her out.
Haymitch's leg gently brushes mine. An accident? No. It was too... gentle. It is hard to stop the smile from appearing on my face. I try to conceal it, to the best of my ability.
I eat a breakfast that I would never usually eat. I drink hot chocolate, with cream, marshmallows and chocolate sauce. Once I have had enough, I ask my mother if I may be excused.
"Of course. Darling! Would you please go alert the avoxes to have a bath ready in an hour?" She asks.
"Yes." I hate how she doesn't even bother to learn their names. They are real people. With real lives. Well, maybe not. But they did have lives. Families. With real feelings. Real names. That have only become what they are out of desperation. Hunger. The Capitol don't treat the districts well. Only district Two, that is whhere all of the Peace Keepers come from.
The only reason I alert her Avoxes, is because I don't want them to get hurt.

I make my way towards the back of the train, where there is a room with just windows. That open up. The breeze is amazing.
"So that's who you are!" Haymitch's voice floods the room.
"Our Excorts daughter."
"I wish I wasn't though." I murmer.
"Why? You have everything you could ever need!" Haymitch says.
"In some aspects, yes I do. But I think that you would be surprised." I say quietly.
"It would take a lot to suprise me." He says.
The silence that follows is comforting.
"You must have a flood of boys back in the Capitol. "Haymitch guesses.
"No, I don't. " I admit.
"That suprises me."
"Why?"
"A beautiful young girl like you, surely."
"No ones ever called me  that before." I whisper.
"Well, I don't know why, because you are, well...you are without all that Capitol crap on you."
I laugh. "I agree. "
"Have you... ever...kissed anyone before?"Haymitch asks.
I take a deep breath,
"Well, I kissed you almost...but no." I say nervously.
He seems to consider something for a while.
"Can I... can I kiss you?" He says Quietly.
"Go ahead."
The kiss is... I don't even know. It is beautiful.  In it's own way.
"You know, if anyone finds out about this... I don't even want to think about what will happen." I ruin the moment.
"What can they do? I've already been sentenced to death,  and I will not let them hurt you. Okay?'' Haymitch gently pushes the hair away from my eyes.
"You have to win. Please Haymitch.  Just try to win. Please. Come home to me." I beg him.
"Of course. I will try to win. For my Effie." He kisses my forehead. 
"I'll get you sponsers. Anything. Just. Try. To. Win. You can win. I have seen the other tributes. But...I am so young, and your older than me... and-" Quick subject change,  but I am cut off by Haymitch's lips.
"Don't worry. Just live in the moment. We are fine. It's only like Two years.  That's not much. "His smile is so kind, so genuine,  and I love it.

*****
Okay. So I published this Chapter, but then I realised that like 200 words deleted itself,  so I unpublished it again. So sorry, but i think that it is...omg. the feels. Anyway, hope that you had a great Christmas.