Break the Unbreakable

Chapter Fifty Three

I checked my phone for the seventh time to ensure that I had gotten the time right and read the name correctly:

Harry: Meet in the music room at 5:00pm.

I was surprised to see that when I first got it. I didn't expect that the gala was going to be happening, or that he was going to practice with me anymore. In fact, my heart jumped at the mere fact that his name was printed in my message.

The time on my phone read 5:05 pm. Not a big deal - he's five minutes late. However, it was different right now, because each second that passed felt excruciatingly long.

I took a seat at the piano bench, sighing.

At that moment, the door swung open, and I scrambled to my feet. Harry's eyes found mine, and no words came out of my mouth. I should say hello or something...but I was speechless. I didn't want to speak because anything that came to mind sounded stupid in my head.

"Hey" or "How are you?" or "Are you okay?" all warranted really bad answers.

"Let's get started," he said, clearing his throat.

Let's get started on...what? I assumed he meant practice, but I thought we would have a bit of a pre-amble as to why we were meeting when we left on such a bad note.

"Okay..." I responded, slowly.

"The gala is this weekend." His tone was harsh.

"Harry," I said. "I just...I don't want you to force yourself to practice with me. I know you don't want to."

"Blake, just play the song -" he started.

"No," I cut him off. "I won't. I won't do something that's going to make you uncomfortable or hurt or depressed."

"Who cares? This is not about me. This is about entertainment for the people at the senior home -"

"Screw that!" I shouted. Now, I realized that saying "screw that" about a bunch of innocent elderly people probably bought me a one-way ticket to hell, but I couldn't really care less.

He remained silent, waiting for me to continue.

"I don't want you to be in the same room as me if you don't want to be," I argued. "I don't want you to feel like you have to sing with me. I know how good of a singer you are - you could do the entertainment by yourself. You don't need me."

He shook his head.

"That's not the point..." he grumbled.

"Harry, then, I'm confused. I don't understand why you still want to perform with me -" I said, my eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

"Oh, come on, Blake.

"No, I honestly don't know why you'd want me to -"

"God," he muttered. "You really don't get it do you?"

We stared at one another, and my eyes were widened with curiosity and perplexity. I honestly had no idea what he was going on about.

He took in a deep breath and started to explain.

"Blake, I'm not forcing myself to be here at all," he continued. "In fact, I want to be here. I look forward to it - which is so messed up."

"But you were five minutes late...you don't seem to eager to want to do this."

"Because I don't want to be too obvious about it," he said.

"About what?" I pried.

"About how I still am in love with you, and I can't stop it," he shook his head, walking towards me.

"I don't understand -"

"Neither do I," he interrupted. "I don't get why I can still be in love with you after finding out the truth. But, I am. And I want to keep practicing with you because I need you. I need to be in the same room as you, I want to see you - it's...like a drug."

I silently nod, pressing my lips together. I don't want to say anything at this point. It wouldn't help anyone if I told him that I was still in love with him too.

"And every time I try to make myself hate you, try to remind myself of the assignment, I just keep on thinking and refuting all of that. Because something just makes me love you. And I don't know what it is."

"Harry, I wish I could do something to help..."

"No," he said, shaking his head. "This is me. This is me doing this to myself. It's not smart at all. But I guess love makes you do dumb things."

"Stop it," I said, shaking my head. "Stop. I don't have to be here. We don't have to do the gala, I can pull myself away. I can help you let it go. Because I don't want you to be this destroyed by something."

"No, I can't. I wouldn't let you go or leave even if you tried."

We stood in silence. There was physically nothing that I could do to tell him that it was going to be okay.

"Blake, I really want to go back and pretend like I didn't know. A part of me wishes I never found out. But that's not reality. I know."

"Harry," I refuted. "Come on. Please, just forget it! Forget about the assignment. And know that I actually do love you. I fell in love with you. Why the hell can't you see that?"

"I want to believe it, but if I do just forget about what happened, then that's like forgiving you for what you did -"

"Harry, you did the exact same thing!"

"I never wanted to break her!"

"Then what did you think you'd do when she found out?" I shouted back.

"I didn't love her like I loved you! I haven't loved anyone ever until you!"

We were just screaming at each other, and I didn't know what to reply to what he just said.

We both fell quiet, and he just stared at me with those eyes piercing into mine. And I didn't move at all. He and I just glared at one another, hating that we were going in circles. That nothing could fix this.

And then, all of a sudden, his arm found its way around my waist. He pulled me close to him.

Without any thought, he just kissed me.

And our usual gentle, tender and intimate kiss wasn't what he had in mind. Behind it, there was a forcefulness I've never experienced. Like he was trying to give me all his pain and hurt and sorrow, expecting thatI could make it disappear. And I wish I could.

I kissed back, my hands entangled in his hair. But also, behind the kiss was a sort of crazy passion of raw emotion that was indescribable.

He pulled away from me, a wild look in his eye.

I don't know what I was expecting him to say, but I was expecting at least something to explain for his sudden outburst.

But he offered me nothing. He simply turned around and left, shutting the door behind him.