Gone........I must have replayed that word half a million times in my head. Why was everything that I loved gone? That was a question that I had asked my self since I was 5, when my dad left. Left........ Why was I the one always being left. Why was I the one always being hart. Why was I the one......... the one losing people, people I cared about. I want to be the girl with the perfect life, the perfect family, the perfect friends. I'm done with being the girl who has no one, nothing, not even her dad. I'm done with being the person who gets left. I think it's time that I be the one who leaves.
It's not like I'll miss anything or like anyone will miss me. Maybe my friends but then again they've got each other. Maybe my mom........ what about mom. Maybe she feels the same way. Well if she does, she does a good job at hiding it. It's not like she did anything to deserve this, to have a daughter, to but left by the father of her child, to have to raise me all by herself.
I hate to have given her a burden as big as that, but it's my dad who should feel guilty. I wish I would have done something to help her with this but I just didn't know how. I was so mad at her because I thought that she was the reason he left, but it wasn't her it was him. He's the one who cheated on her, he's the one who lied to her and he's the one who never loved us.
He met a girl when he was still with my mom. He got the girl pregnant and left us to be with her and the baby. I always knew that he didn't love me I just always had a little bit of hope. Hope that he would love me and my mom after all. But as you can see that didn't happen or I would still have a dad. Why did he have to be such a jackass. That would be one of the only question I would ask him if I ever saw him again. But that won't ever happen, at least as long as my mom's around.
