Argh. I have roamed around town and back twice and I finally settled for sitting alone at the park. I hear the ring of my phone and see the caller ID as 'Dad' I do the obvious and put my phone on silent to ignore his calls. I can't believe he would try to do that to me. He wants to take my birthday party away from me because his bimbo fiancé wants me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding. Lidia convinced me to go the wedding at least to avoid scandals. Now he just flew that out the window, completely. He can just go ahead and play happy families. I turn eighteen in three months and on my birthday I move in with Tia and her folks till I get my money that my mother left me.
So here I am sitting alone on a Sunday night in the local park. I look at the wall and smile at the vandalism written 'ILYM' meaning I Love You Mom. I remember writing that with a can of spray paint the month after my mom passed away. It was around that time that things started changing in my life. I had no control over my emotions. I was no longer the happy preppy girl anymore. I mean having your mother die during your junior year can be pretty frustrating and painful. At that time though I had my dad, Tia, Lidia, Zach and Joshua (Tia's dad) they all understood me and I understood them. Then suddenly my dad met a woman they always brushed of my questions about their relationship and said that they were just friends and now they are bloody getting married. Th rage inside me just wants to burst out and do something anything to get the weight of my shoulders.
I grab my phone and text Tia telling her that I'm coming over but first I have to go home and grab a few things.
I hop into my car and speed of towards my house. If I was going regular speed it would have taken me about thirty minutes but the way I was feeling I got there in fifteen. I see that the door is locked when I get there. Wow they don't care if I were locked out. Whatever. I use my personal key and open the door.
As I enter I realize that my father and his fiancé are sitting down in rocking chairs just watching the door. This feels just like the Godfather the only thing that they are missing is the fluffy white cat and the big cheeks.
I am pretty sure that they are waiting for me. As I close the door behind me. I begin to walk past them to my room when my dad calls my name. As bad girlish as I may be I still have manners. And I still have respect.
I turn around and stare at him. I am ready for whatever crap he has to say. I know that everything that I keep saying makes me sound dramatic but my life is not that peachy you know.
"Where were you? We were worried sick about you Elle." Katherine says in an angry motherly tone.
"Don't you dare callee Elle again. My mother was the only person with that right and you are not her and you will never be her. You don't even come close to being her. And who asked you to be worried sick about me. I'm a big girl I can handle myself. I don't need someone like you trying to be there for me. Are we clear. Good" I say as if she actually gave a reply. I turn my head to see my angry looking father.
" Why are you looking at me like that dad?" I ask cluelessly. I don't think mad because of what I just because I didn't say anything rude and untrue. So I don't know what his problem is.
"Why are you behaving like this. This is definitely not the girl I raised. Do you hate Katherine that much or is it me you want to punish.. You have been acting way out of line lately." My dad says sorrowfully.
I don't know if he still doesn't get it. I don't mind him getting married. I know it seems it seems like the idea of him getting married. Actually I don't, but I don't mind it much. It's the fact that he did all of this without asking how I felt. Ever since this Kathy woman and her kids came into our lives I hardly see my dad. He never asks how my day might have been anymore. I mean four months after my mother died I tried committing suicide ( stupid I know) but dad still hasn't realized. I just don't like the idea of losing another parent. He never has time for me anymore.
"Why did you try commit suicide? My dad asked. How did he know.
"Honey, you just said everything out loud. Why didn't you tell me that that is how you felt?" My father says softly.
" I tried telling you but it became difficult when you started seeing Katherine. Then she introduced you to her kids and then it was like you had gotten a better full family and like I didn't matter." I feel tears from my eyes as I say this. I remember when it happened I tried to slot my wrist. I was so close to the blood flow when Zach walked in. I managed to cut but it wasn't deep enough. He took me to the hospital. I remember walking around with a bandage around my wrist for five weeks and my dad never noticed. Since Katherine got involved in my life my dad hasn't even asked my about my life. He hasn't even given me a hug. But he gives Mia hugs all the time and calls her sweetie.
All the thoughts running through my head now are making me dizzy.
I have to get to Tia's house now she's waiting for me. I trudge my way up the staircase. I was on the fifteenth step when suddenly everything went black.
****¥*****¥******¥******¥******¥*****¥*********
I open my eyes and all I see is white. This is definitely not my room. I sit up with a bit of a struggle but I get up all the same. I look around my room and I realise that my father and the Jacobsons are sat all around the room.
Tia is the first to notice that I am awake.
"Oh thank heavans. you scared me so so much. we were all scared shitless especially Zach. Literally he was constipated for the whole three days you were out." Tia babbles. I can't helpbut laugh when she tells me about Zach. I can't believe it. At least I know how much he cares.
The doctor came in and said that I was free to go. What is the hospital a prison now or something.
Me, Tia and Zachary were all in my room just relaxing. We hung out until about ten o'clock and then they each needed to get home.
Around mid night I went to get a snack, when I heard whispers. I followed the voices when I heard my dad and Katherine. They were talking about canceling the wedding for now. I could hear my day's sad voice.
"Kathy it isn't like we will never get married but you heard the doctor he said that Dani is stressed and if we stress hr too much she could go into a much more critical state. I want to marry you as soon as possible. It breaks my heart that we can't but honey please understand." It broke my heart to hear his voice like that. It reminds me of when mom died his voice was sadder but this came pretty close.
It is then that I decide my stupid antics won't change anything.
"You should get maried dad. If this makes you happy. You deserve a better family. I think I'm going to stay at Tia's for a while. I really need a break." I say. They don't realize it's me until they switch the light on.
My dad immediately tries to shoot down the idea, but I stand firm.
I feel hot tears slowly spill from my eyes. I just feel like I betrayed my mother, you know.
I rushe to my room and call Tia she asks me why I'm coming over. I tell her she will know when I get there.
I rushed out of the house with my suitcase and car keys. But before I got to the car my dad stopped me.
"Dani, please you don't have to do this." My dad says softly.
"I do have to do this. You want to be happy and you can't do that of I'm here. I will feel like I've betrayed mommy. I can't live with you or myself if I stay here and watch you guys play happy family with Kathy and your new kids. Look dad I love you but I have to do this for myself. I don't think I'm going to come back. But please do one thing for me and make sure Katherine doesn't change anything in this house. Please." That is all I say before I slip past him to my car.
I jump in and drive off to Tia's house.
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