Kingsbane

Chapter 29

     They'd only been in the carriage for ten minutes before Grayson began to nod off. Siva watched him fight it for a few moments, and patted his thigh. "Rest, if you're tired." He whispered softly. "We have a little ways to go yet."
    "No, it's alright." Gray denied, not wanting to become the damsel in the relationship, though in reality there were no other roles left for him to play. "I always get tired in the car. Well, carriage."
    "Don't be stubborn." Siva whispered, pulling out a small compartment in the door and retrieving a wooden box of hand-rolled cigarettes. "You should really lay down for a little while. You'll need the energy for our activities."
    "Activities?"
    Siva gave him a wicked grin and lit his cig. "We have to enjoy summer before Sio kills it." He stated, taking a long draw, holding the smoke in his lungs as he continued, patting his leg again, more insistently this time. "Can you swim?"
    Gray lay down and instantly regretted it. Siva held his cigarette with one hand, and began to stroke his hair with the other. The combination of the tender petting, the warmth of the Fae's body, and the rocking of the carriage left him very little chance of remaining awake. "I can." He answered softly, closing his eyes defeatedly. "But I don't have any swim trunks."
    "You're so fucking cute." Siva snorted, hitting his smoke again and watching the countryside go by out the window. Glancing down at the boy in his lap, he tried to fight his despair. In a hundred years, would he be able to recall his face? The sound of his voice? The feel of his skin? Experience told him no, and his stomach turned at the thought.
    It didn't matter what he did, he could not free himself from the grief. Maybe if he had the security of a photograph, or article of clothing perhaps he could at least breathe without having to force air around the ever-present lump in his throat. If he just had something to hold on to, anything... But there was nothing. When Gray was gone, that was it.
    He felt nauseas. If it weren't for the semi-soothing effects of his tobacco he'd have already been sick. He took another lungful of smoke and continued to run his fingers through his Bane's hair. This was just going to have to be enough.
    "Your Grace, we are approaching the pond, shall I park on the path?" The driver called back, slowing the horses.
    "Go around the hill a few times first." Siva instructed.
    "Yes, Your Highness."
    As the horses sped up again, Siva continued smoking, trying to rid himself of negativity by losing himself in the scenery. Grayson needed him to be strong. If only it was as easy to Glamour away his emotions as it was his scars.
    The carriage continued on it's rocking course and his cigarette soon burnt away.     Resting his head on the door, he couldn't help but close his eyes. Perhaps Grayson was not the only one who needed a nap. Placing his arm around the boy's shoulder, he allowed himself to drift off, praying a nightmare wasn't waiting for him.

                                                           * * * *

    Grayson nearly rolled off the seat as the carriage came to a halt. He landed with a dull thud on the floor. "Shit." He grumbled, sitting up groggily and returning to the seat.     Siva sat with his head lolling to the side, the butt of his long dead cigarette still perched precariously between his long fingers. His pale hair curtained his eyes, and his lips parted just enough to be sensual. Or maybe that was just his face. It wasn't even fair to be so good looking, having that gorgeous jawline and those perfect cheek bones at the same time. Good god, it was as if he'd fallen straight off the page of a Playgirl.
    Just as he was about to begin salivating, the driver opened the carriage door and Siva fell out with an ungraceful flop, followed by a slew of curses and a desperate litany of apologies from the frantic servant. Grayson laughed. He couldn't help it. He laughed until he couldn't breathe. It was especially hard to calm down when Siva popped back up in the carriage doorway, his hair disheveled, dirt on his face and an uncharacteristically red face.
    "Well, I'm glad your amused." The Fae muttered, "Shall we go? Or do you need a minute to recover?"
    "A minute." Gray gasped. "Leaf- there's a leaf in your hair."
    Siva couldn't even be offended, and after removing the foliage from his hair, he smiled. He realized this was the first time he'd hears Grayson laugh sincerely before. Offering the boy his hand, he helped him out into the sunshine and then turned to his insistently apologetic driver.
    "Meet us back here before dusk, and not a moment sooner."
    "As you wish, Your Majesty." The man bowed and scurried into his seat. "Again, I'm so sorry."
    Siva dismissed him with a shooing gesture and then took Grayson by surprise by scooping him from the ground like some fragile maiden. "What the hell are you doing?"
    "I just assumed you may be tired after all that laughing."
    "I'm fine. Let me go."
    "Don't be a brat. You'll ruin the romance."
    Grayson frowned, but did not protest further. He'd come to find that arguing with the Faery King was just a waste of energy. Instead he rested his head on his shoulder like a good little damsel and let the other man carry him off the road and into the greenery by the wayside.
    "Av, Sverre, and I used to played here as kids. Our parent's house wasn't far from here." Siva stated as they came into a clearing, within which sat a large, crystal clear pool of water. On it's far end there were piles of big, white marble-like rocks and a small waterfall that cast rainbows in the sunlight over them. "We met Rafferty here."
    He sat Grayson down and moved to the edge of the water. Gray stared down into the clear water with him. It was so pristine that he could see he glittering fish swarming in small schools and the vibrant green plants swaying with the current. It all looked to be about the same depth, except for a large spot to the left. There it was black, like a rain cloud beneath the water. "What's down ther- what are you doing?"
    Siva looked up from his shirt's last button, innocently. "Well, I'm not going to swim in my clothes." He nodded to the shadowy place. "There's a cave down there." His shirt dropped to the grass and his pants quickly followed. Apparently they didn't wear underwear in Faery.
    Grayson immediately felt self-conscious. He'd never been one to compare himself to others, but with Siva it was different. The Fae was beautiful, and what was he? He was a pale, bruised up, wraith of a person. He'd never been completely naked, in broad daylight, in front of any one, ever, let alone someone so sinfully perfect.
    "What's the matter?" Siva inquired, wading into the pool, splashing water up his arms, and slicking his hair back like some god damned super model.
    "Nothing." Gray muttered, removing his shirt, trying to save his ego while his confidence died a slow, horrid death. As he slid his pants down past his hips, he realized just how much weight he'd lost.
    Siva was waiting a few feet off the bank, green eyes concerned. "Are you not up for it?" He inquired, started out of the water.
    "I'm fine." Gray assured him, kicking off his shoes and walking into the water, not able to look up at the other man waiting for him. He hated this feeling. It was a feeling he'd never bothered to feel before now. He'd never felt the urge to impress anyone. He was dying, Siva understood that. There wasn't any reason to feel ugly or disgusting. If only his heart was as sensible as his mind.
    "Grayson." It was a reprimand, but Gray pretended not to hear him, focusing on the pleasantly cool water and the smooth sand between his toes. What he'd first thought were fish, began to congregate around him. They were little humanoid creatures, much like Pai only where she resembled a flower, they resembled little silver fish, or tiny mermaids.
    A green pulse ran through the water and they scattered. That was enough to get him to look up again at his companion. "Does this make you feel more comfortable?" Siva questioned, holding out his arms as his Glamour ran off of him like the water he stood in.
    Grayson had never imagined the extent of which his lover was marred. His entire right side was covered in dark red and purple markings. One could clearly see the outlines of the weapon mapped out across his skin. It made him sick to think of the pain he had endured.
    "I just want to clarify," He hissed, "I slit that motherfucker's throat and didn't feel a damn bit bad about it."
    Siva laughed softly and held open his arms. "My hero."
    Grayson went out to him and allowed himself to be swallowed in an embrace. Already Siva was nibbling his ear and saying things in that sweet foreign language in his bed-room voice. He could see where this was going and he only hoped he had the stamina to get there. With cautious fingers, Gray touched the scars on Siva's chest, following them up to his jaw-line. Poor Siva. Even at home, he had to hide his true face.
    "Hold your breath, and don't let go." Siva demanded suddenly into his hair. "And kick your feet."
    "Wait-"
    He didn't wait. Grayson managed to grab a large breath of air before he was forced beneath the water. He clung to Siva as the Fae torpedoed them toward the dark, open mouth of the underwater cave. The little silver mermaid-beings followed them, crowding around his face and tangling themselves in his hair, but he could not swat them away and keep his hold on Siva at the same time.
    As his lungs began to burn, he was relieved to discover that the creatures were their to help him. One by one they zipped to the surface, returning with a little bubble of air that they carried along with them until he needed them. Then they'd shove them up his nose. It was an utterly strange sensation, but he was able to breathe that way, though he wasn't sure how. It was magic, and he'd simply stopped questioning it at this point.
    As fascinating as the experience had been, he was greatly relieved when they surfaced. It was much cooler, and pitch black inside, but he could tell it was a large space by the way the sound of Siva panting as he helped him up onto dry land echoed along the unseen walls.    
    "You okay?" Siva huffed, taking a firm hold of his hand.
    "Yeah." He breathed, "But, I can't see."
    Siva barked out a command in his language and a dim glow began to radiate from the stalactite above. As the light grew brighter, Gray looked up to see more small creatures buzzing around the dripping cave formations. They seemed to be spreading a fluorescent substance all across the ceiling.
    "That's spit." Siva explained. "It has a sort of chemical reaction with the rock, causing it to glow like that. It'll only last a few minutes though."
    "That's gross." Gray whispered. "And awesome."
    "Yes." The King agreed, "This is where Rafferty used to live. We found him, practically wild, down here. He was only six or seven."
    "Why would he live here? What happened to his parents?"
    "I don't know. He doesn't remember." Siva sighed, reaching out and pulling him back to him. "We would each sneak a little of our dinner into our pockets and then one of us would come here after dark to feed him. It took two weeks to coax him to the surface, and two months before we heard him speak. That was about the time my father found out what we'd been up to. After that, he came to live with us."
    "That's crazy. You'd never know it from looking at him."
    "Well, we did a pretty good job of making him into a gentleman. You cold?"
    Grayson shuddered as the other man ran a hand down his back and pressed his hips against his own, sharing his heat and at the same time his arousal. Gray groaned as Siva cupped his balls and massaged a thumb into his perineum. His back was pressed against a cold stone wall, and Siva's other wicked thumb hand begun to dance playfully around his left nipple.
    "You make a guy want to die more often." He muttered as Siva nibbled his neck.
    "Shush it, brat." He growled, quieting any reply he may have had with his mouth.
    Not wanting to be outdone, Gray wrapped his hand around Siva's dick and began to tease and stroke until he had the man moaning into his mouth. The Fae bit his lip as Grayson's thumb flicked across his wet tip, his green eyes becoming fluorescent, his slit pupils contracted.
    It seemed it had suddenly become an unspoken competition to see who could get the other to orgasm first. It was a nasty little game, one they may have been ashamed of had they had to face their mother's or their god at that moment. Seeing as they had to do neither, the played hard, and ruthlessly.
    Grayson was sure he was about to win, when Siva's arousal suddenly lessened and in the dim, greenish glow he saw the tears rolling down the Faery's cheeks. "Grayson," He sighed, "I didn't bring you here for this. I didn't bring you here to make you my whore. When I am near you I can't help but touch you, but please know, that isn't why I made you come here."
    "What are you talking about?" Gray whispered as they slowly fell to their knees together.
    "I wanted to court you properly." The Fae went on, the tears unending. "I wanted to make sure you knew that you were not just a plaything. I can make people feel that way at times, I know."
    "No, I didn't think that. I-"
    "I brought you here because it was our sanctuary. For me, it still is. Here, in the dark, I can always be myself, my true, hideous, stupid, passionate self."
    "You're beautiful, and your only a little stupid. What's this all about? What's with the waterworks?" Grayson deflected the hair that began to fall into Siva's face with a swift hand, sloshing the tears away with his thumb.
    Siva covered his hand with his own, and shut his eyes tightly, though it did little to stop the pain in his heart from spewing forth. "Humans are different. They almost never find the rest of their soul. Maybe one in one thousand actually find that pure connection." His sobbing grew more violent as he continued, despite his vast efforts to contain them. "And- even, even to love someone, for them, it takes time. More time than we ever had."
    "Siva..."
    "Please, don't say it, if you don't really mean it. It will only be a cruelty now." The light began to fade away, and neither of them cared.
    "I'm sorry." Gray breathed, pulling Siva into his arms, pressing their foreheads together, Siva's long-dammed sorrow dripping onto his chest. "But, I know I could have loved you, if only I'd had the time."