Race Relations

Until I am no longer addicted

              

             “You didn’t have to that you know” Leila told Nathaniel as she walked back into the apartment.

“But I didn’t do anything. The guy actually thought you owed him after one stupid date”

“One stupid date that he showed up to” He heard Leila mumble and his heart dropped.

“Are you still holding that against me?”  He answered in a whisper, his voice hurt and Leila sighed.

“I’m sorry, it’s just that he’s a really nice guy you know, and it’s bad enough that he came all this way here and sees me with you, but you are here Nathaniel rubbing it in and that just isn’t right.”

“I wasn’t rubbing it in Leils, I was telling him not to bother anymore, because we’re together now.” He told her as he approached her. “But you’re right, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.” He told her as he took her hands in his and intertwined their fingers together, 

“And I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that” she apologized. Leaning forward so her so that her forehead touched his chest.

“It’s fine. I deserved that, I’m the one that stood you up. But you can’t keep holding that against me.” He told her, making her look up to see his oceanic eyes meeting her hazel ones.

“I know. It won’t happen again, promise” she told him, before he crashed his lips on hers.  He had missed her so much it was unreal. He could’ve sworn the day went on slower. It felt like forever since he had her in his arm, felt her heat.  When they broke apart, he told her,

“I missed you” which made her pull him into a hug and nuzzle her nose in the crook of his neck.

“I miss you too” she admitted. “The girls know about us” she told him as he gently moved his fingers up and down the arch of her back. “Whatever we are”

“Oh?”

“I didn’t tell them, Thomas just has a big mouth and then they kept questioning me, I told them we just like each other.”

“Why didn’t you tell them that we’re seeing each other?” he asked.

“Because, we hadn’t made that clear, and I’m not going to claim someone that is not claiming me. Plus, it’s like; are we dating or not?””

                And there it was; the big question. Were they dating? If he said yes, then nights out, public affection and eventually meeting the parents would be expected.  But a no, would be a swift incineration of their possibilities. He knew she wouldn’t want to be only friends. She wasn’t the type and by now he had gone too far to even consider the possibility of terminating this relationship. He just couldn’t. He had already become addicted to the drug.                                                                                                            

                Gently rolling his thumb on the side of her cheek, he asked her “exclusively?” but immediately regretted the words. Of course she meant exclusively,

“Uhmm… I don’t know. Are you dating anyone else? Do you want to keep dating and….”

“No; why is that even a question? Of course there is no one else; Only you. What I meant was,” he told her as he hugged her body tighter by her waist, “It would have to be exclusive because I’m not willing to share you.”  He told her and he immediately saw the smile that spread.