Masked

Introduction

Sometimes I feel like I'm there just to be there. All tangled up and tripping over my dark emotions in the swarm of people. Stuck in my messed up, out of order, life that I just can't ever put together to be exact.

I honestly feel like that I am that extra who you see in the background of a movie just standing there as the scene moves along. Basically those extras are just there just to be there while the main characters steal the gleaming spotlight.

I always wished I could have that beautiful spotlight. Just imagine, not being forgotten just after the scene is over because you are the one who matters the most to the audience and without you the show wouldn't go on.

On the other side, if you're an extra people forget you instantaneously after the short clip of the movie is over.

I guess the best way to describe my situation in simplest terms is that I'm the third wheel. No doubt about it. It's just I don't have any significance or anything just like a leaf drifting through the wind. It never has anywhere to go and it is all alone in the cold, striking wind on a gloomy day.

But my life wasn't always like this. In fact, everything was perfect and in place at a point. At least I thought so.

You know, a wagon can't run on three wheels but it can run on four. Well, I guess had finally I found that person who was that fourth wheel. The person who brought light to the darkness of my life. The person who loved me for who I was. He was the one. He taught me how to laugh on the darkest of days. He taught me to look at things always in an optimistic way and never in a negative way. He told me that make the best out of the worst things in life and for that I really want to thank him.

There used to be a time where I mattered. Where I wasn't just a small fish in the sea of people. Where I wasn't just a "nobody", I was a "somebody". People actually cared about me, even if it was just small things like saying "hello" and "how are you". 

They wouldn't ignore me. They would sit down and listen to what I had to say. I had a voice in that crowd and I could speak out about how I felt instead of just burying it in the back my deep dark mind with my other hidden emotions.

Sadly, that moment didn't last that long and before I knew it was all over. Everything, that I had loved just gone. My hopes and dreams, crumbled to dust.

It's truly amazing how people can change so drastically from good to bad. It's almost as if they are wearing a mask to hide what they truly are, a beast. A crazy, mindless beast. They put us down to make themselves feel better. But truly, they probably are insecure about themselves too.

Yes, I may be part of the background, but no one ever realized how much the people in the background are important. Although, they will, eventually.