The Good Boy's Bad Boy // Phan Smut

14: Cuddles

~Phil's POV~
"Hey... What's your problem with your dad?" Dan asked, holding me close to him. I laid in silence as I looked at my wrist. It hurts but it kinda feels good.

"You know how I'm gay..." I start. "Yea... Um Ni- I mean... Asshole told me... I don't know how he found out, but I know." I closed my eyes and tried turning to my other side to look at him. I was in pain, but did it. "Well..."

2 years ago

Nerves. That's all I felt. I've been hiding in the closet since I was 13 and I'm now 15. Lying to everyone that I'm straight, except to Pj and Chris. I cover it up by my Kill Bill poster and more.

But now I'm telling my mum that I'm gay.

She was sitting at the table reading a magazine. Should I do it now or no? She seems to be relaxed. I shouldn't be scared. She's my mum. I took a few breathers, and sat next to her.

"Hi mum." I said. "Hi Phil." She said looking at me. I sat in silence and my mum continued to read her magazine. "I need to tell you something." I said. "You're not in trouble at school are you?" She asked. "No." I looked at her. "What is it?" She puts the magazine down. "I hope you'll still love me as your son no matter what after I tell you something serious." I bit my cheek. "I'll still love you, Phil." She said. "I'm... Gay." I closed my eyes. "Mum... I'm gay."

Present time

"Then she hugged me and said she loves me. Later that day. My mum told my dad because I was still scared and couldn't do it. He was... Furious." Dan listened to me. "He called me a faggot and said I'm not his son until I learn how to not be a fag. It really hurts... Hearing those words from your own father. He practically disown me..." My voice kinda cracked. "I love and hate him much. He's my dad and he disowned me. His son. Just because I'm me" I start to cry and Dan holds me close to him.

"Shh... Shh... He isn't worth your time. If he can't accept you, he can fuck himself." Dan whispered. "But he's my dad. I just can't ignore him. I want the respect from him." I said and buried my head into Dan's chest.

"I hate it so much. I hate my dad. But I care about him. Because of him, I don't tell people about my sexuality. I'm quiet. My brother, Martyn, knows I am gay and is fine with it. It's just frustrating because I want to be accepted. Is that to much to ask for?" I asked.

"It's not. People are just assholes. And I was one of them." Dan said. "Why do you care about me. You have Abigal." I said. He kept quiet and just cuddled me. I sighed and cuddled back. What's the point of being upset. I like being in his arms right here and right now. It's calming. I grabbed his shirt and whispered, "please don't ever leave me like others do."

"I won't leave you."