I never told my best friend Niall about my past, I never even told anyone. Niall asked why but didn't really say anything more about it. I lived at his house because he asked me to. He didn't want to live alone, he said. I smiled and said that I would live with him. The first few months were difficult but after a while it was great. We've learned a lot about each other but still not everything. I guess it had to be this way.
Today the boys were here. We were playing Truth or Dare. It was Louis's turn. ''(y/n) Truth or Dare?'' he asked, facing me. ''Dare.'' I smiled. ''I Dare you to tell us about your past.'' Louis said. My smile faded away. ''You know I don't talk about that.'' I whisperd. ''Please. We want to know.'' Zayn said. ''You can't know.'' I said quietly. ''Why not?'' Harry asked. ''Because.. I just can't tell you guys okay?'' I snapped a little. ''Okay.'' Louis whisperd. We continued the game. They didn't ask about my past again. I had a feeling off guilt for snapping at them but I just couldn't tell them. Suddenly the boys said they had to go. We said goodbye and I cleaned up the glasses. I was in the kitchen when Niall walked in. ''So.. (y/n) are you okay?'' he asked nervously. I nodded. He looked at me worried. ''Niall, I'm fine.'' Niall nodded and walked away. I sighed and finished what I was doing. After that I walked upstairs to go sleeping.
A few hours later Niall woke me up. I was still half asleep. ''What is it, Nialler?'' I asked him sleepy. ''I want you to tell me.'' he said. I looked at him confused. ''No, go to bed. I want to sleep.'' I whisperd. ''Fine, than don't tell me. But can I sleep in your bed?'' he asked sweetly. I was to tired to resist so I nodded. He laid down next to me and cuddled into me. I played with his hair, knowing he would fall asleep quickly. After a few minutes he was asleep and so was I.
I woke up and saw Niall laying on top of me. He was quit heavy when he laid like that. I tried to wake him up. ''Nialler?'' I said as I stroke his cheek. His mouth formed a smile and his eyes slowely opened. ''What is it?'' he whisperd. ''I have to go.'' I whisperd back. He pulled himself closer to me and sighed. ''No, please don't go.'' I laughed a little. ''Nialler, I have to. I have to meet my friends.'' He sighed and looked in my eyes. ''Fine.'' he pouted. ''But, when will you get home?'' he asked before getting of off me. ''I'll be home before dinner. Will you cook?'' I asked him. He nodded. I got dressed and went to my friends.
I got home and opened the door. A amazing smell met my nose. ''Nialler?'' I yelled. ''Yeah in the kitchen.'' I heard him yell back. I walked to the kitchen to see a set table and a lot of food. I smiled and sat down. ''It looks really good.'' He smiled and said: ''Thank you.'' We ate all off the food and talked about a lot of things. Suddenly he asked me: ''(y/n) do you trust me?'' I looked at him confused and said: ''Yeah. With my life.'' He smiled. ''Can you do me a favor?'' I laughed. ''Ofcourse Nialler, tell me.'' He blushed. ''Can you try to tell me about your past.'' My smile faded again. It was quiet for a while until I said: ''Sure, I'll try.'' Nialls head flew up with surprise. Than a smile spread across his face. ''Come on..'' he said as he grabbed my hand and pulled me with him. ''Where are we going?'' I asked him confused. ''Upstairs. I want to lay in bed.'' he said with a smile. I laughed and walked after him. He sat on the bed waiting for me to come sit. When I sat on the bed he laid his head down on my lap and smiled at me. ''So tell me.'' he whisperd. I took a deap breath and played with his hair.
''So when I was 13 I was really depressed. My grandma was sick, like incurable sick. It broke my heart. And I had to change school because my grades were really bad. I had a lot of trouble. My boyfriend was treating me bad and I still stayed with him. I loved him so much. When we met he told me he was suicidal. He used to cut himself. At one point I tought I had to do it but I couldn't. I was so scared. I talked about it with him and he said that if I would cut, he would start it again. I was heartbroken. I didn't know what to do. So, one day, I was home alone. I was feeling so depressed and was crying. I walked to my room and grabbed a razor. I placed it on my arm and sliced my skin. From that moment on, I've been cutting. It stopped when I went to my new school but sometimes I wanted to do it again. At the end of the schoolyear my grandma past away. I wanted to cut again, but I didn't. I wanted her to be proud off me. I never told you guys because I'm so very ashamed.. You can see the scars. I regret it but at the same time I don't.'' I sighed. By this time I was crying. Niall was quiet and just looked at me. I saw tears in his eyes and on his cheeks. There was a time of silence. He broke the silence. ''Can I see them?'' he whisperd. I looked at him and pulled my sleeve up. He gasped and than trailed his fingers on the marks. ''Did it hurt?'' he whisperd. ''Sometimes. But I wanted to feel it. It was the only way to control my emotions.'' I whisperd back. ''Would you ever do it again?'' he asked quietly. I shook my head. ''No, it's bad.'' He smiled slightly. ''Yes, it is. Never do it again. I love you.'' he whisperd. Suddenly he kissed me. I was confused but kissed him back. ''Be mine?'' he asked me as he pulled away. I nodded and cried even more. ''I love you, princess. You're perfect.'' I smiled. ''I love you to, Nialler. You're my everything.'' He smiled and kissed me. I never cut again. Niall and I belonged together.
